Scott Baio’s Wife goes on a Homophobic Rant against Andy Cohen? by NoMoreDrama
Confession. My teenage bedroom wall was lined with photos of Scott Baio. Yes, like Andy Cohen, I had a schoolgirl crush on Chachi. If I ever got to sit across the couch from him, I’d probably be giddy with excitement. Andy Cohen certainly was, and last night’s Watch What Happens Live was like watching a giggle fest. Unfortunately Chachi was not amused. More specifically MrsScottBaio was not amused. That’s right. Chachi has grown up and is married to a woman who identifies herself on twitter as “MrsScottBaio” with the tagline “@MrsScottBaio I married most girls teen Dream Boy.Together we have an amazing girl, whom we named our nonprofit after. The Bailey Baio Angel Foundation.” And MrsScottBaio was not amused by Andy’s questions about Scott’s past with other women, and the silly CrotchyChachi game. MrsScottBaio was so not amused, she took to twitter with what her followers described as a homophobic rant against Andy Cohen. I can’t verify this, because her tweets are locked. But she does have a history of this sort of thing.
Andy was in fine form last night. But I also find it hard to believe that Scott Baio’s publicist hadn’t checked out the show before booking the former teen star, who is out on a promotion tour of his new comedy on Nick at Nite. He’s also been on a show called See Dad Run. I’ve got to admit I have’t heard much about Scott Baio in a while. Seems like he’s on a comeback tour and making the PR circuit in New York. He taped live with Kelly and Michael and made an assortment of other stops including the one to Andy’s Clubhouse. In short – if he didn’t do his homework on what sort of show he was going on, he shouldn’t be complaining.
Scott called Andy (or Andy’s games) disrespectful. Andy did his usual thing for Plead the 5th – asked Scott about his past with various women including Liza Minelli (Scott pleaded the 5th on that one). Perhaps what put it over the top was the silly game Crotchy Chachi where the guests had to figure out “Who’s crotch is it?”
Andy took it in stride. At first he didn’t seem to know Scott was mad.
But then he made a joke about it. I hope MrsScottBaio gets his Jackhole award tomorrow. Oh – and when Scott gets his new show – I won’t be watching. Sorry – but schoolgirl crush is crushed.
Housewife News by NoMoreDrama
Sonja Morgan will host a Broadway After Dark show on October 29th. Go Sonja!
Jill Zarin is claiming that she has millions of fans that would like to see her return to TV according to reports in many media outlets. That makes total sense to me.
(Thank you Boston)
Amazing Race – Leg 3 – Oct 21, 2012 by MelTheHound
Welcome back race fans… Here is where we stand after the 3 episodes.
- Abbie & Ryan – Dating Divorcees
- Trey and Alexis -Dating couple (Texas)
- Rob and Kelley -Married Monster Truckers
- Jaymes and James – Chippendales
- Gary and Will – Substitute Teachers
- Josh and Brent – Goat Farmers (Beekmans)
- James and Mark – Friends (Rockers)
- Natlalie and Nadiya – Twins
Welcome back race fans. Last week we lost Caitlin and Brittany – Best Friends (Blondes) to their inability to communicate with their transportation. It just wasn’t in the cards for them I guess. By the way. Note that in my list of teams, they aren’t in any particular order. Because other than first and last place, it doesn’t really matter much unless someone is WAY behind. While it’s true they begin the next leg in the order they arrived separated by time difference, Usually, they are all going to the same place, on the same mass transport (plane, train) and they’ll be even anyway. Unless, that is, seating is limited. There are situations where being in first place on a race leg will give an advantage but this week, is not one of them. The teams are headed for Dhaka Bangladesh. They will get their via airplane by way of Singapore and everyone is on the same flight that will arrive at 10am the following day. See what I mean?
Once there the teams are to go to a bus repair station, via taxi, to get their next clue. Remember last week, a blind double U Turn was included in the leg of the race. The first time, according to Phil btw, that’s ever been done that way. Gary and Will are unsure of who turned them but they have the suspicion that it was monster truckers. That pair feels as long as they stay in front of the sub teachers, no retribution can come. When the plane lands, all the teams except one race to hail a taxi. The ones who didn’t, Monster Truckers. Instead they just went to the cab stand and chartered a taxi. Now they are in first place. It won’t last long because their driver takes them to the landfill rather than the bus repair depot they were supposed to go to.
Eventually, the teams all get there and the task is a roadblock, Fill in the gaps. What they have to do is some body work on one of the many buses that are in the shop to be repaired. In other words, spread and sand some bondo (or fiberglass). Most of these people have obviously never worked with the stuff before. One said they were adding a color component to the body filler (that’s the hardener and knowing how much to use is a skill in itself). Once they finished filling the area of the body they were there to fix, it would be inspected at which time they could begin sanding. Once the sanding was completed, the team member could move to the next task which was to take 3 of the bus seats to the refurbish guy elsewhere at the facility.
A few highlights… First of all, I once again want to smack the twins. Every 5 seconds TWINNIE, TWINNIE. Trust me the others wanted to smack her too. I don’t know which one was doing the task because I cannot tell them apart and honestly, I don’t care. They are equally annoying. I’ll give them though, that they did pretty well at the task. A couple players had to scrape their work off of the bus and start over. Monster trucker knows body work so it was a no brainer for him. Ryan of Divorcees, made pretty short work but in the process destroyed his next clue. I don’t know how that happened but in order to get the information, (to carry the bus seats), he helped Chippers get their body work under control. Gary (sub teachers), made such a mess of the stuff it was unbelievable. Mix it right, Thin coats fellas. Will is trying to encourage him, Gary is barking back at him. Um, Gary is kind of a dick to will.
Along with this roadblock, was the opportunity for a Fast Forward. This is an option available only to one team and only the first one to finish it can use it. No one, except Rockers decided to try it. If two teams had tried, the second one to finish it would have to go back and do the roadblock. The fast forward was to go to three collection points with a bag, and collect dead rats to be disposed of by the pest control guy. These were already dead, and in buckets waiting for them so it isn’t like they had to kill them or chase them around or anything like that. Once they finish, they can go to the pit stop. We’ll hold on to that for a moment.
Back at the bus repair depot, they each get their new clue. It is to go to the local market and dig through these bags of dead fish to find the one that carries the game colors for their next clue. Backing up a little bit, when Trey and Lexi left the airport, their cab driver had to stop for gas. That’s Natural Gas, not gasoline. After they left the bus repair place, their cab broke down. Looks like it overheated. Everyone else is way ahead of them at this point except the teachers. Teachers pass them by and believe that they are once again the luckiest SOBs in this race. Hold that thought fellas.
The fish clue is a detour. Pound Iron or Pound Cotton. Pound Iron they have to become blacksmiths. Stoking their own fire and with the help of a real blacksmith, they must pound the end of an iron rod to a point, like a steak or a chisel. In Pound Cotton, they are literally pounding the cotton that will be used to fill a mattress that they will then sew up. Twins, Monster Truckers, and Texas do the blacksmith thing, the other three teams do the mattress bit. Remember, Rockers are collecting dead rats on the fast forward. Divorcees, get to the mattress task, Abbie did a year at the fashion institute so she’s good with a needle and thread. Long story short, Everyone gets through their tasks the first time around except Chippendales who didn’t put all the stuffing in the mattress. The next clue of course is the pit stop. Perhaps of interest to some, It is noted that Josh is also experienced at sewing. He was once a drag queen named Aquadesiac (sp?) and made his own costumes. You are all free to look that up if you want, I’m not that interested in it.
I don’t know if any of these people paid attention to the fact that the rockers were no where to be seen. Twins and Divorcees believe they are in a race for first place. However, Rockers do take that honor. To get to the pit stop, teams must take a cab to the river, ride a riverboat to a certain location, and then find Phil.
Rockers came in first and win a trip to some resort on some island. I didn’t quite catch it. Divorcees are second followed almost at the same time as twins, who take third. Those two teams were on the same boat. Now it gets a little interesting.. Monster truckers should have taken Third but they didn’t ride the riverboat. Instead, a smaller fishing type boat (as many others did) who took them directly to Phil. Phil says, no, can’t do that, you have to tag up at each location. So, they go back to do that, with Rob bitching at his boat driver that he’s just cost him a million dollars. Not so fast there green hair. Another who has forgotten where he is or more importantly, is not. Beekmans take the honor of 4th place followed by Monster Truckers in 5th. Dude, you have to win the race before you can claim the million.. Just sayin. Chippendales take 6th and are happy just to still be in the race. Now it’s a race for 7th place between Texas and the sub teachers. For Both teams, Their drivers take them directly to the pit stop. Texas gets there first and they are the first to disembark to properly complete the race. As they return, they let the sub teachers in on the mistake that they too have just made. So they also have to back and properly finish the race. Of course, they are the last to check in, it’s an elimination round, they are done. Trey and Lexi win the race for 7th place.
That’s about it folks. See you next time.
Sorry friends, Pictures didn’t work out too well this time.
BASKETBALL WIVES – L.A. By Detox
Welcome back to Basketball Wives L.A.
We begin this week with Malaysia and Draya meeting for dinner. Brooke is also supposed to be meeting them, but she has not yet arrived. Draya interviews that she does not want to be in a weird position with Brooke because, now that she has met Bambi, she actually LIKES her.
Malaysia and Draya start discussing the present (bad) situation between Draya and Jackie, who have not seen each other since they almost got into fisticuffs at Gloria’s going-away party. Draya tells Malaysia that she is “not f*ckin with Jackie” (anymore)! She also tells Malaysia that if, in the future, Malaysia EVER hears her say that she wants to be friends with Jackie again, she wants Malaysia to SLAP her.
I understand what Draya is saying, and this sounds like a good idea IN THEORY. In my own PERSONAL experience, however, it has not quite worked out. For example, I once began my 2nd year of law school by walking into the building and having one of my friends, who I had not seen all Summer break, walk right up to me and say, “I have broken up with ‘Mr. X!’ He is CRAZY! If you EVER hear me tell you that I have gotten back together with him or if you ever SEE me with him again, I want you to just SLAP me!! Do you understand?”
I said, “Ummm….KINDA, I guess. Basically, if you get back together with him, you have gone temporarily insane, and you want me to be a good friend and SLAP some sanity and sense back into you, is that right?” She said, “EXACTLY!!”
Well, I could NOT understand why she stopped speaking to me after I’d seen her holding hands and being all lovey-dovey with him a week later as he walked her to a class she and I took together. As per her instructions, when she sat down next to me in class, right before the class started, I SLAPPED her across her face. It was not THAT hard either (She was SUCH a Drama Queen about it!).
She opened her mouth in shock and asked me why I did it. I reminded her of her prior request. She told me, in a very shocked and annoyed tone, “I wasn’t SERIOUS, you IDIOT!!” She also did not speak to me for a while before she got over it and called me up to be friends again.
So, Malaysia, WHATEVER you DO, do NOT slap Draya if she says she wants to be friends with Jackie again! She will probably get angry. And the Producers might fire you because you are interfering with their new storyline of “Draya and Jackie becoming BEST BUDS again!” Just a few words to the wise. You can thank me later.
Anyhoo….back to our regularly-scheduled programming, after Draya issues her order to Malaysia for a future SLAP, the subject of Jackie’s upcoming 17th Wedding comes up. Draya emphatically tells Malaysia that she is NOT going. She explains that, of course, ONE of the reasons she is not going is because of the present unresolved animosity between herself and Jackie.
She further explains that ANOTHER reason she will not be attending is because she feels like Jackie, by having her wedding in a gay club and by calling it a tribute and a dedication to the LGBT community, is actually making a MOCKERY of the LGBT community. In Draya’s opinion, it is insensitive of Jackie and Doug to get married for the 17th time, no less, in a place for the LGBT Community and in front of a crowd made up of several members of the LGBT community who do not even have the RIGHT to get married THEMSELVES (I think Draya makes an excellent point, and she actually appears to be sincere when making it. So, I understand the position from which she is coming. On the other hand, even though I think Jackie is as crazy as a road lizard, I DO have to be fair and say that I DO think her and Doug’s decision to handle their 17th Wedding in this way is a very nice and very sincere gesture toward the LGBT Community on their part. So, I see BOTH sides of the issue).
Brooke finally arrives to meet the girls for lunch in a dress that looks to be about 13 sizes too small (And you guys KNOW I have always complimented Brooke on having a SLAMMING body. Despite that, she deserved to be locked up by the fashion police for that dress – or at least to have been given a ticket for walking out of the house in her young daughter’s dress! I mean, what if her daughter wanted to wear it that day! I sure hope Brooke asked her daughter if she could borrow it).
Once Brooke takes her seat (How she was able to even SIT in that dress is BEYOND me!), she joins Malaysia and Draya’s conversation. Malaysia tells Brooke and Draya that she feels like Jackie takes her for granted, and because of this, she has decided to pull Jackie aside at the 17th Wedding Rehearsal Dinner to honestly discuss her feelings with Jackie. Brooke tells Malaysia she understands her position. She then says that she will still be attending Jackie’s wedding.
Malaysia then tells Brooke and Draya that she also feels like Jackie used her to become friends with Bambi and then “dumped” her for her new B.F.F., Bambi, when Bambi was Malaysia’s friend in the FIRST place.
Finally, Malaysia says that, at this point, she does not even know if she will even be attending and serving as a bridesmaid in the ACTUAL wedding (I guess this depends on how her conversation with Jackie at the Rehearsal Dinner goes).
Jackie and Doug are at their home sitting in their living area. Jackie interviews that she and Doug are getting ready to meet with the Officiant that they have chosen to preside over their 17th Wedding. She tells Doug that she is nervous about the meeting because she is unsure how the Officiant is going to feel presiding over a wedding celebration being held in a gay club and being dedicated to the LGBT Community.
The Officiant arrives and sits down to talk to Doug and Jackie about the particulars of their wedding ceremony. He begins by congratulating Jackie and Doug for being married 17 years, and he notes that he and his wife have been married for 20 years.
Jackie then takes a deep breath and tells the Officiant that she and Doug are having their 17th Wedding in a gay club, and they are dedicating the entire ceremony to the LGBT Community. She then asks him if he is uncomfortable with this. He smiles and says that he is TOTALLY comfortable and has NO problem with presiding over their wedding. Jackie interviews that, once they got that tough question out of the way, the rest of their meeting with the Officiant was “smooth sailing.”
Jackie and Doug tell the Officiant that they have each written personal vows to each other (Since they do this EVERY year and have done so for the past 16 years, I wonder if they save their vows to a document and ever just CUT and PASTE. That is what I would do, but that is probably why I am NOT married…..because, in the words of Sweet Brown, “I ain’t got time FA DAT!!!” *Shrug*). The Officiant, seeing the sheets of paper in Jackie and Doug’s hands, asks Jackie & Doug to at least let him have a couple of hours to review their vows before the ceremony in order to get familiar with them. They agree.
Once the Officiant leaves, Jackie tells Doug that all of the girls, except for Draya, will be attending. She reminds him that Laura will be her 2nd Maid of Honor (Their daughter Shanny will be her 1st Maid of Honor). She then says that Malaysia will also be there as a bridesmaid (Not so fast, Jac! Malaysia’s got to TALK to you about some things first!). She then notes that Bambi (who she has now known for about 15 minutes) will also be there as a bridesmaid. She again states that Draya will NOT be there! Jackie tells Doug that she is going to make sure to have Security “on the lookout” for Draya just in case she decides to show up (I hate to break this to you, Jac, but I think Draya would rather be in…..Oh, I don’t know…..a DESERT with NO water….than be at your wedding. No offense. Just keepin’ it real, you delusional AMAZON!!).
It is now the day of the Wedding Rehearsal Dinner. We see Jackie, Doug, their daughter, Chantal (a.k.a. Shanny), and other unnamed individuals arrive at the wedding venue (which is the Gay Club whose name escapes me at the moment) and head up the stairs to decorate the area where the ceremony will be held.
Everybody gets to decorating, and Shanny holds up one of the items that will be displayed at the ceremony. It is a HUGE picture of Doug and Jackie embracing with the silver duct tape over each of their mouths in support of the No H8 Campaign (It’s a really cool photo. I want one – but not of THEM. I want one like that of MYSELF, of course. I mean, what in the hell would I do with a HUGE No H8 picture of Doug and Jackie Christie? Put it in my house? Ummm…NOT! I do not even KNOW them like that. Well, actually, I do not know them AT ALL.).
At a certain point, Jackie pulls her daughter Shanny aside and tells her she is SO happy that Shanny is there to celebrate and serve as her 1st Maid of Honor. Shanny tells her Mom that she thought about NOT coming but decided to do so anyway (I cannot tell if Shanny is JOKING or SERIOUS). Jackie gives her “a look,” and Shanny says she is only kidding (I still cannot tell whether she was kidding or not).
Shanny then asks her Mom where the other girls/bridesmaids are. Jackie interviews that she does not know if the girls are coming to the Rehearsal Dinner because they are late.
Finally, we see Malaysia and Bambi climbing the Club’s staircase to get to the 2nd floor, where the wedding is going to be held. Jackie looks relieved, and she greets them both with a hug. Malaysia interviews that she is “irritated” with Jackie.
At this point, Malaysia pulls Jackie aside and tells her that she wants to speak to her about something. She then just gets right to it and tells Jackie that she is offended that Jackie asked Bambi, who she basically JUST met, to be a bridesmaid in the wedding. Malaysia explains to Jackie that Jackie’s asking Malaysia to be a bridesmaid now seems “less important” because Jackie also asked someone she barely even knows to be a bridesmaid. She tells Jackie that this is just one of the many ways she feels that Jackie has been taking her and her friendship for granted.
Jackie tells Malaysia that she is “overjoyed” that Malaysia is there and is going to be one of her bridesmaids. Malaysia just looks at her. She interviews that she “just can’t be a FAKE B*TCH!!” Jackie then tells Malaysia that she “adores” her. Malaysia interviews that she HATES hearing Jackie say this because Jackie tells EVERYBODY she “adores” them. Jackie then tells Malaysia that she LOVES her. Malaysia looks skeptical, but she tells Jackie that she is glad that they were able to discuss the issue and get over it.
She interviews that she was happy that Jackie “got it” because it actually looked like she DID. She further interviews that this is Jackie’s 2nd strike, and “1 more strike and she is OUT!” She looks like she really means it too (Malaysia can be as sweet as sugar, but she is a STEEL hand in a VELVET glove. This is what I think causes people to underestimate her and, like Jackie, possibly take her for granted).
Next, we see Bambi and Malaysia in some type of room (I guess where they will be getting ready for the Rehearsal Dinner). Bambi asks Malaysia about her conversation with Jackie. Malaysia tells Bambi that it went well and that Jackie told her she “adored” her and “loved” her. After that, it was kind of hard for Malaysia to maintain her tough stance. Bambi & Malaysia both agree that Jackie is a person with whom one just CANNOT remain angry (I bet Draya would beg to differ).
Then they discuss whether or not Laura is even going to show up for the Rehearsal Dinner and the Wedding. Bambi interviews that she is not sure if she can be cool or be friends with someone like Laura based on their initial meetings/conversations.
She mentions something along these lines to Malaysia, and both of them agree that Laura went overboard speaking very negatively about Jackie the last time they got together (to pick out their bridesmaid’s outfits/costumes), and she particularly crossed a line when she said that she would not even really CARE if Jackie died (That WAS kinda cold, but….maybe Laura was just being HONEST. Shouldn’t she at least get a little credit for that? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe she should tell that to Jackie’s face. I doubt that Jackie would want her as a bridesmaid if she DID this, though. Then again, one never knows when it comes to Jackie Christie.).
Well, speak of the Devil, and SHE shall APPEAR! At this point, Laura arrives in the hotel room. Bambi and Malaysia basically tell her that she looks “rough.” She tells them that she JUST got off a plane, and she is super-tired.
Bambi then, without wasting ANY time, just gets right into telling Laura that she feels like Laura is the type of person who tries to “sneak-diss” people, particularly Bambi (Huh? When did THIS happen? This must have been a portion of an episode that got cut because I do not recall Laura doing this. Now, I do not put it PAST Laura. I just do not remember it).
Laura responds that she’s “just got jokes,” and Bambi may be taking some of her jokes too seriously. Bambi basically says, “Ummm, No! I don’t THINK so!” (What Bambi is REALLY saying, in very few words, is “Don’t try to play me like I am crazy, Laura!” And in the words of Closet Freak, she looks at Laura like she is thinking, “YOU’SE a SNEAKY BITCH!!”).
Laura interviews and says that she and Bambi “have maybe met 3 times!! Is she SERIOUS right now?!” (Ummm….Laura, that would be a “Yes!” Bambi looks like she is DEAD serious right now).
Laura tells Bambi that, in the future, she needs to point out to Laura when she thinks Laura is doing this “sneak-dissing” (I think this might be the new African-American/slang term for “passive-aggressive.” I JUST figured that out. For example, moving over to a whole other network and a whole other show, specifically “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” if Teresa and Kathy were African-American, when Kathy showed up at Teresa’s book signing and kept pointing to certain recipes in Teresa’s latest cookbook and saying, “My Momma’s recipe….My Momma’s….My Momma’s,” Teresa would have put her signing pen down; given Kathy a cold, hard look; rolled her eyes; sucked her teeth; and then said, “Look here, Kathy!! STOP trying to ‘sneak-diss’ me about my damned recipes!! No, those are not EVEN YO Momma’s pizzelles because my recipe calls for store-bought pizzelles to be used to make our Italian version of ice cream SAMMIDGES!! So, STOP trying to ‘sneak-diss’ my recipes and act like I copied them from YO damned Momma!! Kathy, YOU’SE a SNEAKY B*TCH, and get your sneak-dissing A*S outta here before I STAB you with my signing pen!!” End Scene. I cannot WAIT to start using my brand new African-American slang term!)
Laura then tells Bambi that she is the type of person to tell a person EXACTLY what she thinks to THEIR face, and she is not the type who really talks behind a person’s back (Laura is HALFWAY telling the truth. I’ve seen her straight-up tell Jackie some HARSH things. I have NEVER seen her tell Jackie that she would not give a damn if Jackie kicked the proverbial bucket, though. So, it’s 6 one way, ½ a dozen another, in my opinion.).
After their little conversation, Bambi interviews that, from this point on, she is cool with Laura (but she has a look on her face that says, “But ONE false move from that heifer, and she….is….going….DOWN!”).
Finally, it is the evening of Jackie and Doug’s 17th Wedding Ceremony/Celebration. There is even a Step & Repeat with photographers and everything. Brooke walks down the Step & Repeat and poses for the photographers. She is wearing the HELL out of a black dress (Thank God she stopped playing in her daughter’s closet and wore something that fit her properly. Maybe her fashion violation earlier in the episode was just a “one-off” and an unusual occurrence for her when it comes to clothing. If it is NOT, I am going to have to diagnose her with “Mariah Carey Disease,” which is when you STILL think you can fit into clothes that are 2-3 sizes too small. This is SERIOUS for me to say because I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Mariah Carey!! But I must speak the truth – even if it is a painful truth about my FAVORITE Diva. *Sigh*).
Next, we see Doug and Jackie arrive and get out of a bronze-colored Rolls Royce. Jackie, surprisingly, is dressed in a full-length white (Yes, WHITE!! I know she’s got 3 kids, but….Don’t ASK and never mind!!) wedding gown with a full-length veil. I say surprisingly because she was less dressed up for her 16th wedding last year AND because I thought she might have worn something a bit “edgier” since this wedding is going to take place in a gay club and is going to be a tribute to the LGBT Community. That wedding dress says nothing but “TRADITIONAL, TRADITIONAL, TRADITIONAL,” which is a bit unusual considering that they have been saying that they want their 17th Wedding to be edgy, fun and NON-traditional.
Doug, on the other hand, apparently got the memo, because he is wearing JEANS. Yes, I said JEANS – although they are a nice dark-almost black color. Along with his jeans, he is wearing a vest, a bright yellow cotton shirt and a bow tie.
In short, Doug and Jackie’s 17th Wedding ensembles do NOT match AT ALL. I think this is fitting, though, because I have been saying FROM THE BEGINNING of this show (since Season 1) that their 2 personalities are SO OPPOSITE that they do not “match” at all as a couple (He’s SANE. She’s NOT. He’s CALM. She’s NOT. He’s LEVEL-HEADED. She’s NOT. He’s EASYGOING AND RELAXED. She’s NOT. Well, you guys get my point. They DO say “Opposites Attract,” thought. That is DEFINITELY the case for Jackie and Doug Christie, and their outfits illustrate this.).
Next, we see a FABULOUS DRAG QUEEN walking and posing on the Step & Repeat (Sashay, Chante’!). Wait a minute! That’s not a drag queen. That’s LAURA!! Laura interviews that she did not tell ANYONE how she was going to be dressing as a bridesmaid. Because the wedding is supposed to be a tribute to the LGBT Community, she decided to dress as a “drag queen.”
I must say that she has DEFINITELY pulled it off. She actually looks better as a drag queen than a regular ol’ Woman. She should dress like this more often. She is wearing what can only be described as a bedazzled, bejeweled, colorful “leotard” with “cap sleeves” over sheer cream stockings and studded, super-high “hooker heels” (You just have to see it for yourselves).
To complete her “look,” Laura’s makeup is FLAWLESS (So she OBVIOUSLY did NOT have her makeup done by Lauren Manzo), and her hair is in a “fierce” updo (Me likey the whole “effect.” Good job, Laura! Totally appropriate for the venue and the theme!).
When Jackie and Doug see Laura on the Step & Repeat, they both gasp and say, “Oh my God!!” They are very pleased and impressed.
Next, we see Brooke standing around inside the wedding venue. She interviews that she and her fellow bridesmaid, Bambi, have unresolved issues, and the tension between them is “thick.” She further interviews that she wants to discuss things with Bambi, but she does not think THIS is the time or the place (I agree).
Finally, we see all of the bridesmaids assembled on raised level overlooking Doug and Jackie as they say their vows. Jackie interviews that the ceremony “engulfed [her] in love for Doug” (Aww! That’s sweet).
After they say their vows, the Officiant pronounce them “Husband and Wife” (AGAIN!), and Jackie and Doug then turn around and jump a decorated broom that is on the floor in front of them. Doug then kisses his “bride” (Aww!).
After this, the reception begins, and everybody starts partying. Jackie lifts up her wedding dress to show Doug a surprise: her gay pride tattoo (the same one that she got in the tattoo parlor where Draya met her and waited while she had it done. Draya described the tattoo as “some kind of weird, Illuminati, taste the rainbow symbol” that she did NOT understand AT ALL!). Doug tells Jackie he loves it!
Jackie interviews that this was a surprise to Doug because they had not been intimate for 30 days before their 17th Wedding. Malaysia interviews that Jackie’s “gay pride tattoo is CONFUSING!”
Laura interviews that the wedding and the reception were “GREAT!!” As she says this, she is shown dancing on top of a table with a man, wearing only a tiny pair of Speedos, bumping and grinding on her. At a certain point, she jumps off the table and stops dancing and just walks around. She interviews that she had to jump off the table because the dancer’s erection was poking her in the back (Damn! I didn’t get a good look at that dancer’s face. I wonder if Aviva’s father, George, works part-time as a dancer at this gay club. Oops!! Wrong show [George is a “back erection poker,” but he is on “The Real Housewives of New York!”] Sorry!).
We are shown further shots of everybody dancing and drinking and just having a gay ol’ time (No pun intended). At a certain point, all of the girls are sitting down in a curved booth. Jackie joins them. At this point, she has changed out of her wedding gown and into a T-shirt, some hot pants, and some high-heeled boots. As Jackie is just getting settled into the booth, Laura says, “Draya is here!!”
Jackie gets a look on her face that says, “What the EFF??!!” She interviews that when she heard that, her heart just STOPPED! Bambi interviews that Jackie’s reaction to Laura’s JOKE/LIE was “hilarious.” Laura tells Jackie that she is only kidding, and Jackie visibly relaxes.
Next, we see Laura, Brooke and Draya meeting for lunch. Laura interviews that they are all meeting up to discuss Jackie’s 17th Wedding. Laura tells Draya that she lied to Jackie and told her that Draya was at the wedding. She says that Jackie’s reaction was PRICELESS and made them all laugh. Draya laughs too.
Brooke then changes the subject and tells them that she is having a pool party for her birthday on Friday. She invites both of them to attend. Draya asks Brooke if she has invited Jackie. Brooke responds that she has not invited Jackie YET, but she plans to do so.
Draya gets a disgusted look on her face and tells Brooke that she really wishes Jackie would not be invited AT ALL. Brooke tells Draya that she is going to tell Jackie that if she CANNOT behave herself, then she should not even come to the party. She also assures Draya that she will instantly dismiss Jackie if Jackie tries to start any drama with Draya at the party. Draya does not look convinced.
Speaking of Jackie, she has scheduled manis and pedis for herself, Bambi and Malaysia. She interviews that this is her thank-you to them for being her bridesmaids. Bambi thanks Jackie for inviting her to be in the wedding. She then tells Jackie that she thinks Jackie and Doug “are the cutest couple.” She also tells Jackie that she met her daughter, Shanny, and she just “loves her!” (Wow! Bambi is being SUPER-SWEET! I guess she does have a softer side).
Bambi then mentions to Jackie that Shanny mentioned that she had recently moved away from home. Malaysia interviews that, like any young adult, she is sure that Jackie’s daughter wanted to get out on her own AND get a break from her Mom. She then says, “I don’t even LIVE with Jackie, and I need a break from her!”
All 3 of them then begin discussing Laura’s bridesmaid’s “outfit” (the drag queen ensemble). Bambi interviews that Laura is annoying, and she would have been pissed at that outfit if she would have been in Jackie’s position (I disagree with Bambi. I thought Laura was just trying to have fun and go with the “theme” of the wedding). I guess Bambi is still NOT quite jelling with Laura despite their talk that supposedly smoothed things over between them.
Jackie then brings up Brooke’s name. Malaysia tells Jackie that she likes Brooke. Bambi, on the other hand, says that she and Brooke still have “things” to work out.
Jackie then brings up Draya. She tells them that Draya thinks the world owes her something. She also says that if Draya comes at her wrong, she “is going to get HANDLED!” Jackie interviews that Draya needs to apologize to her (I think this is the 78th time Jackie has said this since the last episode, but I’m not quite sure).
Next, on another day, we see Brooke and Jackie walking down a sidewalk. Jackie interviews that she likes Brooke; however, Brooke’s friendship with Draya bothers her because she feels like Brooke’s loyalty is to DRAYA. Jackie brings Draya up to Brooke, and she tells Brooke that Draya does not seem open to hearing anything she would have to say to Draya right now. Brooke agrees and says, “No, not YET.”
Jackie then (AGAIN) tells Brooke that she feels like she and Brooke “are so much ALIKE.”
Jackie then brings up Bambi. Brooke tells Jackie that she and Bambi will NEVER be friends because Bambi told her that she had “no problem” with her, but since then, she has heard that Bambi “has talked crap” about her (That’s funny. Bambi says the SAME thing about Brooke. Are these really “mutual friends” chirping in their ears about each of their alleged smack-talk about the other…..OR is it really the Producers — who want to ramp up the drama between the two of them? I wonder.). Brooke further explains that Bambi is “now pissed because I blocked her on Twitter.” She does not see the big deal in blocking Bambi from her Twitter account (I don’t either, but I don’t tweet. So, I guess I just don’t get it. Maybe I WOULD get it if I DID tweet, but I do not care to tweet or to even get it because it all seems foolish to me).
Brooke then tells Jackie about the upcoming pool party she is having for her birthday, and she invites Jackie to attend. Just like Draya, Jackie IMMEDIATELY asks if Draya will be there. Brooke says, “Yes.” Jackie says she is cool with that, and she stresses that the issues between Draya and her are separate from her relationship with Brooke. Brooke agrees, but she then tells Jackie that, if the two of them start fighting, she will pull them apart and say, “No, Jackie, STOP!! I f*ck with Draya!!”
Jackie interviews that she found Brooke saying this to be “alarming”. She explains that this means that Brooke will “jump” her if anything goes down between her and Draya (Ummm….WHAT?! I do not think that is what Brooke meant at ALL, Jackie. I think she simply means that she is going to pull you off of Draya if the two of your start fighting because she is going to protect her girl, Draya. This does NOT mean that she is going to “jump” YOU! Oh, the mind of Jackie Christie! JEEZ!). Jackie further interviews that she will “stomp” Brooke if she tries this (Well, alrighty, then! Now that that’s settled….).
Malaysia and Bambi go shoe shopping. While they are in the shoe store, Malaysia asks Bambi what she thought of Jackie’s wedding. Bambi says she thought it was fun. Malaysia interviews that the wedding WAS nice, and she was very glad that there were NO fights.
Malaysia then gets a call from an “Unknown Number.” It turns out to be Brooke. She invites Malaysia to her birthday pool party. Malaysia tells Brooke it sounds like fun, and she asks Brooke if she can bring a guest. Brooke says “Yes.” She then asks Brooke if she HAS to wear a swimsuit. Brooke says, “No, casual wear is just fine. Wear whatever you want as long as you are comfortable.” Malaysia then asks Brooke if her “ex-boyfriend” will be there (I am a bit surprised at Malaysia for asking this. I mean, I know she is asking this because she plans to bring Bambi as her guest, but the Malaysia I know would be upfront and tell Brooke that the reason she is asking about Brooke’s ex-boyfriend being there is because she wants to bring Bambi as her guest. And Bambi and Brooke’s issues seem to all stem from this particular ex-boyfriend. Malaysia does not explain this to Brooke, though. I wonder if this is because the Producers told her not to do so or if she is just behaving uncharacteristically).
Brooke pauses, like she is a bit taken aback (I’m not surprised. I would have had the SAME reaction), before she tells Malaysia that her ex-boyfriend will NOT be there.
Bambi interviews that Brooke has a problem with her because Brooke’s ex-boyfriend used to buy her a bunch of gifts. She again says that she knew NOTHING about Brooke while she was benefiting from Brooke’s now-ex-boyfriend’s generosity.
Once Malaysia hangs up the phone, Bambi, who has overheard the entire phone conversation, tells Malaysia that she would be uncomfortable attending Brooke’s pool party as Malaysia’s guest. Malaysia tells Bambi that she is not used to Bambi “holding on to petty sh*t!”
Bambi interviews that she is “on the fence” with Brooke. She says she does not know if she is going to be friends with Brooke or NOT, but she is SICK of everyone pushing the issue (I get that, Bambi, but the 2 of you ARE on a television show together).
I am going to be honest and tell you that the next scenes I am about to describe could have, in my opinion, been left out of the episode entirely. They just seem like “filler” scenes to me, but here goes:
Next, we see Laura, Bambi, Malaysia and Draya walking on a beach. Bambi interviews that she is tagging along to a surprise Laura has planned for Malaysia. As they keep walking, they see some men near what look to be GIANT kites. It turns out that Laura has organized for them all to go hang gliding on the beach.
Laura agrees to go first. She interviews that she is adventurous so she’s “down for this!” She makes a valiant effort, but she does not seem to get that far off the ground (But what do I know? I’ve never BEEN hang gliding before).
Bambi goes next. She seems to get off the ground, but she failed to extend her feet when it was time to land, and she ended up falling on her knees when she stopped. She appears to be o.k., though.
Draya is up next. She interviews that “This is not a thing Black people do!! But you know me: I will try ANYTHING 10 times!!” She ends up doing it, and it looks like she does a good job. Once it is over, she says that it was “really fun!”
Malaysia goes last. She interviews that she went last because she needed time to “wrap her mind around it.” On her first attempt, she stopped running too quickly and ended up falling before she ever really got off the ground. On her 2nd attempt, she finally got off the ground, but she still kept running “while flying in the air.” She says it was a really good experience, but she felt like it was only “a warm-up.” She wants to do it again but from a HIGHER hill next time (Baby steps, Malaysia! Baby steps!).
After their hang gliding adventure, all of the women go out for lunch and drinks. Draya asks them about Jackie. They tell her she WILL be at Brooke’s party. Laura tells Draya that she definitely does NOT think things are settled between Draya and Jackie (No sh*t, “Captain Obvious”! I mean, the last time Draya and Jackie saw each other, they had to be held back from punching each other out.), but she advises Draya to just act nonchalant at the pool party and simply say, “Hey! What’s happening?” when she sees Jackie there.
Draya just looks at all of them and tells them that they are all bitches, and they laugh.
Gloria is back in town, and we see her and Laura arriving at Brooke’s pool party together. Gloria has on a bathing suit that is basically slit to down below her belly button (In short, her “girls” are on FULL DISPLAY!!). She interviews that she wants to know what she has missed since she has been out of town.
Once Gloria and Laura arrive, Brooke greets them. Gloria asks Brooke about the wedding, and Brooke tells Gloria that the wedding was “good.” Brooke then begins discussing Jackie with Gloria and Laura, and she says that “Jackie is like a leech. You can’t get rid of her.” (I agree, but where is THIS coming from, Brooke? The Producers MUST have cut out some scenes that indicate just WHY Brooke is saying this. She seemed to be cool with Jackie). Speaking of Jackie, while Brooke is saying this, Jackie is arriving and walking up behind her. Brooke instantly stops talking once she realizes this and greets Jackie.
Jackie interviews that she is apprehensive about the pool party considering that Draya will be there, and this will be their first time seeing each other since they almost physically fought each other.
Draya arrives next, and like Jackie, she interviews that she is “nervous.”
Everybody ends up sitting down around each other on some type of bench. Jackie, who arrived to the pool party wearing pumps, then inexplicably takes off her pumps and replaces them with a pair of high-top tennis shoes that she pulls out of her purse. Everyone, including Draya, looks at her oddly while she is doing this. Jackie interviews that she wants “to be prepared” (Oh Lord!!).
Upon seeing Jackie putting on her tennis shoes, Draya straight-up asks Jackie what she is about to do.
Laura and Bambi have a talk. Bambi tells Laura that she “needs to chill.” She then interviews that she “just CAN’T deal with FAKE B*TCHES!!”
While everyone is sitting in some type of diner, Jackie and Brooke get into it and start arguing. They then BOTH stand up and approach each other as if they are about to come to blows (AGAIN, Jackie!! I thought you said you and Brooke were “just ALIKE!!”).
Next, we see a door opening to some type of house that looks rather empty, and we then see Jackie sitting in a room of the house. She interviews that “they” are going to be surprised to see her (Who is “they”?).
Tuesday Night Lineup, October 23 (New Episodes) by BB
Tonight is the night Jenni gets married!!!!
8PM – DWTS All-Stars (ABC); NCIS (CBS); The Voice (NBC); Hart of Dixie (CW)(2 episodes); Raising Hope/Ben&Kate (Fox); Doomsday Preppers Bugged Out (Nat Geo); Holmes on Holmes (DIY); Giuliana and Bill (Style); Pretty Little Liars (Family); Into The Abyss (ID)
9PM – NCIS LA (CBS); Go On/The New Normal (NBC); Happy Endings/Don’t Trust the B (ABC); Emily Owens MD (CW); Abby’s Ultimate Dance Competition (Lifetime); 19 Kids and Counting (TLC); Face Off (SyFY); The Men Who Built America (History); New Girl/The X-Factor (Fox); Alaska The Last Frontier (Discovery); Property Virgins (HGTV); Hard Time (Nat Geo);
10PM – Flipping Out (Bravo); Vegas (CBS); Parenthood (NBC); Private Practice (ABC); Prank My Mom (Lifetime); Sons of Anarchy (FX); Covert Affairs (USA); Underemployed (MTV); House Hunters/HHInternational (HGTV); Extreme Cheapskates (TLC); Hot Set (SyFy); Ink Master (Spike); Chopped (Food); Taboo (Nat Geo); Chef Race U.K. Vs. U.S. (BBC); Chicagolicious (Style); Bait Car (Trutv); Oprah Where Are They Now (OWN)
11PM – WWHL; Jenni Pulos and Zoila Chavez