Give me Some Attention Pleeze – Bravo CelebrityWhores by NMD
Let’s start with a blog favorite – Brandi Glanville. I predict Brandi will no longer be a blog favorite after Season 4 of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs. Yes I know it just started taping, but even with my high tolerance for the Bravo ladies, I’ve already had enough of Brandi. She just never stops. The latest two thing are
1) This tweet: “I’ve been trying to get a hold of my kids 4 over an hour no response to my calls ,emails or messages. Maybe twitter will work
@EddieCibrian” Really Brandi – twitter??? Not even a DM on twitter??? Can you TRY to leave the kids out of it??? I’m really tired of you saying “I’m a great mother,” as a shield. A great mother doesn’t embarrass her kids. I don’t care how evil LeAnn Rimes is – Brandi is her own person and needs to control her own behavior.
2) This article. (If it’s true) says that Brandi and Lisa confronted Kyle on camera to prove to her that Mauricio is cheating. We had a discussion about tired old storylines a few days ago, and someone mentioned leaking secrets. Well here we go – I guess all the secrets are now fair game on this show. There is a saying – “Don’t blame the messenger.” Well if the messenger outs your secret on national TV it’s probably fair to blame them. Kyle Richards does not strike me as a stupid woman. If Mauricio is cheating she probably knows. No one needs to throw it in her face.
Then there is the ODD Bachelorette Party of Tamra Barney’s. Nevermind that she’s had at least two public bachelorette parties, this third one is just a cry for attention. Check out this photo of Eddie, and read the caption, “Eddie had a big surprise for his future bride: He wore chains and added extra excitement to his look by using a shirt and towel to “fill out his bathing suit,” laughs an eyewitness.”
Ugh. Why are they determined to make us think Eddie is lacking in a certain department. But Tamra’s biggest move was NOT inviting BFF Gretchen Rossi to the event. The only housewife in attendance to the classy affair was Heather Dubrow. Gretchen tweeted her little heart out when she found out she was left off the invite list. Poor dear. She didn’t make the cut in Tamra’s exclusive list of friends to party with in Vegas. Meanwhile Heather tweeted she was honored to be asked and added the hashtag #bridesmaid.
And finally my personal least favorite of all the housewife hanger-ons and misfits. Thomas Kramer – who was featured on Real Housewives of Atlanta as Kim Zolciak’s friend, and Real Housewives of Miami as friends of Lea Black and many of the others. This article is long but so very much worth the read as it dives deep into the rise and fall of this horrible man. Mood swings, shady deals, rape allegations, lust to be on a reality show, and insistence on filming his facelife (performed by Lenny Hochstein) are all chronicled by the author, who was hired to help write his memoirs. Ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh. That’s five ugh’s for Thomas Kramer.
Newlyweds: The First Year Episode 3 (with a horrible flashback) by BB
Tarzina (Tarz and Tina):
Tina is almost 35 and she’s not getting any younger. She and Tarz look at the pregnancy pee stick and it’s negative. Tarz is surprised and Tina says they need to go to the doctor to see what’s wrong with him.
In their small NY apartment, Tina is working on a new song and wants Tarz to hear it so she interrupts him while he’s on his laptop (when is he not on his laptop?). He asks her if he can hear the song later. Tina has traveled and worked since she was very young and she’s not used to being in one place for long periods of time. Since Tarz is not into her song, she goes out to meet her friend and choreographer Ryan for lunch. They discuss Tina’s plans to back off of her career and work on becoming a mom. Ryan asks Tina if she’s going to be happy following Tarz around for the next year. He thinks she’s going to be totally bored. Ryan is not telling Tina what she wants to hear, that everything’s going to be great for the next year.
Tarz surprises Tina for Valentine’s Day. She thinks she’s meeting him at his friend’s apartment for drinks before they go out. It turns out he has hired their wedding caterer to cook for them. His friend’s office (not apartment) has been over the top decorated in Tina’s favorite color blue. Tina keeps kissing and thanking Tarz and he just wants to eat. Later they go dancing and Tina can’t remember the last time they went out and had fun like that. Three hours later, they are in bed. Tarz is clicking away on his laptop and Tina’s left on her own to go to sleep while giving him a secret dirty look. I don’t think it’s the romantic ending Tina had envisioned.
Kathryn and Jon
Kathryn is by herself in the bathroom and her pregnancy test comes up positive. She becomes very emotional and needs to call someone; her sister, oh wait, John. When John sees the positive tests (because she took more than one to be sure) he wants to text everybody. Kathryn tells him they need to wait until she’s three months before they tell anybody.
Later, Kathryn and John’s sister Ellen are talking about John spilling the beans to everyone and how that wasn’t a smart thing to do, especially since her pregnancy hasn’t even been confirmed by a doctor. Ellen then feels the need to tell Kathryn about her friend who recently had a miscarriage. Kathryn doesn’t want to hear it and asks her why she would want to tell a pregnant woman that. Kathryn then wonders out loud if she’s truly pregnant because she’s been on the HGC diet (eating certain foods and taking a homeopathic chemical that shows up in pregnant women). Then, Kathryn says she’s positive she’s pregnant and she’s crying because she doesn’t want her sister-in-law to talk about miscarriages and looking up HGC online. She’s upset about John telling everybody so early. She’s freaking out. She storms out of the room saying this should be the happiest time in her life. If she’s not pregnant, then she’s one of the most dramatic people I’ve ever seen.
On Valentine’s day, Kathryn and her friend Lyndsey go shopping for a nice outfit while John stays home making brownies to surprise her. He has to call his sister for instructions. He uses olive oil instead of vegetable oil and can’t understand why he has to use an egg. He has to google to see how to spell valentine so he can write in on the brownies. Meanwhile Kathryn is already outgrowing her clothes and she’s not having much luck finding something to wear that night. She finally finds something she feels comfortable in and has to call John to get her purchase “authorized” by him. He half-heartedly gives her a hard time about the amount the outfit costs and wants to know if shoes are included. He tells us his wife is blowing up like a balloon and seems to be OK with it.
Later that night John surprises Kathryn with his brownies, the first thing he’s ever made in his life. Because she’s pregnant, he does the non-sexy thing by having something to eat instead of the sexy outfit and going upstairs routine. The brownies are not that good, but at least he tried and Kathryn acts appreciative that he went to all the trouble.
When Kathryn and John are in bed later that night, John asks Kathryn to rub his bloated tummy like his mom used to do. Kathryn says what a way to end Valentines day as newlyweds. John heads off to the bathroom and Kathryn tells him she’ll probably be asleep when he gets back.
Jeff and Blair.
Blair receives texts from almost everyone he knows with the news that Whitney Houston has died. Based on Blair’s reaction, Jeff thinks something must have happened to someone in Blair’s family. Blair says he did not overreact. Everyone knows Whitney Houston was Blair’s idol. That is the difference between Jeff and Blair; Blair is a drama queen and Jeff doesn’t show his feelings. Blair is hurt that Jeff thinks he overreacted.
Blair chastises Jeff for gardening in a nice shirt and tells him to put on a T-shirt. Their commitment ceremony is coming up and Blair’s mom has fed-exed Jeff’s mom’s RSVP to the wedding because she thinks Jeff should read it personally. He opens the invitation. It has a written apology for not responding on time and hopes they are having a great time. Then Jeff sees that the “No” box is marked. Jeff is not surprised. His parents have never told Jeff they love him, they are disconnected from him. Jeff says nothing ventured, nothing gained. He doesn’t think his parents see how not coming affects him or they just don’t care.
It’s Valentine’s Day and Jeff and Blair visit The Center to talk to some young people who are gay about their experience of being in love. Jeff is clearly uncomfortable talking to them and stumbles over his words. Blair is in his element and tries to make it better by asking Jeff to tell them about when and how he came out (when he was 35 and it didn’t go well and still isn’t going well). He still doesn’t feel comfortable holding hands with Blair in public. One of the young people talks about how it freaked his mom out at first when he came out, but now she supports him totally. Another girl talks about how her mom wanted to make a dental dam (girl condom) with saran wrap. Jeff and Blair don’t really get it. Another guy tells them they seem to be really in love and it inspires him to have the same thing one day.
Later, Blair takes Jeff for a romantic gondola ride. The gondolier tells them when they go under the bridge they must smooch for good luck. They do and someone on shore yells at them that it was the longest kiss ever.
Blair, who used to be in a boy band, is in the studio preparing a special song for the upcoming commitment ceremony. So sweet.
Later that night, Jeff and Blair are in bed all kissy and smoochy. Jeff tells Blair their gondola ride was “romantical” and that he has a surprise for Blair. He brings out some saran wrap. They put it between their lips while they kiss and Jeff says “now that’s safe sex.”
Alaska and Kim
Alaska is in LA, Kim is in NY. They already feel like they spend too much time apart. Kim is at lunch with her dad, Wayne. Kim gets fish with mac and cheese and greens and then wants to know if her dad wants to share some yams. Let me guess, they’re in a soul food or southern cuisine restaurant. Kim’s dad is more like a best friend to her than her dad. Kim confides that her fairy tale dreams of marriage are not turning out like she thought they would. Kim thinks she’ll feel all alone if she moves out to LA because all of her friends are in NY. Her dad thinks he compromised too much in his marriage to Kim’s mom. Kim wants for Alaska to be the leader in their marriage, but her dad doesn’t think Kim should always be playing second fiddle to Alaska. He will get too used to it. He advises Kim to lock down having an apartment in NY to come back to before moving to LA. Oh, the restaurant is Miss Mamie’s Spoonbread Too, Authentic Southern Cuisine. Definitely my kind of place.
Alaska finally agrees to lease the apartment Kim likes so much in NY. Kim and a couple of her friends are at the apartment and she tells Alaska, who is still in LA, she has a plan for the vintage sofa. Alaska says he’s not going to use “that thing.” Kim and her friends go furniture shopping and try to find something red because Alaska wants red in the house. Kim calls Alaska to tell him she sees a desk she likes and it costs $690. He says no way he’s paying that much for a desk. He’s cramping Kim’s style big time and she’s not having any fun shopping.
While Kim and her friends are out shopping, they stop by the mecca of fabric, Zarin Fabrics, and when entering, Kim declares she loves Jill Zarin. Kim is looking for some mosaic patterned fabric to cover her tufted sofa. She finds something she likes and shows it to Alaska. He informs her the tufted couch will not being going in the living room, and Kim tells him yes it is and he will see when he gets home.
Alaska is back in NY to help Kim move. He tells her he’s on a time limit and has to go back to LA because he has to make money. They are not getting along during the packing up. Alaska is being an azz and says he fights to win the way his father did, even though he’s a sweetheart compared to how his dad used to be. He later realizes he’s married now and apologizes to Kim about how he’s been acting towards her. They end up on the rooftop together to say goodbye to the Bronx.
I’m still enjoying this show. Who knew?
Dancing with the Stars Finale by Lisette
Welcome to the grand finale (and super-sized two hours) of Dancing with the Stars season 16! Who will be crowned tonight? Let’s begin!
First of many montages for tonight. “10 weeks ago the story began. 12 stars hoping for success. One by one they fell. But tonight the final 4 take to the floor for one last dance. They’ll discover if they’ve done enough to triumph.” All 12 pros from this season get the party started with the new Pitbull anthem “Don’t stop the parrrtttyy!” All of the previous contestants and the final four are danced in. So funny how many of them I forgot about! Great group number to get the parrttty started. It was choreographed by Miss Lacey Schwimmer who’s in the ballroom! Come back Lacey! Next a montage of all dances and critiques from last night from the final four. The results are in from twitter for the freestyle encore and of course it went to Kellie & Derek! Beautiful!
There were voting issues last night on abc.com. So due to the snafu the online votes that made it through will not be counted to keep it fair. Now the first safe/not safe…the couple landing in fourth place is Alexandra & Mark (sorryNMD!). Aly receives a standing O and a montage to her favorite song, Titanium. Mark called her the best student he’s ever had. The remaining couples must now prepare for their final dance and final judges votes to add to their scores. We’re treated to a repeat all woman dance which includes the final 3 women, Zendaya, Aly and Kellie. Its a good thing this didn’t count towards anything but fun because it was really evident Zendaya was the only one with some musicality…LOL! Poor Kellie and Aly looked out of their element and it was only 5 seconds of dancing!
We get another montage of the early leavers from season 16. This segues to Wynonna doing what she does best…singing. She sings “I want to know what love is” and is accompanied by Tony and Peta. Really lovely rendition. Back from the break and the Queen V, Miss van der Pump herself dances a foxtrot with Len Goodman! andGleb! It’s such a treat to see Len dance! So cute! Dorothy is dancing next but unfortunately Tristan is injured and he cannot dance tonight. So Dorothy dances the Viennese waltz with Henry. Another beautiful performance and she’s joined by Kristi Yamaguchi!!!! Tonight is full of surprises! Andy is next and he does a funny skit making fun of his crying and Carrie Ann’s 5 🙂 He dances his jazz routine with the Alice in Wonderland theme set to Lady Gaga’sPoker Face. Good job from Andy!
Brookebot is conducting interviews of the finalist while they’re practicing for their instant dances. Jacoby & Karina are performing a salsa to Aguanile, one of my all time favorite salsa jams! But before we get to the dances we get more performances. Psy performs his new single, Gentleman, and gets the crowd jumping! I will admit it took me a few to realize he’s singing in Korean O_o. Sean, Andy and Victor join the Psy dancers and pros. Good hip action!
Back from commercial and Brookebot interviews Kellie & Derek as they are practicing. They are dancing the jive to Little Richard’s “Keep a-knockin'”. Can you guess what’s next? If you guessed montage then you get a cookie! Theme nights are recapped along with the scathing critiques from some of the worst offenders and their exits. Another dance performance from the dance troupe and pros. Brookebot now interviews the last couple in the finale, Zendaya & Val. They are dancing the jive to Rocking Robin. Val’s eye is doing ok with 14 stitches. I love this mutual admiration society going on with Zendaya & Val. This was a good partnership and you can hear the audience cheering for them in the background. Now we get a slamming performance by Pitbull! This dude is such a party starter! He’s needed to get the energy up because this show is running very long. There is a little old lady sitting in a wheelchair in the corner of the stage and even she’s on her feet rocking to Pitbull! Love it!
Now onto the homestretch. Hopefully last montage of the last three weeks of performances, critiques and eliminations. Now onto the final dances on this finale. First up…
Jacoby & Karina – Instant Salsa – Score 30 Total Score 86
- CAI – 10
- LG – 10
- BT – 10
Last rehearsal and Jacoby is showing wear and tear. The man is tired! Karina is relentless! Good effort from Jacobyexcept at the end he almost took Karina’s head off again! I swear that move makes me jump every time. Len calls him fun and full of vitality. He calls Jacoby a breath of fresh air. Bruno says he has the power and spice of life. Charisma and showmanship and he could watch him anytime. Carrie Ann says he’s a champion and that was a dance of a champion. I think the judges had some spiked Kool-Aid because Jacoby looked tired in his dance and while a good dance it wasn’t exactly lively on his part. Karina has energy for days but she’s not the one being judged.
Kellie & Derek – Instant Jive – Score 30 Total Score 94
- CAI – 10
- LG – 10
- BT – 10
Kellie & Derek get their picture up on the dance rehearsal hall wall. These two are well partnered and have a really good happy energy. Good jive from Kellie! It was energetic and upbeat but I saw a few missteps which I’m sure the judges will ignore. And Bruno is out of his chair! He said Kellie reminds him of Julieanne Hough and said it was wonderful. Carrie Ann called it a perfect ending to a wonderful journey and called them the wonder twins. Len says she the bee’s knees, my mama’s pajamas, my uncle’s called uncle you’re awesome I’m telling you!
Zendaya & Val – Instant Jive – Score 30 Total Score 95
- CAI – 10
- LG – 10
- BT – 10
During the last rehearsals Zendaya is wearing what looks like a Mickey Mouse sweatshirt but for some reason she has black tape over the image. Val and her are really cute and she calls him her big brother. She’s going to miss dancing with her grumpy big brother. I tell you these Chmerkovskiy brothers make grumpy so hawt! A most excellent age appropriate jive from Zendaya! I loved it! Carrie Ann is going to be so sad she’s not going to see them dance anymore. She says they have a special flava when they dance and it makes watching it a joy. Len says for a lady of 16 she dances with such maturity and has such character when she dances. He says she will spread her wings and fly away once the show is over. Bruno says she has pitch perfect performer instinct and it is something he has seen in very few people. He says she has unique and individual style. Twinkle twinkle little star you will go very far.
So all three couples are on stage but before we get to the results one more performance. This one by Jessica Sanchez singing the theme for this season’s DWTS, Feel this Moment, accompanied by another frickking montage! Good lord this show has filler for days!!! Finally onto the results! Third place goes to Jacoby & Karina. I feel this is the right order. While Jacoby has charisma for days he’s not a better dancer than Kellie or Zendaya. Now for the grand finale…second place goes to Zendaya & Val which makes KELLIE & DEREK the champions for season 16 of Dancing with the Stars!
So that’s a wrap! I hope you all have enjoyed these recaps as much as I have enjoyed doing them. Thank you NMDand the rest of the Lynn Fam community. You guys rock!
(Thank you Lisette for the recaps of this delightful show. NMD! I think the best couple won – and I’m glad Aly made it to the finals)