Dancing with the Stars by Lisette
Welcome back to the ballroom! The show starts off a group dance with all the pros (MAKS IS BACK!!!!) and then the pros are joined by their partners for mini solos. The song is the Pitbull song “Can’t stop the paarrtay” and the dance is rocking hot! This dance was choreographed by Lacy Schwimmer. I like that Lacy is still involved with DWTS but I like her as a pro and wish she was on this season.
This week’s theme is Side-by-Side. (ETA: The Side-by-Side is totally distracting and I think it solely exists to draaaaggggg out the time everyone dances so that this show can last two hours.) The stars will dance alongside a pro couple. I’m not sure how this will work out but onto the dancing…
Ingo & Kym – Cha Cha – Score 21
- CAI – 7
- LG – 7
- BT – 7
Ingo & Kym will be dancing alongside Tony & Emma. Ingo is having trouble with the hip movements for the cha cha. Dancing next to pros is a lot of pressure for Ingo. Onto the dance…First Tony & Emma take the stage and dance the cha cha I guess as a frame of reference so people can know what the dance should look like. Then I & K start dancing along the pros. Too many people on the dance floor. Too distracting and it only highlighted how stiff Ingo is. Then it is just Ingo & Kym and the dance is like going on forever! Kym has this big a** bow on her tush and it is all my eyes want to focus on…big bow moving up and down…its hypnotic. It’s going to be a long night because I’m already bored. I’m sure the youngin’s will bring it later. Len said he was good on the stamina but he has to work on his rhythm. Bruno said he plays the character well but it works to try to disguise the technical errors. Carrie Ann liked Ingo didn’t seem intimidated by the pros but he needs to work on his moves below the belt. That little comment started innuendos starting with Tom 🙂 Tom is so bad!
Jacoby & Karina – Jive – Score 26
- CAI – 9
- LG – 8
- BT – 9
Jacoby & Karina will be dancing with Maks & Anna Trubunskya. Looks like Maks and Karina are over their awkwardness from their broken engagement…LOL! So Jacoby wants to win the encore. He likes the jive because its like a dance from New Orleans called skip. Jacoby is having trouble with the dance because he feels Karina wants him to move like a woman and he can’s cause he’s all man…LOL! Enter Maks and Anna and Jacoby likes Maks (who doesn’t) because Maks can show him how to move like a man. Onto the dance…*Sigh* makes is missed. Ok now this is better! I LOVE JACOBY! Man this man has some great energy! And for such a tall person he has some moves! The dance was great, lively and entertaining. Jacoby is getting some of my votes this week. He was awesome! Bruno is out of his chair. Bruno said it was like watching two stallions at the peak of their power fighting for supremacy. Masculinity and testosterone pouring out of everywhere. His one criticism was for Jacoby to point his feet on the kicks and flicks. Carrie Ann agrees with the toe point comment and then goes I love me some Jacoby! Me too! And Jacoby goes Girl I love you back! LOL! Len said Jacoby lights up the place but he will not get a 9 from Len with those feet and Jacoby responds Hey Len I love you but with this feet I went 108 and 7 seconds. I guess he’s referencing his stamina.
Victor & Lindsay – Viennese Waltz – Score 21
- CAI – 7
- LG – 7
- BT – 7
This dance is proving hard for Victor and he’s snapping at Lindsay. It comes out that a woman Victor was dating was stepping out on him and he found out during the practice. He left practice to work out his frustration and came back with renewed focus. They are dancing with Tristan (yeah!) and Emma (again?). The men seem to work better with the other male pros. Interesting. Onto the dance…It’s a fast tempo waltz, nice. Victor’s stiffness helps him a bit in the waltz but he’s struggling. Its a better effort but you can see Lindsay is doing all the work. Carrie Ann called it a victory. Said it was graceful from him and she called him out on the lift. Len said it was better than last week and well done. Len also called out Carrie Ann on her insistence on calling out lifts that aren’t intentional. This is the second time Len has snapped at Carrie Ann tonight…hmmm…Bruno said he was back in the game. He was elegant, pert and erect (more innuendo) with Bruno shocked at the gasps and he goes what he had to be that way for his posture in the dance…LOL! Bruno!
Alexandra & Mark – Samba – Score 25
- CAI – 8
- LG – 8
- BT – 9
Aly & Mark are dancing with Tony and Whitney. Aly is benefiting from having Whitney dancing with them. Again the stars work better when they can see how they are supposed to look. Aly goes although Mark does make a good lady sometimes…cue up Mark dancing like a lady…LOL! Aly is releasing her inner sex kitten…LOOK OUT! Aly was fantastic! She finally seemed to be having some fun and she moved so well in this dance. Really good! Len said her bottom was the tops! She kept up with the pros (I agree) and he had a little criticism on some mistakes she made and something about the synchronized runs but other than that good job! Bruno called her sassy and saucy! He said she had strong technique apart from the mistake and she has a carefree attitude now that allows her to care about the dancing and it shows. Carrie Ann called her a sex kitten. She said she was great when she was dancing with Whitney but once she realized Whitney wasn’t there anymore Aly took it down a notch and she should really keep it up and not take it down. Aly makes the first mention of the night to Boston. She dedicated her dance to those in Boston hurt in the marathon.
Sean & Peta – Quick Step – Score 24
- CAI – 8
- LG – 8
- BT – 8
Obligatory shot of Sean and the fiance so that we believe they are still together and happy. They are dancing with Tristan and Chelsie. Sean is trying to be like Tristan and he’s mimicking everything Tristan does. I guess this is supposed to be cute. Sorry I don’t like this guy. The dance was good. Peta’s costume and hair was very distracting. Bruno has a shocked look on his face. He’s like Sean what is going on?! Bruno said he had a lumberjack style clonking around and tonight he turned into a swan with elegance and grace. Carrie Ann says he’s back and it was bold and beautiful. She loved it! Len said last week a statue this week a pigeon. Everyone is confused if it was a complement or diss. Len is like I’m not explaining it. Bruno called him a swan and I said pigeon same diff…LOL! Len said it was his best dance yet.
Kellie & Derek – Foxtrot – Score 27
- CAI – 9
- LG – 9
- BT – 9
This is their first ballroom dance of the season and they are both nervous about it. This dance is not playing to Kellie’s strengths and Derek is showing his short fuse. They are dancing next to Henry and Anna. Kellie is wearing a very distracting wig. It’s so cheap looking it belongs on Kim Zolciak’s head Season 1. The dance was really good. Nice and smooth. Carrie Ann is complementing Len first by saying she likes the side-by-side challenge. She says each couple is benefiting from dancing with the pros. She liked the dance and pointed out one error but overall really good. Len said that was a hot trot not a foxtrot, he’s telling you. He said Kellie put the oo in smooth. He said if she keeps dancing like that she’s in the final. Bruno says she managed to have the glamor and humor of Jean Harlow and the sophistication of the Great Gatsby. Baz Luhrman would use this.
DL & Cheryl – Tango – Score 18
- CAI – 6
- LG – 6
- BT – 6
Scenes of DL & Cheryl disagreeing. DL is connecting through the hips with Cheryl in the wrong way and its grossing her out. Its funnier than it sounds. They are dancing with Sascha (male Sascha) and Chelsie. DL likes having Sascha there to show him how to dance. DL looks good but he looks like he’s stomping his way through the dance. It is a definite improvement. Len said it was like a decaf coffee. It didn’t have any snap. It lacked the attack needed for the tango. Bruno said he did attack it but it came out like a stamping monster. Called it a brave attempt. Carrie Ann loved his intensity and focus but side by side she could see he was bouncy and he should have been smooth. DL responded you saw a difference when we were side by side. Was it the hair that looked different? LOL!!
Zendaya & Val – Argentine Tango – Score 29
- CAI – 10 – First 10s of the season!
- LG – 9
- BT – 10
Zendaya & Val are dancing with Maks and Anna. Val has never danced the Argentine Tango before…HUH?! Zendaya is having a hard time with the sensuality of the dance. Thank God considering she’s 16!! This dance did not disappoint! The Argentine Tango is my favorite dance to see and this one was one of the all time best! Maks and Anna starting it off and then Zendaya & Val coming in to seal the deal. Zendaya has these great leg extensions that makes it fun to watch her dance. Their tango was a little muted but it worked for me because I just can’t forget she’s quite young for this dance of passion. Bruno is out of his chair (I swear one day he will flip over the desk!) and called her the lethal beauty. The ultimate femme fatale. He said next to Anna she was as good and strong. Carrie Ann mentioned that Zendaya is so tall and that her thighs must be killing her but you could never tell. Carrie Ann says she loves that every move she makes has a story and its like watching stylized life working and she loves it. Len says it was like a lemon tart, sharp and tangy at the top crisp and tasty down below. Well done it was a gem of a dance. Val also mentions Boston and says it is hard to do a show like this in a time like this.
Next week is Stevie Wonder night so if your a Wonder fan make sure to tune in!
Andy & Sharna – Paso Doble – Score 18
- CAI – 6
- LG – 6
- BT – 6
Andy doesn’t think he can do machismo to pull off the paso. Andy & Sharna will be dancing with Sacha and Emma (she’s a busy girl tonight). Andy comes flying in on a hire wire. He’s Zorro. A good effort but Andy cannot pull off serious. He had some mistakes but overall a good effort. Carrie Ann is laughing and she loved the entrance. Said the dance fell apart after the cape thing. Len said it was more Pasadena than Paso Doble. As always great fun and he enjoyed watching it. Bruno said it was indescribable. The cape work was bad and the only thing missing was Cloris Leachman. Audience is silent then boos. Tom goes one comment too many again. I agree.
Zendaya & Val are at the top of the leader board and at the bottom are DL & Cheryl and Andy & Sharna.
Dukes of Melrose by Jill
How perfect that Cameron is at his most sharp tonged while wearing a cape? And the award for best dramatic performance goes to……drum roll.
Decades’ is having growing pains that any successful business combining staff will suffer. After terse comments fly the wounded each go to their corners to collect themselves. Sweet Billy cannot take the demands from Cameron any longer. It sparked his of character remark and we can see he is frayed. Cameron, I’m speaking to you here, NO ONE puts Billy in a corner!! No One! Every show needs the quiet wit of a Billy and Cristo’s is there to soften the blow and try to mend the Gucci Prada Pucci fence dividing the two. The kerfuffle is over staff RSVP’s for Cameron’s upcoming event honoring model and icon Peggy Moffitt. Muse for the late fashion designer Rudi Gernreich and fashion icon her images still resonate and the outfits are art. Cameron is feeling just as stressed with everything he has in the air with the event, styling, and well just being Cameron that his is 100% unwilling to budge ad holds firm that it is Billy who owes HIM and apology.
Fighting aside there are still closets to raid and getting to tag along with Cristos is one of my favorite things. Sneaking a peak into the lux closet of Candy Demann does not disappoint. It does start of with so many NO’s, McQueen NO, Fendi NO, worried Cristos rolling case will leave empty, his breath is held when he uncovers a Prada bag. This is a PERFECT bag for anyone and much to my wondering ears, Candy says yes setting the Decades shelves buzzing anticipating new arrivals! Lavin dress? Check. Pink Lacrox dress worn to Madonna’s wedding in the 80’s? CHECK AND CHECK! Designer pieces and some wine make for a wonderful closet-shopping spree for Cristos.
We can not call it a night just yet because the Gernreich exhibit is opening it’s doors. Peggy Moffitt arrives looking amazing. Just take a look. Chic from head to toe she is awed by the exhibit. I was as well. The color, the cuts, the art in each piece make the viewer long to reach out and not only touch the dress’ and jump suits but try them on and take a blast straight back to the Laugh In set. With the evening at a close, it’s back to the Decades grindstone in the morning. FYI: The grindstone at Decades is covered in fur.
Billy choses the best path to harmony and agrees along with Cameron, they agree to work on their relationship moving forward. Thanks Cameron because we need our Billy fix on the show. No show is complete with out a touch of snark delivered with ease and some stylish leather gloves.
The Amazing Race – April 14, 2013 – by MelTheHound
- Idries and Jamil Abdur-Rahman Eliminated in leg 2
- Max and Katie Bichler are newlyweds from Buffalo, N.Y. It’s wrong to judge a book by it’s cover, I know that but I’m looking at this guy and already I’m thinking douche bag. Hopefully, I’m wrong.
- Mona Egender and Beth Bandimere (Derby Moms) are mothers from Colorado. They are also roller derby teammates. I tend to like the Roller Derby Queens.
- Bates and Anthony Battaglia (Hockey Brothers) are brothers from Raleigh, N.C. The brothers are professional hockey players.
- Chuck and Wynona McCall (Alabama) are a married couple from Daphne, Ala. Chuck is a taxidermist and his wife is a hairstylist. Here is a couple who look exactly like who they are to me. I saw her and the first two words out of my mouth were Wynona Judd.
- David and Connor O’Leary (Utah) Took themselves out of the race due to an injury
- Caroline Cutbirth and Jennifer Kuhle are friends and (Country Singers) in a band. Caroline is a direct descendant of Daniel Boone and Jennifer is the granddaughter of John Wayne. Never heard of either of these ladies.
- Joey Graceffa and Meghan Camarena (YouTubers) are friends from Los Angeles. They list their occupation as YouTube hosts. Dude, wash the shit out of your hair and drag a comb through it.
- Pamela Chien and Winnie Sung (Besties) Eliminated leg 7.
- Jessica Hoel and John Erck (Surfers) Eliminated Leg 4 holding an express pass… Dumbass.
You can read more about them here… There you have it my friends. The cast that will or won’t entertain us for the next couple months. Each of those cast member links should take you to the CBS website where the photos are hosted.
Leg 8 – Bern, Switzerland – My Cheese Is Out Of Control.
Welcome back race fans. It’s been a couple weeks and a day, I hope you didn’t forget about me. When we last met, Besties were eliminated and we were down to six teams. Hockey brothers won that leg and will be the first to depart The Royal Tree Lodge in Botswanna, South Africa. They are to get on a plane to Zurich, Switzerland. Once there, they have to find ‘The Conductor’ who will hand them their next clue. They leave the lodge to go to the Time Travel travel agency. Guess what kiddies, everyone will be on the same flight so it doesn’t matter who left first. Everyone gets on the plane, no one is left behind in South Africa.
One they land, they find the conductor and the clue is, they have to got to Grindelwald by train and wait for their next clue. This is a multiple connection train ride and everyone makes it on to the first train. On the train, there is some flirting going on between the Hockey brothers and the Country singers. Cute. They arrive at the Bern train station where they have to make a connection. Derby moms and Youtube both miss that connection, by about 3 seconds. RuhRoh.. As the train was pulling away, the 4 teams on the train gave a gleeful smile and wave to the women standing on the platform. Not to worry folks, there’s another train in a half hour. Further, once they get to Grindelwald, they have to wait until the next morning to get their next clue anyway. So, twice, the teams are all equalized.
The following day, the teams head back to that church to wait for some guy, a snow shepherd to come sliding down the hill on his slide/bike. Everyone is in good spirits except for Chuck who has begun the day being a dick to his wife. She isn’t moving fast enough for his satisfaction (Chuck, dude, you knew the woman couldn’t run when you began this race, suck it up and deal with it). She promises him that if he ‘starts’ again, there will be hell to pay. I’ve kind of developed a soft spot for Wynona but Chuck, is an ass. They arrive at the church, just like everyone else and get their clue when the guy arrives. The clue is, they have to get to Kleine, by train, where they will pick up a travel companion and once again the race is on to catch the train, at 9:47. Ole Chuck is complaining to his wife the entire route from the church to the train. “How can these other girls be so much faster than you” he says. Chuck, have you seen your wife? I don’t want to be mean, but just sayin’. Everyone arrives at the train station, at around 9am but Alabama is behind them by 12 seconds. She timed it (and now she’s pissed at him). Did she have a stopwatch or was she counting one thousands? He tells her to sit her ass on the floor while he figures out how to purchase the same ticket everyone else has. She’s upset crying that she’s a disappointment to him and she hates it. Really? I’m going to point out here, for future reference, that every mistake made on this race by this team, has been made by Chuck. Just sayin’
All of the teams are on the train so Chuck can relax but I’ve seen, on women, that look that is on Wynona’s face before. She is going to hang his balls by the trailer hitch on her truck when they get back to Alabama. The train ride up the mountain is a pretty one and most seem to be enjoying it. They get to the end of the ride and pick up their travel companions. They are to deliver these pups, by train at the Jungfraujoch station, to the waiting rescue guides and then search the ‘sphinx’ to get their next clue. This train station boasts the highest elevation in Europe, at over 11,000 feet. Most get to and on the train without incident but Country’s dog, Kara, wants no part of that train. Their alliance with Hockey comes in handy though because one of them helps wrestle the dog on to the train steps where she finally gets the hint to get on the train. On the train, everyone is loving on their dogs as they are missing their own dogs back home. Including Chuck. He’s treating the dog better than he is his wife because she can probably run faster. Way to motivate her Chuck ole boy. They get to the station and begin to run to deliver the dogs to the rescue guides. Everyone except Wynona that is.. At 11k feet, the air is very thin, and she’s feeling a bit dizzy but Chuck wants to pull her along. In the end, everyone gets their dogs delivered and they can now go and get their next clue.
It’s a roadblock. One member from each team has to crawl out the lookout window and walk a plank to pick up one of those travelocity gnomes to get the next clue (it’s printed on the bottom of the gnome. Then continue on across the plank to the next window. That is the north face of ‘The Eiger’ they are walking across (harnessed and attached to a guide rope). Bates, Beth, Katie, Megan, Jennifer, and, you guessed it, Wynona do this task. She is the only one who really has any difficulty. I think she got hung up on the guide rope or something like that but she did manage to complete it. Out there on that plank, she didn’t have much choice. That is Bates (Hockey) that I’m showing in the pics.
The clue says they have to go to the Grindewald Grund train station, cross a bridge, and follow the sound of the swiss alp horn to get their next clue. 4 teams catch the first train out of there but since Wynona is having trouble, and Mehgan must wait until she finishes before she can begin, those two teams miss that first train. For the first time in the episode, the teams aren’t on an even footing. Wynona finishes the boardwalk but now, they and Youtube will be a half hour behind the other teams. While waiting for the train, Chuck says “…. I wish you could have moved … ” and I think Wynona is about to knock his head off. He’s complaining that the other girls did it in like 2 seconds. Really Chuck? My bet is you would have fallen off of that plank and I would have laughed my ass off. In the end, just like everyone else, these two teams get on the train and are moving along.
The other 4 teams get to the station, cross the bridge, and the alp horn guy gives them their clue. It says, “Follow the marked path and join the local workforce”. The task is, they have to deliver 4, 50 pound hunks of cheese (Swiss cheese?) from one place where it’s stored to another place. In order to do this, they have to each drag a sled up the hill, and then use the sled to transport the cheese down the hill and then deliver the cheese. Once they do that, they get their next clue. The mode of transportation is very important here. It Must go down the hill on the sled. Hockey gets to the hill first, there is a rope for them to help climb the hill. These two make pretty short work of it. I’m guessing they have proper all terrain shoes on or something like that. Newlyweds, on the other hand, are wearing shoes that don’t have any tread on them. Max called them racing slicks. That means, Katie, being in front of the pack of they, Derby, and Country, is holding up the line because she can’t get any traction. They all make it up though, load their sleds with 2 blocks of cheese each, and then let the sled push them down the hill. The cheese falls off for everyone and they have to reload it several times but they all get it done. I’m sure there’s a science to this, they just don’t know what it is. Looked like a fun ride down though. Hockey completes the task first and are on their way to the pit stop. Newlyweds finish second, Derby moms are next, and Country finishes fourth. Probably because they had better shoes for running in snow, Derby moms beat the Newlyweds to the pit stop (We’ll get to that in a minute).
Enter Alabama and Youtube. As they are going to meet the horn guy for their clue, the others are leaving for the taxis to go to the pit stop. They are informed that this one is a hard one. RuhRoh… Youtube seems pretty capable of doing it but I’ll say this again… Listening to Joey scream like a 5 year old girl really makes my skin crawl. While the two of them are sliding down the hill, Chuck is trying every method possible to push and pull Wynona up that hill. Eventually, they get there. He doesn’t miss the opportunity to tell his wife, several times, that she ‘sucks’ at this challenge. Now, Remember earlier, I said that every mistake made in this race by Alabama was made by Chuck? I think rednecks all over the country are hanging their heads in shame. Look at the picture of how Chuck is loading the cheese on to the sleds… He’s succeeded in turning those sleds into 125 pound snow plows (I’m guessing at the weight of the sleds, the cheese wheels are each 50 pounds, 2 per sled). They will not slide down the hill like that so Wynona decides to Roll the cheese down the hill. In other words, just let it go by itself. Remember too, that the use of the sleds was very important. They manage to get the cheese delivered and in their minds, that was the main task so they proceed to the pit stop.
Now, the pit stop is at a family type resort and they are all looking for “The Bodmi Snowboard and Ski School”. The previous four teams all took taxis. Youtube, somehow ends up walking/running, they couldn’t find a cab. Alabama did find the cabs and actually beat them to the pit stop. We see Mehgan having some trouble on this road hike, they don’t appear to have a clue of what they are doing. They know they’ve probably slipped from 5th place to 6th place. Hold that thought kids. Alabama checks in 5th, or so they think, then they are hit with the news that since they didn’t use the sleds to take the cheese wheels down the hill, they have to wait out a 30 minute penalty. That is enough time for Youtube to complete the walk and slip in to that spot and remain in the race. I say this is Chuck’s fault because at the top of the hill, he didn’t seem to know how to properly use the sleds, leading to Wynona’s decision to roll the cheese down. They must have figured it out because when they were taking the cheese to the barn, they had the sleds upright and pulling them properly.
So there you have it. We’ve seen the last of Alabama on this race and those of you in that fine state, if you see a slightly robust blonde hairdresser driving a truck with a pair of balls hanging from the trailer hitch, it may be a safe bet that they once belonged to Chuck. At the end of the leg, the order is, Hockey (won a trip to BoraBora, third win), Derby moms (I’m still liking these two for a win), Newlyweds (whatever), Country Singers (these two are just having the time of their lives. Love the attitude on these two), and Youtube (somehow with all of their mistakes and such, they’re still hanging in. If it wasn’t for his girlie scream, I might actually like this team. I like Mehgan but…. well.. ’nuff said).
Wynona and Chuck have been married 24 years and have a lot of married life and stuff behind them. He says the race didn’t tear them apart (but I’ll bet he slept in the snow that night).. They are glad they had the chance to do the race because they have been to places they never could have afforded otherwise. I like that attitude about it but it would be nice if he wasn’t such a dick about it at times. Wynona, btw, said nothing in the exit interview that we were shown. Not verbally anyway.
See you next week. Peace, MTH aka WTFIJeff
Tuesday Night Lineup, April 16th, by BB
8PM – The Voice (NBC); Hart of Dixie (CW); Splash (ABC); Hell’s Kitchen (Fox); In Performance at the White House (PBS); Deadliest Catch: The Bait (Disc); Holmes Inspection (DIY); The Bad Girls Club: Atlanta (Oxygen); Eat St. (Cook)
9PM – Don’t Be Tardy (Bravo); Dancing with the Stars (ABC); Ready for Love (NBC); Dance Moms (Lifetime); Income Property (HGTV); Storage Wars (A&E); 19 Kids and Counting (TLC); Deadliest Catch (Disc); Hardcore Pawn (truTV); Counting Cars (History); The 80’s (NatGeo); Nightmare Next Door (ID); I Hate My Kitchen (9:30 DIY); Find Me My Man (Oxygen)
10PM – The Kandi Factory (Bravo); Golden Boy (CBS); Preachers’ Daughters (Lifetime); Awkward (MTV); House Hunters (HGTV); American Hoggers (A&E); Deadliest Catch (Disc); The Game/Let’s Stay Together (BET); Robot Combat League (SyFy); Who Gets the Last Laugh? (TBS); World’s Worst Tenants/Urban Tarzan (Spike); American Restoration (History); Chopped (Food); The 80’s (NatGeo); Dead of Night (ID); The Bad Girls Club (Oxygen); What!? (Logo)
11PM – WWHL: Harvey Fierstein and Kim Zolciak (Bravo)