Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion: Here is where we left off last week …..
The Aftermath: Tweets of the Cast Owning Their Behavior
Collected by NoMoreDrama
Rosie – after screaming a boat load of obscenities backstage – “I know some of u may be disappointed in my behavior however, MY DAD was & will ALWAYS be my SUPERMAN! I WILL PROTECT HIS HONOR ALWAYS! Nite”
Kathy – after calling Teresa’s mom a f’ing liar “Not proud of saying that !! But don’t ATTACK MY MARRIAGE !! EVER !!”
Jacqueline – – – – – (not tweeting – good for her)
Lauren “Well- there ya have it- I had a lot to say I just wish they showed the nasty things she said to me”
Caroline “TRUE – I was a bit** that had enough of the nonsense = Caroline Manzo Season 4 – FYI – I didn’t like her, she’s gone now.”
Teresa – not tweeting
Melissa “I don’t know about you.. But we are sipping
@VoliSpirits over here…”
(Melissa didn’t tweet anything of substance – it was all about her hair, makeup, music, etc. I think she’s the spokesperson for VoliSpirits.
And the host …
Andy’s response: “tense”
A joke from Albie “Is it safe? Heard
@RosiePierri screaming and hid under my résumé. Granted it wasn’t the best spot but I just kinda froze.”
And from Jaime Laurita –
“I hope the finale ends on a good note somehow. Lets hope they find peace somewhere during all this. good night.”
The funny moments: Boston’s Photo
And the Trainwreck: Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion – Part 1 of 4,487,098 – By Stars99
Ugh…will this season EVER come to an end? We’ve all been sentenced to a 3-part Reunion, ugh… This season has been forever seared into our collective brains as the season that would not end! I really do think we need to initiate a class action lawsuit against Bravo since: 1) RHONJ has continually failed to meet even the lowest of customer expectations; 2) Bravo has demonstrated willful gross negligence in the creation and perpetuation of RHONJ; 3) their product is defective and misrepresents itself as an unscripted reality show; 4) Bravo willfully, knowingly and consistently lies, manipulates, and manufactures drama by creative editing, by reordering the sequence of events, and by splicing unrelated statements together to weave a web of deceit; 5) all of the housewives are directly complicit in each of the aforementioned; and, 6) we, as consumers, were not adequately protected against the biohazard fallout from watching this season. Alrighty then… on to the Reunion!
Andy begins by summoning his ominous and foreboding voice saying, “After a season of heartache and betrayal, the NJ housewives face each other for the first time in a year. (huh? Yes, folks – they filmed last year’s reunion – you know, the one Jacqueline didn’t show up for – the day AFTER this season’s Posche Fashion Show… are you confused yet? It only goes downhill from here….). Compulsory niceties are exchanged between each housewife and Andy…
- Jacqueline (Jac) – “So glad you decided to join us this year.”
- Teresa (Tre) – “Three cookbooks, 3 New York Times bestsellers… Congratulations.”
- Melissa (Mel) – “Songs all over iTunes charts… Congratulations.”
- Caroline (Caro) – “Love the longer hair, book to come from you… Congratulations.”
Kathy – “You look great… new nose? It looks great… and am I noticing something new with the lips as well?” Kathy responded, “After I got my nose done, my lips seemed smaller so I just plumped them up a little.” Andy proceeds to give her a yellow light on having any more work done. As if she cares. Gotta say I’m disappointed that they didn’t talk about shoes.
Rehash of why Jac didn’t show up to last year’s Reunion and More Jac
Andy pointed out to Tre that she had not seen Jac since the night of last year’s Posche Fashion Show. Tre says, “I don’t miss her, I’ve moved on, I’m in a really good place right now, and I’m happy.” Queue tape of this season’s Posche blowout. Andy turns to Jac and asks her why she didn’t show up for last year’s reunion taping. Jac said, “I was so disgusted with the whole thing.” It seems that it culminated when Tre tried to blame Jac for everything… Caro and Jac are annoyingly talking over each other. Caro insists that everyone was terrified for Jac’s wellbeing at that point of time. Andy asks Tre what she meant when on last year’s reunion, she said that Jac should have finished what she had started?
Tre says, “I haven’t spoken to my brother since the fashion show because Jac said I was involved in the set up.” Jac interrupts by saying, “You were.” Tre responds with “Prove it, Bitch”… Jac, “You were…and you know how I know, because you asked me to do it…that’s how I know – You wanted me to do that at the beginning of the season.” Tre, “Excuse me?” Jac further states, “And, I DO have a recording that is apparently illegal to share…” Tre responds with a snarky, “Correct.” Jac, “That it’s your friend admitting that you knew.” Tre, “No I didn’t…” Additional snark commenced about how Jac had ruined their family… Mel stepped up and said that to blame Jac for ruining their family was ridiculous. Some more nonsense ensued about the only time that Tre has seen Mel was at Gia and Milannia’s birthday party… Caro and Jac are annoyingly talking amongst themselves making nasty comments… about giving Tre enough rope to hang herself… Then Jac makes up for not being on last season’s reunion by hogging the air time through her nonstop talking… She tattles that Tre said bad things about her brother and Mel before filming ever began. Mel and Tre are fighting amongst themselves about whether Tre just loves her brother… her brother and his kids… or if, indeed Mel was included the mix of love… Andy wants to move forward… lolol… so do we!
They then about Jac and daughter Ashley’s struggles this season… and how Jac was trying to get Ashley back on track. That would imply, actually, that she was once on track, no? She seems to be doing well at this point and has a paying job in California. Yay! Andy questions Jac about the $8,000,000 for an apparel company’s bankruptcy. Jac explains, that her husband’s company was forced into a bankruptcy. The creditors, in an attempt to get back some of the money, launched allegations that they had used private planes for personal use, but Jac insists that it never happened. Andy wanted clarification on the difference between Jac’s husband’s corporate bankruptcy vs. Tre’s personal bankruptcy. Jac insists it’s completely different, because Tre and her husband went out and spent a whole bunch of money and built a whole mound of debt and then filed. Jac assures us that when their bankruptcy is settled, that she will give us all the info… ‘cuz she will be tweeting all the details. O joy… O rapture.
Andy directly asks Jac, “Do you have a tweeting problem?” Jac responds that she is impulsive. Andy further probes, “Do you think before you tweet?” Jac instantly responds, “No.” Andy says in his most nurturing voice that she sometimes comes off on twitter as a little – then he does the universally known hand gesture for wackadoo. Then some conversation occurs about how Jac may tweet about Tre… but she insists it’s better than doing what Tre does, which is to talk about Jac behind her back. Tre says it’s all lies.
Meanwhile, since Mel hasn’t yet gotten enough airtime during the reunion, she starts an argument with Tre. She says that if Tre isn’t lying, then it would mean that every other person is lying. Tre says that she is not afraid to own up to the things she says. Mel dramatically holds up her hand and says, “Whatever, be quiet, go home, whatever.” Then they get into some nonsense about how Mel wants everything to be perfect for the cameras and that she is constantly chirping in her husband’s ear about the latest thing that Tre has done. Mel insists she doesn’t have to chirp in his ear since he sees it all with his own eyes because he wants to be a real housewife, too. Well, she doesn’t actually say that last part – but I think it was implied but not stated.
Meanwhile, Jac, in a weak attempt to be cute and to recapture that funny scene where she was pretending to be asleep throughout another recent conflict, grabs a pillow and actually partially lies down. Awww, Caro thinks that’s awfully cute. So does Andy. I don’t. Where’s her pacifier and binky? Alas, Mel and Tre are STILL arguing about how Mel tweets a picture every time she’s at her parent’s house. Mel said that it only happened once. Mel further insists, “You’re a liar, and that’s why your family is a mess, because Miss Matriarch (meaning Tre… I wonder if that title comes with a tiara and a sash?) wrecks the family… Do you see how you just brought your parents into it?” Tre insists she loves this… Bring it on!
Andy wants to get back to Jac and her son Nicholas who has been diagnosed with autism… Cut to truly heartbreaking video segments over the last 3 years with Nick and others. In one poignant scene, you hear Jac saying “I love you” and Nick saying an audible, “I love you” and then Jac and Caro both completely break down because he doesn’t say that anymore. Caro comforts the sobbing Jac repeatedly with the words, “He’s gonna say it again… he’s gonna say it again…he will, someday.” Andy is confused at why he doesn’t say it anymore – and Caro clarifies, “He’s regressed, he doesn’t speak.” Jac says he says words but not sentences at this point. Andy asks if that kind of regression is common, and Jac confirms that it is.
Tre is blown away that he can’t say it any more ‘cuz she remembers him being able to say it. Then unfortunately, she brings up that Nick was her daughter Adrianna’s boyfriend, but now they’ve broken up. This absolutely flips Caro’s fig, and she goes in complete attack mode and calls Tre’s dress a “Christmas Pageant dress” and that she should sit back and shut the f** up. Caro seems to feel that Tre is making this conversation loop back around to the All About Tre Show.
Carol threatens to go berserk. Ummm…. Isn’t it a little too late? oooOOoo then Tre calls Carol an “Old hag” Oh, no she di’int…. Jac was questioned about why she broke the news about Nick’s autism via the People Magazine article and why she didn’t want to talk on camera about what was going on as the season progressed. Jaq just said that they wanted to get a diagnosis, and a treatment plan, and have time to figure things out. She confirmed that she did not get paid for the article.
Make New Friends, but Keep the Old, One is Silver, the Other – Gold
Now it’s on to the heartbreaking fracture of a long term relationship – Jac and Tre… We see scenes leading up to their friendship divorce. After seeing the footage, Tre’s heart was evidently beating fast again. She asks Andy to feel her heart to verify it – Why does everyone hafta feel Tre’s heart? Remember that night when they were camping, and Jac and Tre made up and had that touching kumbaya moment and they ushered in world peace? Well, later that night, when the rv windows were open, Jac says she overheard Tre saying how much she hated Jac, and that she couldn’t even stand to look “at her f*ing face”… Tre further said how everyone is just jealous of her because she’s on the cover of magazines. Tre says it’s their problem, and blah, blah, blah. Mel confirmed that Tre was talking to her that night. Tre never denied saying those things. Nice.
Andy wondered what caused this breakup? Jac said that when Mel and Kathy were first coming on the show that Jac felt bad for Tre because she knew she didn’t want them on the show. Tre clarified, “Because I didn’t want this to happen” – as she gestured around the reunion set. Jac said, “And you didn’t like them – you didn’t like them. And you wanted me to call them out on everything….” Tre said, “Well, you would say things to me behind the cameras, but when the cameras were on you wouldn’t say it.” Jac blurted, “You were telling ME what to say, making me feel uncomfortable, and I had other s** going on in my life, but you couldn’t give a f*** – All you cared about was exposing them, that’s it – the entire season.” Tre said, “About what?” Jac responded, “You wanted me to call her out about being a stripper, and that Kathy didn’t get a designer bag until she was 40, like that meant something”… Kathy chimes in, “And that I lived in a sh**** house.” Tre says, “I never said she was a stripper.” Jac gasped, “What?” Then, Jac dramatically says, “I swear on my child, who is autistic that you wanted me to call her out.” (Okay, wait a freakin’ minute… who swears on their child? I mean, who does this? And who throws a disability into the mix?) Caro says, “She told all of us that she was a stripper.” Mel reiterates as if we haven’t heard it before, “Which I wasn’t.” Jac says, “You’re a liar, you are sick, you are going to hell, you are going to HELL.” Tre reacts, “You’re the devil, ‘cuz you’re wearing red.” Jac retorts, “And you’re green with envy.” Oh, snap!
The subject shifts to Caro at the doctor who said her symptoms suggest she might be going through menopause. They repeat the talking head interview with Tre when she says, “Caro’s going through menopause? THAT explains why she’s been such a bitch lately.” Andy then goes through some choice names viewers have had for Caro, including, Bully, sh** stirrer, and my personal favorite – “bitter ginger with a twist of lemon face.” lolol. Caro admits she did not like herself this season. She actually almost had a doctor diagnose her as a bitch – since her hormone levels are exactly where they should be BEFORE going through menopause. Yikes. Lauren comes out and she’s lost 35 pounds since her lap band surgery. She had previously lost weight the old fashioned way, but she would lose 50 lbs. and then gain 60 lbs. back.
Caro was called out for saying that she couldn’t relate to Lauren’s weight struggle – but it was obvious that she was much heavier in Season 1 and then lost weight – Caro said she meant she couldn’t relate to Lauren’s weight issues as a young girl because Caro’s weight issues didn’t start until she was much older. Caro actually likened herself to Mel. Snicker, snicker. She said Lauren had to learn that she is wonderful. Andy said, “But on the flip side, you were also harsh and direct – do you think that contributed to her low self-esteem?” Caro, “First of all, I did not say it to her face.” Andy surprisingly stood up to her and said, “Well isn’t that worse, saying it behind her back?” Caro said that Lauren had been behaving like an a**hole – and that she’d say it again.
A viewer questions Tre about her opinion on if Caro is a good mom and how does she think her kids have turned out? Tre thinks they’re great, but that until Black Water that they didn’t have jobs. Rut roh. Then Lauren and Caro start really reacting… Lauren starts listing off the jobs that she and her brothers have had but Caro stops Lauren from answering the question and instead calls Tre a fool. Tre says that she’s been working since she was 14 years old. Caro demands Tre to look at her face cuz she’s gonna educate her, then calls her “pageant girl.” Tre responds with a robust, “look at you – you have three layers – blubber, blubber and blubber.” Caro responds, “And you know what? I wear them proud.” Tre says, “With a tummy tuck! You couldn’t walk for 4 months because you were hunched over.” Andy jumps on this, “So, you’ve had a tummy tuck?” Meanwhile, Mel and Kathy are snarking back and forth, “that’s so wrong.” Caro confirms she had one when she was 39. Then Caro says, “I have no botox, I have no fillers…. I’ve never had a face lift…” Tre inserts, “Well, you should get some”…Oh, snap!
Mel tries to tell Tre not to go by people’s looks… Tre reminds Mel that she’s not asking for her opinion. Tre said, “She started with my dress, thank you very much.” Lauren chimes in, “Do you realize, that what you’re saying to her right now, is why people out there kill themselves? Tre says, “So that’s why you got a lap band… Why didn’t you work hard?” Lauren yells, “Because of di**heads like you, that’s why.” Then they exchange some additional profanities… and Lauren promises next year she will look even better… and Tre cautioned that sometimes the weight comes back on and Lauren says that it’s her problem and not Tre’s. Lauren digresses to talking about Tre’s Gia and what conversations she may or may not be listening to until Carol tells her to stop with the kids. Then they somehow jump to the question “What does Napalm mean?”… and Tre looks blank… and I guess it was a word Tre used in her blog. They’re trying to prove she has a professional writer compose it and that it’s somehow unfair that they all didn’t have that same brilliant idea. Someone who writes manifestos could really use an editor, but no names mentioned. When Andy directly asks Tre if she wrote her own blog, Tre immediately says, “Yes.” Color me confused and doubtful.
The 30 second fake out between commercials confirms that Jac has had filler in her cheekbones and work on her lips – but she insists that it’s nothing permanent. Wow… Jac has a really creepy plastic smile… well, I guess we all do… fortunately, ours isn’t on national TV.
Andy asks Tre about the story in “In Touch”… in which she apologizes. He asks if she meant it. Tre says she did. Then somehow the conversation digresses into the fact that Tre has called them all a cu** at one time or another… and then somehow Tre talks about Mel’s glitter eye shadow and how Tre had worn that same glitter eye shadow on last year’s reunion show which further supposedly demonstrates that Mel wants to be Tre. Really? Are you kidding me? After some more gratuitous snarking, Caro suggests that Tre encourages Gia to provide articles to magazines – since there’s a new article about her in the younger version of In Touch or In Style magazine. Tre then jumps to the conclusion that they all want to be her because they know everything that’s going on about her and her family’s lives. She says she doesn’t know a single thing that’s going on in any of their lives, because as she emphatically says, “because I don’t give a fu**.” Silence fills the land. Why oh why didn’t she say that earlier?
Kathy Finds a Voice
Signal subject change to Kathy. Don’t they usually save the best for last? Sigh. We see Kathy’s meager storyline involving her daughter visiting a college campus and Kathy’s foray into the dessert business. We see that uncomfortable meeting involving her darling husband, who is no friend to her business ventures, and how he really tried to screw up her meeting with the bigwigs. Then they start talking about Richie, who, arguably has said not nice things about Tre in front of her and behind her back. Kathy indicates that he doesn’t reserve all of his jokes and insults just for Tre, but everyone is fair game. Tre insists that “all these people here – are insignificant to me.” To Tre, no one at the reunion is important enough to give a sh** about and that it all goes in one ear and out the other. However, she does have, in fact, have a handy dandy outline all of the jabs Richie has made at her on national tv. Then Kathy and Tre trade nauseous faces at the prospect of the other’s husband….
Tre decides it would be fun to pit Richie against Juicy Joe to see who could pick up more girls. Sadly, this isn’t a contest of physical strength but of animal magnetism. Shiver. Then Tre talks about Ritchie’s yellow teeth… Wow. Caro called Tre on the carpet for that comment… and Tre said that it was okay for Ritchie to say anything and everything about Tre because Caro loves Kathy right now and that Kathy is her puppet. Kathy says, “I am no puppet, what’s right is right.” Caro says to Tre, “I also defended your husband when no one else did.” (Brace yourselves…no, really…) Tre says, “Well, that’s because you know Joe, and he’s a great guy.” (Gag) Kathy says in the absolutely most sarcastic voice possible, “Yeah, really great!”
Then the question was asked about when does Kathy’s dessert line come out? Kathy tells us that it’s very soon… that it will start with a Cannoli Kit – so ladies can be their own goddess of sweets in their own kitchen. Andy asks about Victoria and college. Kathy confirmed that she’s staying local and that Kathy couldn’t be happier. A viewer asked if Kathy meant to insult Tre at the cookbook signing. Kathy said, “No, I went to the signing to be supportive of her.” Tre looks over at Kathy and says, “You’re so disgusting, you’re a piece of sh**.” Whoaaa… Kathy, maintaining full sarcastic mode, makes kissy face gestures at Tre. Then Tre insists Kathy not point at her… Kathy starts yelling, “Why don’t I grab your face like you grabbed mine.” Tre dares her to grab it because, “Then I’ll sue your ass.” (OooOOOoo that’s how she’ll make some extra income.) Kathy says, “Oh, should I sue you – well I won’t get anything out of you ‘cuz you ain’t got sh**.”
Kathy says that she always tried to help Tre when she would call and bitc* about everyone including her in-laws…. Tre says, “Just like you had problems with your in-laws and you almost got divorced.” Kathy says she never almost got divorced. Tre says that even Tre’s mother knows and Kathy responds, “Well, you’re mother is a fu***ing liar, too.” Then Tre moves over to sit next to Caro for protection…and the earth stood still and hell froze over. Jac sarcastically asks Tre if she wants to snuggle. In the background you hear Kathy saying how Tre’s mom was going around telling everybody that Kathy had the lap band surgery. Tre is in shock, but is still sitting next to Caro….and she keeps saying, “Wow…” then she decides she wants Kathy to say that to Tre’s dad… Kathy says that she went to go speak to Tre’s mom and dad, but that her dad walked out… “Because he’s a coward.” Holy crap on a cracker! Did she just say that?
Whoa… then Tre… ohholynightthestarsarebrigthlyshining, says while referring to Kathy, “This is a person who my dad loved… and they worshipped my dad… my dad was there more for them than their own dad.” Kathy goes bat crap crazy, “You’re a liar! Don’t you dare bring up my father… “ Meanwhile, Mel is desperately trying to get Andy’s attention and says, “Rosie is going to kill her… Rosie.will.kill.her. (it was even close captioned for emphasis.) Gulp.
Then you hear it… from off stage… Rosie emphatically saying, “My father’s dead. Tell her to fu**ing stop. I swear to God.” And you see Rosie walking around and you hear a walkie talkie voice saying “she’s walking, she’s walking”… and Rosie implores them to “Let me get the f*** out of here. Let me go. No, no, no, I’m serious.” Rosie tells someone offstage to make Tre stop talking because her father is deceased. Onstage, Kathy is still ranting about Tre talking about her dead father…. Then Rosie starts screaming, “I will rip her fu**ing head off. I mean it! I mean it! My father’s untouchable.” Tre, “Who’s yelling?” Kathy says, “You know who’s yelling.” More Rosie yells, “I swear to Christ! She better watch her f**ing tongue! Cuz I’ll cut it right the fu** out. I swear to God. I don’t care if I get locked up. I’ll f**ing kill her!”
I’ve got to go take a shower and invest in a biohazard suit for next week. See you for Part 2!
Let us all take a moment to remember what is really important!
Fabulicious On-the-Grill: Teresa’s Smoking Hot Backyard Recipes by Teresa Giudice and Heather Maclean (May 7, 2013)
Remember – for those of you that would like to discuss politics – you’ve got your own page. Please see the tab in the header.
And with that – let Part 2 of the games begin: