Real Housewives of Orange County and Newlyweds

Real Housewives of Orange County

by Stars99

Lydia on phone w HeatherThe episode opens with Lydia driving in her car and talking to Heather on the phone regarding the upcoming Salsa Party that Lydia is planning. Lydia is conflicted because she wants both Alexis and Heather to come to the party but Heather has bailed out because of Alexis’ attendance.  Heather explains that it’s not that she doesn’t want to be around Alexis but that it’s because she doesn’t want Lydia to have a problem at her party.  Lydia, the Peacemaker and the Friendship Whisperer, encouraged Heather to have a Friendship Summit with Alexis so they can talk things out.  Lydia tells Heather it wouldn’t be the same without Heather at the Salsa Party.  This is probably because Heather has proven herself to be oh, so much fun (not!) over and over again at these functions. (Hope you didn’t get too drenched in sarcasm.)  Heather tells us that Lydia just doesn’t understand the history and the dynamics of her relationship with Alexis.  Heather conceded to call Alexis for a Friendship Summit.  Lydia promises that if this doesn’t work that she will just move forward and not continue to press the issue.  She says, “I promise, I promise, I promise.”  Lydia, even if you click your heels 3 times, it still doesn’t mean we’re in Kansas anymore!  Lydia tells us in her talking head, “I feel like the friendship whisperer trying to get all these girls together… Genius!” Now to be fair, I listened to this portion a couple of times – and it seems to me like the “Genius” portion was spliced in to give us the idea she’s calling herself a “genius.”  I just don’t think that’s Lydia’s style, IPPHO.

Tamra is in the “Wines by Wives” offices (Gee, I wonder why she isn’t at the C.U.T. Studio – maybe because she’d actually hafta work or workout).  Vicki is bringing a “surprise” for Tamra which is a box of wine with their new labels on them.  The name on Vicki’s label says, “Work Hard, Play Harder” and Tamra’s label says, “Too Good to Throw.” This is the first time they’ve seen the actual labels affixed onto the bottles that they picked for their wine-of-the-month club.  They start talking about Lydia’s upcoming Salsa Party.  Vicki thinks Eddie must know how to salsa dance and Tamra confides that she doesn’t know how to dance at all.  They pour their wine into really gaudy wine glasses.  One says, “I heart wine” and the other has a huge silver cluster of grapes on the side of it. Gee, I wonder if you can purchase these from their website?  Let me go check…Why yes, yes you can… Color me so surprised!  Here’s the link for the “I Heart Wine”: but I don’t see the other one available for purchase.  See, now that’s just silly – to have one available and not the other? But perhaps I just missed it or something and I really don’t have time to look any… I thought they were more marketing savvy than that – Well, at least I thought Vicki was… Anyway… on with the show… Tamra is saying that she doesn’t dance but she loves a good theme party (Cue footage from last season’s 80s theme party wherein Tamra is full-on screaming at Vicki). Vicki tells Tamra that Gretchen is mere dirt under Vicki’s fingernails.  Vicki says that she Innocent Vickidoesn’t enjoy being around Gretchen and that she thinks she’s very self-centered.  Tamra agrees that Gretchen is very self-centered but that she accepts her for who she is.  Tamra says to her that they’re friends but that their friendship got a little strained from their trip to Mexico.  Tamra insinuates that it’s Vicki’s fault and Vicki does this angelic cutesy wootsie face and molds her hands into a V under her chin. If I look real hard I can almost see a halo. Tamra says that she doesn’t understand why Gretchen was so mad at them.  Vicki quickly reminds her that it was because they “Ding dong ditched her.”  They have a good laugh.  Vicki tells Tamra that she’s not bringing Brooks to the Salsa Party (We know better though, don’t we… We’ve seen the previews…lol).  Tamra asks Vicki that she tell Brooks not to get involved in their “bickerments” (I think she meant part argument/part bickering)… and that he shouldn’t say anything if Tamra rolls her eyes at Vicki. Ironically, Vicki then rolls her eyes at Tamra.  I’m rolling my eyes at both of them.  Vicki warns Tamra not to mess up their rekindled friendship.  Tamra tells Vicki she shouldn’t either – but Vicki says she’s perfect (Insert another gratuitous eye roll here…). I’m exhausted already.

Evidently, Laguna Coffee is “Friendship Summit Central” because that’s where Heather and Alexis Heather - the frienship summitare meeting.  Heather isn’t sure what she is going to gain from meeting with Alexis.  They begin with niceties and then Alexis asks, “What are we doing here?”  Heather tells her that she told Lydia that she was going to back away from going to the Salsa Party but that Lydia called again to try to convince her to reconsider her attendance.  Heather thinks it’s crazy that the two of them are having problems.  Alexis says that she isn’t the type to start something at a party – and Heather just doesn’t want anything bad to happen at Lydia’s party.  Alexis says she was trying to extend an olive branch to everyone at Tamra’s dinner party from H***.  Heather didn’t think that’s what Alexis was doing towards her.  Alexis tells Heather she felt attacked by her all season (Cue flashback to the Reunion wherein Heather tells Alexis, “See, if everyone says that you’re dead, then maybe you should lie down.”  Her Royal Heathership takes great offence in being lumped in with the rest of the group.  She asserts that while they were on their trip, she responded to Alexis’ question.  She did not yell at Alexis - 'friendship summitAlexis, she didn’t call her names, and she didn’t say anything derogatory to her. (Right that’s only true if you don’t count being called “pretentious” as being derogatory).  Heather tells Alexis that she just might not have liked what Heather had to say.  Alexis tells Heather that she doesn’t ever mind what Heather says – it’s more how she says it.  Alexis feels that Heather talks down to her.  Gasp! You mean to say, you think our Royal Heatherness talks down to people?  Say it isn’t so!  Alexis actually thought Heather was going to apologize but she was sadly mistaken.  Heather tells Alexis that all she hears from her is about who has wronged her, yadda, yadda, yadda.  While Heather is not likely to invite Alexis over for a sleep over to braid each other’s hair (or their hair extensions) they both agree to be civil.  Civil? I’m thinking it may probably end up more like the Civil War, IPPHO.

Since no one else is friends with Gretchen, she has her mother (Brenda) over so she can rehash her trip to Mexico.  Gretchen said there was just a lot of “craziness” that went on but it’s probably not the kind of thing her Mom really wants to have detailed to her.  No, I’m sure it’s much easier for your Mom and her friends to watch your exploits in HD over and over again.  That Gretchen Christine is such a lady, isn’t she?  At one point in last week’s episode, although I don’t think I blogged it because there was just too many gross things to capture, our very own Gretchen said as she was reaching in between one of the slimy guys’ legs, “I’m actually holding his hangie down thingie (paraphrased).”  Her Mom must be so danged proud of her – Yep.. yep… yep!  Gretchen asks her mom, “Do you remember Lauri who used to hang out with the group?”  Gretchen then proceeds to tell her Mom about how Lauri divulged some very interesting information about Vicki to her.  She said that Lauri told her some of Vicki’s “indiscrepancies” (Nope, that’s not a typo – that’s what Gretchen actually said) with a lot of men and her infidelity with Donn.  Gretchen said there were so many times in Mexico that she just wanted to lash out at Vicki – but she didn’t.  Gretchen tells us in her talking head, that she really thought she would be happy that she had some dirt on Vicki – but that she just really doesn’t feel that way.  Because of what she and Slade have gone through in the last couple of months with the ongoing hospitalization of Slade’s son, things like that seem so insignificant now.  The only things that matter to her are Slade, she and Slade together, and their family.  Gretchen told her mother about how she’s been struggling for the last couple of years about getting married again – and that she feels like she hurt Slade a lot when he wanted to ask her to marry him. Her Mom tells her she thinks she made the right decision back then.  Gretchen says that she is fortunate to have found a man who adores her.  She asks her Mom if she likes Slade, now? After a very awkward silence, her Mom says that she would be very happy for them to get married and have a baby.  I wonder if Mom knows that Gretchen is planning on having the baby first and THEN get she’ll get married?  Somehow I’m thinking not… Gretchen just doesn’t want to make any more mistakes. (You mean like actually planning to have a baby BEFORE you get married?)  Her Mom sagely tells her that it will all work out.  Or not.

Briana and TroyRyan is cooking dinner on his last night at home before he has to report for Combat Training at a base in 29 Palms which is about 2 ½  hours away from Coto de Caza.  Briana is so sad.  He will be at the base for 3-4 months before he gets deployed.  Vicki comes home dragging in a huge new rug behind her.  Baby Troy is wearing his fatigues onesie and Briana is wearing a USMC T-shirt symbolizing family military service solidarity.  Vicki wants to know if they can call someone to get him out of reporting for duty.  Vicki point blank asks Briana what she needs while he’s gone.  Briana just wants a happy home.  She wants Ryan to be safe… to do his job… and then get his butt back home.  This is his 5th tour.  In her talking head, Vicki tells us that she now understands why they eloped.  Ryan had just come back from his last tour of duty – he lived while others in his squad weren’t so lucky.  Briana had just come out of surgery – she lived. They both wanted to live in the moment and had a sense of , “What are we waiting for?” So they eloped! Vicki says that for them it worked.  Her hopes and prayers are that he stays safe.  Briana wants him to stay safe, come home and see his son grow up. They say a tearful goodbye… It just can’t be said enough, “Thank you for your service, Ryan!”  And thank you to all the other “Ryans” in our midst!

Woo hoo!  It’s Salsa Party night… Lydia is wearing a sparkly silver black dress and husband Doug is wearing red pants. It takes a very secure man to wear bright red pants.  Lydia says that her secret to hosting a great party is hiring a great party planner.  Gretchen and Slade pick up Terry and Heather in a limo while Alexis picks up Vicki in another one.  Ugh… Vicki is wearing her mink again.  I cannot emphasize this enough… it does NOT get cold enough to wear a mink here in Orange County. It just really doesn’t – especially on that night.  You can tell because the others are wearing much less and don’t seem to be shivering or anything.  Talk about being pretentious!  While on their way to the venue in the limo, Terry is goaded into calling Brooks to see if he’s coming to the party. 

Meanwhile, in the other limo, Alexis and Vicki seem to be each other’s dates for the evening.  Alexis says that Jim is stuck in San Diego right now and can’t come to the party.  Alexis asks Vicki about Brooks and their relationship.  Vicki says he was just in Mississippi but that they’re supposed to have dinner tomorrow night so they’ll see where they’re at when they see each other. It’s been longer than a couple of weeks since she’s seen Brooks. 

Terry gets through to Brooks and tells him to put on his salsa clothes because he knows he has some and come to this party.  Creepy Brooks explains that he just got off at work… I mean, he just got off from work… I mean, he just came home from work… Whew… that was close…

Lydia and Doug are awaiting everyone’s arrival.  Doug puts on a moustache (Crooked as it is… but still a good sport).  Lydia is handing out flowers for the ladies (and I do use this term lightly) to wear in their hair over their ear. (And no, I still don’t see the issue with Lydia’s ears, tyvm.)  Everyone is gushing about how great they all look… blah, blah, blah… Lydia tells us that she is still trying to figure Gretchen out – She’s seen glimmers of a person that she really likes but she’s also seen huge moments of somebody that she doesn’t want to know at all.  Lydia seems to be on the fence about her at this point.  Come join us on the dark side, Lydia!  Wow, I can’t really tell for sure, but it sure appears that Alexis also wore a fur coat of some kind.  Oh wait… I get it… maybe these coats are the “wrath of furry” that Gretchen was talking about a couple of episodes ago! 

Alexis tells us that it’s great to walk into the party without having a weird animosity between her and Heather.  While standing in a group with the others, Alexis says she heard they had a lot of fun in Mexico and Heather said she used a lot of Febreze and hand sanitizer.  They confirmed that there were penises everywhere. Lauri shows up with her husband, George.  Vicki says she hasn’t seen Lauri in years.  Vicki still doesn’t know anything about Lauri’s tell-all gossip fest with Gretchen at Vicki’s expense. 

Crass AssesSlade and Terry are standing off to the side talking.  Slade clues in Terry about Lauri and her husband and then tells him that he also dated Lauri for a minute prior to her getting married to George.  Slade clarifies that he and Lauri never actually went on an official “date” but that they “hung out” together… Terry immediately gets his meaning.  Evidently, Tamra called Lydia and asked her if she could bring a guest – and that’s why Lauri is there. Lydia thought the more the merrier!  In tonight’s installment of, “I kid you not”, Terry, being the complete pig that he is at least at this moment, actually asks Slade, “So on a scale of 1-10 how was it?”  Slade says without a second of hesitation, “Oh, a 10”… Then Terry’s follow-up question is, “And how is Gretchen?”  Slade responds, “Oh, beyond…”  I feel like I have been teleported back to a frat house or something… I cannot believe the question was asked… Or that it was answered…And not once, but twice! Her Royal Heathership certainly is not going to be amused at all by this.  Gretchen probably won’t be either if indeed she’s smart enough to understand how smarmy Slade really is by talking like this… And isn’t it just so great that now they have the entire conversation recorded for posterity so that their kids and future grandkids can learn some valuable lessons of crassness from their grandfathers, no?  Dagnabit, where are the face eating zombies when you need them?

Lydia Teaches G and Slade on adulthoodLydia encourages everyone to get something to eat.  Lydia is chomping down on chips and salsa, probably because she couldn’t get any from that hifalutin restaurant they went to that first night in Mexico and she’s been craving them ever since!  Talk ensues about how skinny Lydia is and that where on earth is she going to put all that food?  Lauri (who has just met her) says that she thinks she must have an empty leg.  Slade whispers to Gretchen that they should call her “Cheeseburger.”  Lydia prompts Slade to share with the class what he just said and he comes clean and says that they should start calling her “Cheeseburger” because he wants to buy her a cheeseburger. Hardee har har.  Okay, Tubba Wubba we’ll be sure to do that… (Sorry, but I hate when adults do this kind of stuff – thinner people have body image issues just like other-girthed people).  Lydia calls him out because he didn’t make the original comment directly to her even though she’s standing right there.  Slade corrects her and says that he said it loud enough for her to hear it on purpose.  Lydia says that no, he actually whispered it to Gretchen. Slade says that he only did that because he was playing with Lydia – Okay, whoa boy! You’d better stop right now, Slade… You may not be used to it because you live with the likes of Gretchen, but you are now talking to someone outside your “ken”… and her Ken will kick your Barbie every single time (Sorry, obscure BBT reference).  Slade then continues to dig himself into a hole and says that if he didn’t want Lydia to hear it then he wouldn’t have said it.  Lydia says, “Oh, then you would have said it afterwards – later?”  Slade says that yes, if that was the kind of person he was…but that he had no problem saying it to her face.  Lydia astutely points out that actually, he did have a problem telling her – because he originally made his comments only to Gretchen. Slade lamely rationalizes that was only because everyone was engaged in a conversation.  Then when Lydia asked him about it – he told her what he had said.  Slade, you really are acting like a dumbass… You just confirmed exactly what Lydia has been saying all along.  In her talking head, Lydia tells us she likes to be direct – especially if it’s about her – So if someone starts whispering then she will ask them what they’re whispering about… Enrique Suave Slade is desperately trying to convince Lydia that he meant it as a compliment because the rest of them shouldn’t be eating cheeseburgers but that Lydia could get away with it.  Really? So you’re calling everyone else in the group hefty?  Well, arguably, most of them ARE trash bags, no doubt. In her talking head and as the supreme “snap” of the night, Lydia says, “Slade, here’s $5.00 for the douche jar.”  Whoa… there’s a douche jar?  I only knew about the cussin’ jar?  Boy, if there’s really a douche jar – we’ll all be rich from watching this crap!

Then Gretchen tries to mock Lydia in her talking head because she doesn’t understand why Lydia’s making such a big deal about all of this. Gretchen says that she wonders if Lydia maybe didn’t get enough attention when she was a kid. Evidently, Gretchen doesn’t have the good sense to realize that in essence, her boyfriend just called her fat.  Lydia tries to point out that Slade wouldn’t have handled it the same way if she was overweight.  But because Tubba Wubba is indeed a big, fat pig (and this is no reference to his weight whatsoever – just his general piggishness) he implies that he would have said something anyway.  [Note:  I didn’t even know that piggishness was even a real word, but it doesn’t have a red line underneath it so I think I’m good to go, no?]  Lydia tells us that she’s always been thin but she’s never been teased about it and this is the first time that she’s been scrutinized for it.  Slade continues to say it’s a compliment. Gretchen is laughing along not really getting it that Slade in essence called Gretchen a heifer.  Tamra and Eddie walk into the party – and Tamra is almost wearing her dress.  It has huge cutouts that you would probably wear during a “Dancing with the Stars” routine.  Hmmm… perhaps this episode is her incognito audition… After all, they ARE going to do some salsa dancing…hmmm…. Lydia toasts to salsa and some dirty dancing!  Vicki cocks her head to the side as if she’s not so sure about that…

SalsaIn walks Brooks with a huge bouquet of flowers.  Terry is dying laughing and seems overly pleased with himself.  Tamra’s like, “Why the H*** is Brooks here?”  Vicki seems genuinely shocked to see him. (Although she was wearing the mink he gave her… so it may not have been such a big surprise? I dunno… These franchises have brought out the conspiracy theorist in me).  Brooks says, “It’s been a while.” Vicki corroborates that it’s been a long time.  She looks at the flowers and asks if she’s getting married because there’s a lot of diamonds in the flowers.  Brooks laughs it off.  Gretchen thinks that Vicki has been lying this whole time about the whole Brooks relationship thing and that she just wants everyone’s sympathy that she can’t be with the man she loves.  Brooks gives Tamra a hug “hello” and tells her that she looks nice… Tamra tells us that that she has already said what she wanted to about Brooks.  While he’s not her favorite guy, she is going to try to be a bigger person and will try to bite her tongue regarding her opinions about him.  Brooks tells people that he missed them. (Gag!)  Tamra tells him upfront that she’s still a little mad at him but that she and Vicki are getting things back on track.  Brooks tells Tamra, “That’s understandable.”  Brooks tells Tamra that he thinks her intentions were spot on and pure but that he had issues with the way she went about it. Tamra cops to the fact that her delivery always sucks.  Brooks says that he’s learning that.  Tamra says she’s willing to move on with Brooks if that’s what Vicki wants.  Tamra knows she doesn’t have to love him – Vicki does. (Now before your heads start to explode, don’t you worry boys and girls… it won’t take long for Tamra to talk badly about Brooks once again… let’s watch and see…).

Vicki and Brooks talk together and Vicki is confused about where they are at in their relationship.  Brooks assures her that they are, “finding their way.”  Vicki says that Troy is currently at 29 Palms and will come home on the weekends until he gets deployed. Wait… I thought we just had a huge tearful goodbye… But he’s just going to be gone for 5 days at a time for 3-4 months? (Deep sigh…) Vicki feels nervous about Brooks being there… She’s not sure why he’s even there – they’re at such an icky point in their relationship (Yes, Vicki does indeed use the word “icky” to describe their relationship…lololol…little does she know how many people call her “Icky”) Vicki wonders… Does he love her… Does he not love her… Are they dating… Are they not dating?  Brooks thinks she’s nervous because she feels out of control. Heather comes up and tells them that it’s really nice to see them together.  I suspect she also wants to smooth out any ripples her husband’s invitation to Brooks to attend the night’s festivities might have caused…

Tamra goes over and starts to talk to Lauri about Brooks and how she’s shocked that he’s even there.  See, I told you not to worry, boys and girls!  Tamra hasn’t really turned over a new leaf.  She’s just learning to be nicer to your face while stabbing you in the back! Lauri says she didn’t know Vicki and Brooks were still dating. Tamra says that Vicki said they weren’t still together.  Tamra says, “He’s out on the town. Big time…”  Lauri asks how she knows…  Tamra tells her that whatever Lauri’s heard – that she’s also heard.  Lauri says, “Seriously?  Oh, you mean with the stripper – slash – porn star?”  Tamra says she didn’t know about that.  In her talking head, Lauri tells us that one of their “daughters” came to her and told her that Brooks is dating one of her friends.  Tamra clarifies, “So he is having sex with “bleep.”  Lauri said that Brooks told the girl that he was still seeing Vicki.  Lauri tells us that her daughter’s friend gets paid to do some very questionable activities.  Lauri, in talking about Vicki, says, “Honey, if only you knew who you were with.”  Tamra says that’s why she doesn’t trust him at all. 

Girls learning salsaLydia starts the salsa dancing portion of the evening.  Girls on one side and guys are on the other.  Heather says that Terry doesn’t have just two left feet – he has 12 so she kicks him to the curb and wants to dance with Eddie instead.  Tamra says that, “Eddie definitely has the skills to pay the bills – he’s Latin – he can shake his ‘bleep.’”  They all keep changing partners.  So inevitably, Vicki and Slade dance together; then Brooks and Tamra dance together.  And because, she just can’t resist a dig on Alexis, Tamra says, “Who is next – Jim Bellino?”  And Jim’s not even there! 

Dessert is served… Gretchen and Slade are talking to Doug (Lydia’s husband) yet again about Lydia’s weight.  Gretchen tells Doug that she’s jealous of Lydia and Doug says that Lydia eats a lot.  Slade tells him that he told Lydia that she was genetically gifted.  Yeah, that’s exactly the first thing that popped into my mind when you nicknamed her “Cheeseburger.” Gretchen tells Slade that he obviously offended Lydia and that it was not cool.  Then inexplicably, Doug tells them that Lydia had to stop nursing Maverick because… then Slade fills in the blank with, “because he was taking a lot out of her.” Slade thinks maybe Lydia is just being sensitive because she got so thin while nursing the babies.  Doug is continuing to talk while Lydia and Alexis pop into the conversation.  Because Slade obviously has a full view of Lydia when she joins the conversation, says, “She’s a very tough girl, she can take a joke.”  Lydia says, “I can take a joke but I felt like it wasn’t a joke and it wasn’t like you were making it directly at me like a funny thing – You were whispering it to her so that made me feel bad…. So next time, just make the joke to me, I can take it.” 

Gretchen turns to Slade and asks him if he’s listening to her and Slade says that Lydia is a much better person than they are.  Lydia then continues on with, “From what I hear, you’ve made jokes about people and they’ve had to get surgeries and all sorts of things.”  Slade says completely sarcastically, “Exactly, Yes, I’m so influential.”  Gretchen asks her what she’s talking about – Is she talking about someone wanting to have surgery just because of something Slade said?  Lydia said, “He called Vicki, “Miss Piggy” and she had a nose job… (In her talking head, Lydia wonders what man criticizes a woman’s appearance? She’s not used to being around or hanging around people like that…) Gretchen wants to know if Vicki told her that – and no, she didn’t… but Lydia is putting two and two together.  She asks them if they think Slade’s words had an influence on that decision.  Gretchen flat out says, “No.”  Slade smugly said that part of the problem was that he never actually called her that.  He says that he just said, “This is what is on the internet… this is what people have said.”  Right, because saying that and showing people a picture of Miss Piggy alongside a picture of Vicki during your stupid, highly unfunny, little pretend comedy routine wasn’t at all implying that you think that Vicki looks like Miss Piggy?  Actually, you and Terry are the swine in the room at the moment… but I digress…  Lydia says slyly, “Okay, I’ve seen who you are.”  You immediately get the point that Lydia has sized up the situation and has Slade’s number already.  Gretchen wants to know what that’s supposed to mean. I’m surprised that Gretchen didn’t understand it – “Okay, I’ve seen who you are” are all monosyllabic words except for the “okay” part… You don’t think that the word “okay” actually tripped her up, do you?  Lydia explains her intent was to say that Slade is never going to take any ownership of it.  Slade says that to think Vicki’s surgery had anything to do with him is just Lydia stirring up something that she doesn’t know anything about since Vicki has had surgeries for years.  (You see Vicki standing like 3 feet away from them, straining to hear every word they’re saying…) Again, Lydia clarifies that Vicki never said that to her but that she made an assumption.  Gretchen is not sure she can be cool with Lydia if she continues to offend Slade. (I think I may have just gotten whiplash from Gretchen’s last statement… Poor, poor, offended lil Slade…).  In her talking head, Lydia says she thinks that Slade should hang out with Doug to get some lessons on how to be a gentleman and have proper etiquette because he obviously just doesn’t know… it’s just weird.  Like he should check me out less and maybe pay more attention to “Malibu Beach Barbie.”  At this point, I completely fall on the floor, roaring with laughter… I think there’s just something about Lydia calling Gretchen “Malibu Beach Barbie” – because it really doesn’t feel like it’s a part of her normal nature to do it – Unfortunately, it looks like Lydia’s already spent too much time with this group and has moved to the dark side… lol.  That’s okay, I didn’t used to be snarky, either… (That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!) Come over here, Lydia… Join the snarkfest!

CheersAlexis decides to go hang out with Tamra and Lauri and they start talking about wedding planning.  Tamra has evidently already asked the girls to go wedding dress shopping with her – including Alexis.  It’s Gretchen’s turn to be listening in on a conversation and honestly, you actually see Gretchen get physically ill… It’s quite hysterical!  Tamra says she’s trying to bring Alexis back into the mix and that she doesn’t want her to feel like an outsider again. Gretchen looks like she just chomped down on one of Yolanda’s lemons and is pouting about how she just doesn’t understand why Alexis is invited.  Alexis hasn’t been involved in anything up to this point of time… Meanwhile, Vicki, Lydia and Heather are putting on silly fake moustaches… and they look like they’re having way too much fun for words!

Alexis makes her exit from the party and marvels at how she’s left relatively unscathed.  She’s surprised that she doesn’t even have any scratches and bruises.  Little did she know that the minute she left, that Gretchen started talking smack about her to Tamra.  Gretchen is really cranky that Alexis was invited to such a personal event as shopping for a wedding dress when she had been talking so much s*** about Tamra for the last 9 months and threatening to sue her.  Gretchen says that it’s just really weird to her.  She wonders if it’s not going to be awkward for Tamra?  Right Gretchen, cuz you’re concerned… about Tamra.  Holy Delusional, Batman! Tamra tells Gretchen that she’s made peace with Alexis. Gretchen asks Tamra that wouldn’t she want her closest friends to be there?  Is Alexis considered to be one of them?  Tamra says that Alexis is not one of her closest friends.  Then Tamra takes off her big girl panties and hands them to Gretchen by offering to disinvite Alexis if Gretchen doesn’t want her there. Oholynightthestarsarebrightlyshining, are you kidding me? Saint Gretchen says it’s not about her – it’s about Tamra.  Tamra says, “Well, it’s not entirely about me because you’re saying you don’t want her to be there.”  Gretchen says, “No,” but that she was just surprised that Tamra wanted Alexis to be there.  Gretchen is “concerned” that Alexis is going to say things like, “Oh, I’m so happy for you” and “I’m so excited for you” when for the last 9 months she hasn’t been excited for Tamra about anything.  Gosh, what a complete b*** that Alexis is… I mean how dare she say she’s happy for someone who is getting married?  Gretchen says, “I just don’t want to put myself in that situation… If I feel like I’m going to get angry about the fact that I don’t think she is being sincere then I feel like maybe I should remove myself if she’s going to be part of it.”  Tamra is surprised that Gretchen now doesn’t want to go wedding dress shopping with her just because Alexis is going to be there. And yes folks, we end up back in kindergarten where you can’t have any more than just one friend at a time and where you demand that your friend chooses who gets to play with her on the teeter totter of life.  Whee… Up we go… down we go… Up we go… down we go… Whoops, I think I lost my friendship bracelet again… Oh, there it is over by the monkey bars… I’ve got to go get it before anyone steals it!  THUD!  Watch out Gretchen!  I have a feeling you’re about to be dropped like a hot potato!


Newlyweds First Year

by BB

Tarz and Tina:  Tina was pregnant but had a miscarriage.  She is devastated and afraid she may not be able to carry a child.  Tarz’ mom calms her down and tells her she’ll be there to help and support her along the way.  Tarz and Tina are in the car and Tina thinks Tarz is not being sensitive enough about the miscarriage.  She calls him emotionally monotone.  She’s upset that he’s not upset.  He tells her he’s upset but she doesn’t believe it.  Tarz is not “out there” with his emotions.  Tina tells him she’s irritated with him but he says it’s not really him she’s irritated with, it’s the situation.  Tina and Tarz are meeting Tina’s dad, Kan, and his new girlfriend for dinner.  Tina will be meeting her for the first time.  He’s been dating her for a while but hasn’t said much about her except her name is Heather.  Tina pictures her as a motherly-type looking person.  She doesn’t want to see her dad with
another woman again.  But is has been over three years since her mom died.  They show up and Heather is young with a nice rack.  Tina thinks she looks about 20.  Heather is a nurse who has four daughters (so I would guess she’s probably over 20).  She met Tina’s dad at the gym.  They are sitting at the table kissing.  They can’t keep their hands off each other.  Heather says they’ve been talking about getting married and having a child.  Tina is about to have a cow and I can’t say that I blame her.  I mean, if her dad wants to date and get married again, that’s his business.  But the way they went about telling Tina about their relationship was not good at all.  On WWHL, Andy calls it one of the most awkward things he’s ever seen.  I wouldn’t go so far as to say that, Dandy Andy.  Andy has personally said and done some pretty awkward things himself.  Anyway, Tina and Heather leave the table.  Tarz tells Tan he’s acting  like he’s 14 years old by flaunting his new girlfriend in front of them and talking like he’s in a locker room.  Heather returns to the table, followed by Tina, who tells them to stop with the PDA.  Heather tells them they are acting immature but Tarz says they are not the ones making out at the table like teenagers.  Later, Tina and Tarz are talking about how inappropriate her dad and his girlfriend acted at dinner.  Tarz tells Tina they need to prepare themselves for whatever her dad decides to do and that he’ll always be there for her no matter what happens.

John and Kathryn:  At 36 weeks pregnant, Kathryn and John go to Lamaze class for the first time.  The wives tell Kathryn what their husbands do for them and Kathryn realizes John could have been doing so much more for her during her pregnancy.  During the class they discuss “ripping” and certain exercises they can do to prevent it.  It’s kind of too much information, even for me.  John is trying to get everyone’s attention by being gross.  John doesn’t find having sex with Kathryn very sexy at all.  They do a role reversal exercise so Kathryn can show him how he should be treating her.  At 38 weeks, Kathryn feels really fatigued and has lots of indigestion.  Kathryn’s sister shows up to see her and John’s sister shows up to see him.  Kathryn and her sister are up in her room.  John and his sister are downstairs putting baby things together.  John is not into it and is really not used to doing things he doesn’t want to do. They struggle trying install the baby seat in the car.  He’s complaining the whole time.  He can’t do it and gives up and calls it good enough.  He’s a big old spoilt rotten baby brat.  At four days past her due date, John makes the ultimate sacrifice by having sex with his wife, but he didn’t like it.  Then they try going out for spicy food.  By the end of the episode she’s at least 12 days over her due date and looks miserable.

Jeff and Blair:  Blair has been away for two days visiting his family.  Jeff loves how quiet it has been and has enjoyed those two days.  Blair returns from New York horny and Jeff is not in the mood because he’s exhausted from working 50 hours that week.  Blair tells Jeff he’s been very patient lately.  Jeff is OK with once a week.  Blair says Jeff is getting old, but Jeff says it’s not an age thing because he’s pleasuring himself two or three times a day.  Jeff thinks they need to get away for a change of scenery and they should go camping.  Jeff works from the house and constantly cleans the house and thinks they need to get away from the house.  Blair is not going for it and says getting away once a month is not a solution for their problem.  He needs it more often than that.  Blair is in the kitchen making a mess.  He cleans up after himself because he knows Jeff expects him to be more responsible.  He surprises Jeff with hot chocolate and a snack.  Jeff is looking at pictures from when they were in Savannah and Blair tells him he is so stressed out about them not having sex when he returned from 7 days in New York.  Blair has problems with their sex life and Jeff feels stressed about them not having their finances straightened out.  Blair disagrees that Jeff sacrifices more on the financial front.  Blair says he is trying to do everything Jeff wants him to do.  I tend to side with Blair on this.  Jeff always seems to be making problems and excuses and it seems Blair is trying to make more changes than Jeff is willing to.  Blair wants to go to the attorney and get the wills drawn up.  Jeff seems to be putting it off.  Blair offers to pay for it and Jeff agrees to set it up.  They keep fighting about sex and money and Blair says they need to resolve it.  Jeff tells him there is nothing they can’t resolve and he’s in it for the long haul.

Alaska and Kim:  In New York, Alaska notices Kim took $700 out of their account.  Alaska needed to buy his airline ticket with it and he’s upset about Kim spending HIS money.  Kim reminds him it’s “their” money, it’s “their” account.  Kim has a business account of her own. She say she spends her money and “their” money.  Alaska visits his “militant” father.  He was not close to his father and used to get beatings from him for not going to church.  Now his father is a totally different man.  He is no longer a “prick” and Alaska needs to figure out how to be more like his father is now, not like he was before.  Kim wants Alaska and his dad to have a breakthrough and become closer because it will help with their future dynamic when they have kids.  Alaska’s relatives show up to share a Haitian meal prepared by Kim.  Kim is nervous cooking the kind of food Alaska’s mom used to cook.  The family tries the food and they love it (it does look delicious).  Alaska can feel his mom in the room and he has Kim to thank for making that happen.  Alaska is packing for LA and Kim asks him when he’s coming back.  She always gets sad when he leaves.  He tells her that’s what they have to do for now.  He knows she’s sad, so he surprises her with a planned honeymoon trip to Mexico.  She is stoked about it and didn’t think the day would come when he would make time for their honeymoon.

On WWHL, Andy announced the entire cast of Newlyweds would be on the show next week.


Happy Birthday DJPrincessc



About MelTheHound

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324 Responses to Real Housewives of Orange County and Newlyweds

  1. TexasTart says:

    Good Morning! 😀 Thank you for the blog, MTH, Stars & BB!

    • LaineyLainey says:

      You’re fiiiiiiiiiirst, Texas Tart!!! How are you liking this rain? I opened my eyes and had to rub them…”I’m not dreaming, it IS raining!!” Such a small amount but it’s nice.

      • TexasTart says:

        Hello blog neighbor! I know we need rain, but I can not deal with the afternoon when it’s 94 degrees and 90% humidity…ugh this weather makes me miserable.

        • LaineyLainey says:

          I know what you mean…my hair!!!…my makeup!!!! Thankful for the a.c. Especially during the high humidity.

    • Stars99 says:

      You’re welcome, the Tart One! Hey wait… you’re first… doesn’t that mean you get a prize? Since I’m not sure where George is these days… I think we should send you someone just as smarmy… hmmm… there are just so many possibilities, aren’t there? I’m thinking Slade… cuz he made my skin crawl… Enjoy!

  2. Apologies everyone – my computer had died. MelTheHound is holding down the fort.

  3. Cathy Connor says:

    Happy Birthday djprincess

  4. Cathy Connor says:

    No worries am sure you need a bit of a break . Thanks Mel for holdin it down !! Great job to all bloggers hats off to you all !! Sincerly ….

  5. Powell says:

    Good morning everyone. I hope the weather is nice where you are today. Have a great day.

    • LaineyLainey says:

      Good Morning, Powelly pooh!! It’s raining here in Central TX…a light rain,…but we’ll take it!!!

  6. BB says:

    Great OC recap Stars. OC’s really not upsetting me much this season. It doesn’t bother me watching it, it’s kinda fun seeing each one of them getting their comeuppance. NJ, on the other hand, ugh. I can’t watch that train wreck. I wonder why that is? Maybe because innocent kids are being used as pawns and props in all the drama?

  7. Cathy Connor says:

    Stars…Best line speaking of Slade “his general piggishness” omg love it !!!!

    • Stars99 says:

      lol Cathy… I just couldn’t come up with a better word than “piggishness” and I was truly surprised it was an actual word… but if it wasn’t… it would have become one out of necessity last night… lol

  8. Sus says:

    I had to drive the little darling to school this morning at O dark hundred. Bravo is running Season 3 of RHOOC. I got to relive cat crap condo daughter going to Miami and getting a tattoo on her foot. CCCD is 27 now!

    I forgot about the other Tammy and her girls and Lou! Remember the OC Angel photo shoot where those girls got into a fist fight. It was so awkward because it was obvious it was over Lou. Lindsey in her TH said she wasn’t sure but it was probably over a “guy”. It wasn’t clear if Lindsey knew Lou was doing girls her age! It was never clear whether he was with the Thai woman at the same time. Ick, I need another shower now.

    Where are they now: Lindsey got back recently from 2 years in Dubai working as a bartender at a club. Her sister Megan is in nursing school.

    Season 3 was the beginning of the end of Tamara and Simon.

    • Catseye says:

      I read a few months ago that Lindsey was arrested for a DUI and assaulting a cop. But, she’s a very pretty girl, so I think she got off with probation, as far as I remember. Good for Megan going to nursing school.

      • rabblerouser2010R says:

        If I remember correctly, wasn’t Megan suppose to the the one they were all worried about. I am glad she is doing well.

    • princesspindy says:

      Didn’t he die…or maybe I have my shows confused…

      • designernailsdiana says:

        Lou died without life insurance. GO see Vicki!

        • princesspindy says:

          wow, why do I know all this useless information….imagine if I put my mind to good use, LOL!!

        • Catseye says:

          His ex-wife should’ve really insisted on him buying a life insurance policy and naming her girls at least as beneficiaries, when they divorced. I think he had some older kids, as I recall. from the obituary.

  9. missusmc says:

    I agree with BB; after a night of New Jersey, the OC is a breath of fresh air! I’m really liking Lydia (although I usually do like the newbies better than the veterans, so give it a few seasons and I might not like her that much), and I know it’s really, really unpopular here, but I love Heather. Terry? Not so much. But I think having Heather and her schoolmarm-ish ways with this group of ladies is entertaining. I still think she would be better on New York, not because she proclaims herself to be “so New York,” but because I’m 100% certain Ramona and she would get into a huge argument, and I would love to see how big all their eyes get as they get offended by each other.

    • Sus says:

      I think Heather is snooty but you are right, she is entertaining with this group. I thought she was hysterical during the penis party. I wouldn’t have gone near those guys and if something did touch me, I’d be breaking out the Did I touch genitals sanitize lotion too.

    • BB says:

      I would looooooove to see Ramona and Heather get into it. Ramona wouldn’t take any of Heather’s crapola. For some reason, I think maybe Heather and Aviva might get along.

      • missusmc says:

        I think either Heather and Aviva would become super close friends, or complete enemies, and probably not much in between. They’re so similar, it could go either way. I could see Heather butting heads with Carole as well. Probably the only person she would get along with would be Sonja, but that’s just because she is used to being around drunk blondes with her OC experience.

    • chismosa says:

      Team Ramona always …..💚💙💚💙💚👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

    • TexasTart says:

      ROTFL at the visual missusmc provided with OC Heather and Ramona at it ” I would love to see how big all their eyes get as they get offended by each other.” 😆

  10. chismosa says:

    Morning all—

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY DJ!!!!! You’re a Gemini, cool. Hope you have a wonderful day!
    🎉🎉🎋🎁🎁🎁. Lots of hugs sent your way !

    BB- could you believe Newlyweds last night? I cannot get OVER Tina’s father. Oh my god! I think the issue is that in a traditional Indian household PDA is not to be found. Tarz has been with Tina for years and so knew that and it must have been appalling to see his father in law act this way and upset the already emotional Tina. I was happy with how Tarz acted. I think he and Tina are more solid than they appear.
    I hope to hear next week that Tina is pregnant

    That horrible John I want to kick his A$$!!! What a horrible horrible man. I just cannot believe him. Nor the fact that his family or sister are not taking any part in the wife’s pregnancy. This strikes me as quite quite odd for a typical Greek family. Maybe there is some estrangement there that is not spoken of. I’m finding it fishy.

    What a JERK! Next week I’m sure they’ll say it’s all good and their baby must be almost 1 year old now. (I also hate that they gave the baby the very Americanized version of a beautiful greek name, my brother has that name – my grandfather’s name as per tradition, and I can’t stand when it loses it’s ethnicity but that’s just my own personal issue with that)
    I can’t believe how much I enjoyed this show

    But did you all see the BIG news (giggle)—-
    Satchel-holder of jelly beans will be on WWH tonight!!!! No doubt flirting up a storm with that guy. Hahaha!!! She has no house in the hamptons and her apartment of her husband’s is on the market, so I can’t wait to hear where she’ll wind up.

    • ItzAngieDuh says:

      Satchel holder of jelly beans? Do you mean KKB? Say it ain’t so!! I’m definitely watching that so I can see her face split in half when she smiles!! Gretchen better do some lunges because Trampea is about to drop her on her butt!! Heatherstickupherbutt gets on my nerve with her pencil thin hair! She’s a bitch & her husband is a pig!! We all knew Slade is gross-so now he has found his compadre. Someone to bounce his disgustingness off of. Yuck!! Gretched & Heatherstickupherbutt should be besties cuz they both gave questionable taste in men. Icky & Trampra are made for each other. When will Lori reveal her reasoning for exposing Icky? These are questions I need answers to! Great job holding down the fort MTH!! We all appreciate it! Happy birthday djprincess!! Missing my girl Detox!! Any sightings?

      • chismosa says:

        Yes the ONE AND ONLY!
        KKB tonight! I’m sure Dandy is going to ask her about Ryan from Million Dollar Listing

        • not THAT Jill says:

          Hey chimosa-what name did John and Kathryn pick for the baby??? How annoying is he??? I want to smack him!!!

          • BB says:

            Dean James I think

          • chismosa says:

            He said it’s “Dean” and then another for the middle, probably her father’s name. If he’s the only son he HAS to name the son after his father – no choice in a greek family.

            Dean comes from >>> Constantine. In greek we call Constantine’s >>>>> “costa”
            IMHO it’s a very noble sounding name like Alexander. Comes from the emperor and saint Constantine.

            At like age 30 my brother decided it was “too hard” for his American friends to pronounce “costa” so he became Dean, which I refuse to call him. Lol

            I mean I guess I should be happy my father kept our 12-letter last name and didn’t reduce it like his brother and cousins did. I just hate the ethnicity being bred out in each generation. Shrug

            Hate that JOHN!!!!
            I think there’s more to the story there. The sister could give two scratches about her sil!!!????
            It’s verrrrrrrry odd

            • not THAT Jill says:

              I love Constantine and had no idea that the nickname was Dean!!!! Kevin’s cousin is married a Greek girl and she named all 4 of their kids very traditional Greek names-which I love but Kevin’s very Irish family has a hard time with saying the names correctly-which the cousins wife bitches about constantly!! Whatever-at least they try!!!

              • chismosa says:

                Jill- it’s so funny because I know like 3 Kevins. Lol

                Dean in and of itself may very well be, i’m sure— its own name I should say. I’m talking in terms of the ‘nickname’ of the longer name. If you meet someone who happens to be greek and their name is Dean, then ==constantine.
                Dean is a nice name– I just don’t associate it with my brother and refuse to refer to him as such. Haha! 🙉🙊

            • princesspindy says:

              When I think of Constantine, I think of the guy from American Idol with his stupid smoldering looks while singing….also I think of Michael Constantine from Room 222…

              • Buttercream says:

                Room 222! Loved that show with teacher and Karen what’s her (last name escapes me) name!

                • melthehound says:

                  I use to watch that show all the time. I can see their faces but don’t remember any of the character’s names. Like that guy with the ginger afro..

                • Stars99 says:

                  Was it Karen Valentine… I suppose I could look it up… but I love to remember the names from those old shows because they really emphasized the names in the opening credits… last week I scrunched my face to try to remember the names from the Mod Squad… I only got 2 out of 3 right… I’m slipping… dagnabit! lol

                • princesspindy says:


            • princesspindy says:

              What I also meant to say is/was, that my Dad’s name was Petros but when he came over on the boat they changed it to Peter at Ellis Island… 😦

              • chismosa says:

                Princess– yeah I know most think of the guy from Idol. Lol
                He’s talented but I think quite the ladies’ man- he hit on a friend of mine at some recent big greek function- and kind of in a creepy/ generic/ hits on a lot of girls- way? You know?

                Also —- Petros>>Peter is not as big a jump as Constantine >>Dean. So that’s ok, no? 🙂

                • princesspindy says:

                  I don’t get the Dean from Constantine…but I guess it’s better than Connie, lol!!!

                  I can just see him hitting on your friend, he is so swarmy, too funny!!

                • Powell says:

                  I like Petros & Constantine. Neither are at all hard to pronounce.

      • TexasTart says:

        Funny post, ItzAngieDuh….I miss Detox too, she hasn’t posted in a coon’s age – whatever that means – many months. JNNTJ tried to reach her by email and no reply, no one else on the board that day had heard from her. We hope she is well and will come and grace us with her presence someday.

      • chismosa says:

        Any sightings! You are so funny

        I miss Detox too

  11. Lulu says:

    Good morning everyone. Can’t say today is a good day 😦 My DH was unofficially informed that the company he is contracting for is laying off people. But he was told unofficially that “he” is fine and that they may relocate us?!?!?! But his company said they will provide relocation expenses to those layed off??? Who to believe? Lay off round 2! This time with a newborn and a mom that can’t go back to work for a couple of months due to surgery. So done done and done with this.

    Possible relocation is to Dallas??? Anyone from there???? How is it??? Another Colorado same question???

    I fell asleep during OC so didn’t see any of it yet. I plan on watching it on demand will comment later.

    • SharoninTexas says:

      I relocated to Texas 17 years ago from the DC area. The summers are hot but the winters are pretty good. There are a lot of great cities and towns around Dallas. Commutes can be tough, but we do have a light rail north of Dallas into the city not sure about south of Dallas. Another perk Texas has no state income tax, almost like a 7% increase in pay at least it was for us when we moved here from MD.

      • Lulu says:

        Nice!! I’ll take 7% more! What worries me is the bugs! I know its stupid but I heard in TX there are huge bugs. I’m a very squeamish person.

        • Lulu my family and I moved to Plano which is a suburb north of Dallas about 2 years ago. Don’t worry about the bugs. Way fewer bugs here then there were in Maryland (where we used to live) We love this area. Great house, great cost of living, great shopping and restaurants and things to do. The only beef I have with Texas is the default setting is to assume that if you are white you are also Christian and Conservative – which I’m not. It’s not offensive it just gets a little exhausting to have that assumption made all the time. (In Maryland no one assumes anything about your religion or your politics, too close to DC and they might be wrong!) But people here are generally very nice and the customer service is much better as well. Hope that helps!

          • Powell says:

            Sharonin & Brigid my 2nd cousin has lived all over the country. He lived here in MD before he went to Dallas about 10yrs now. He works at Tarrtan City College. He loves Dallas but remains loyal to the Washington Redskins. I was telling my mom the other day I’ve always wanted to go to Dallas. She said my/her cousin would love for me to visit him.

    • chismosa says:

      Oh Lulu sorry to hear this. Good luck to you and the family.
      I hope things work out for the best 😮
      Hope you and baby are doing well 👶👼

    • BB says:

      Sorry Lulu. There is nothing worse than trying to figure out what’s going to happen when your employer is going through downsizing and trying to guess what might happen. I know it’s hard, but try not to worry yourself sick about it. What’s gonna happen is gonna happen. Sorry I can’t tell you anything about Dallas (except I HATE the Cowboys – lol) or Colorado except I’ve visited there and it’s a beautiful state. Didn’t you say your husband doesn’t really like it where he is? Well, this may be a blessing in disguise.

      • Catseye says:

        Very often in life, the worst thing that happens, turns out to be the best thing that ever happened.

      • Lulu says:

        Thank you BB BTW haven’t had a chance to watch Newlyweds so won’t comment on that yet.

        Prior to my DH accepting this job. He was sooo excited. He spoke of purchasing a house, great schools for the kids etc. Then once we moved here. He hates it. He has a job to no where and it bothers him. To make matters worse I don’t have a future here as in my field the jobs are nonexistent. Or worse very low pay since it’s a college town. Luckily for us DH last month applied to many jobs. He foresaw what was happening and even has a telephone interview later this week. It’s just the details of breaking our lease as well as getting rid of our car. Last month DH wanted to buy a new car but since I already knew that we were planning on moving. I told him we would wait till we relocated. It’s just a pile of more crap on my shoulders.

        I do agree that when the worst thing happens it ends up being a blessing in disguise. (hopefully)

        • princesspindy says:

          I think the landlord moving to Fl is going to work in your favor!!!

        • shamrockblonde says:

          sorry to hear that Lulu – I think the worst part of all of this is the not knowing – my Mom used to tell us to always prepare for the worst, but to hope for the best – sounds like you were already doing that – just keep looking forward – you have your husband’s love, beautiful children and your health – already there are things very much in your favor no matter which path you end up on – just hold on tight have faith and keep your head – it will all work out – *hugs Lulu really hard*

    • jezzibel says:

      in norther TX you get something resembling 4 seasons…..Cities in TX are actually very cosmopolitan, and the people are generally nice, have a car problem and you have strangers coming out of the woodwork to help you, with no expectations of a reward…and plus…breakfast tacos.

    • TexasTart says:

      Lulu, sorry to hear if the uncertainty…that is some stress you do not need now. Hopefully the not knowing what will happen will be over with sooner than later! My sister lived near Dallas several years and she liked it there…not as much as Austin. Texas seems to have two seasons, summer and winter – and they can happen in the same week, lol. Summer is half the year, it is h.o.t. The people are the the best.

    • Stars99 says:

      Well, Lulu… I think you can probably live about anywhere as long as you’re with the right person… Each region has beauty of it’s own — it just may be a different kind of beauty than you’re used to. I used to hate the desert – but after visiting Tuscon several times at different times of the year, I can see its’ beauty… although I’m not so happy with the little creatures… but I digress! I pray you have some really awesome opportunities and that wherever you end up living will be “home” in no time at all! = )

    • Powell says:

      I am going to think positive thoughts that there will be no layoff for Mr. Lulu.

  12. jules says:

    Once again Starsy, thank you for taking one for the team. Your recaps are further proof that I will pull my hair out watching these so-called “grown-ups”. I had a much better time watching the Bruins beat the BlackHawks than the RHOC would have given me. You mentioned in your blog about how embarrassing it must be for Gretchen’s mom to watch this show. That has always been my thought as well. Although I am an adult, I still often think “what would my parent’s say” before I say or do something. I grew up not wanting to disappoint or embarrass my parents and still feel that way. Now that I’m a mom, I think the same thing about my kids…what would they think if they saw me do this? This stuff is out there forever and these women will have to explain to their children why they behaved like animals. It will be a “do as I say, not as I do” conversation. You’re right as well that these women are back in Kindergarten fighting over who’s your best friend.

    “Your Heatherness” cracks me up every time! It reminds me of a saying my mother has about people who think they’re special…she says ‘great, that makes you King Shit of the Cucca Tribe, congratulations”. That’s what I think about Heather when she talks about how different she is from these women. Thanks again for the recap Starsy, I appreciate it!

    • BB says:

      That’s funny what your mom says about people who get so full of themselves. I have heard that expression before but can’t remember where or when.

    • Overit! says:

      I do think slade is a totally d-bag but I do get sick of really skinny girls complaining that comments towards them are equivalent to teasing heavy girls. How could you even compare the two?! Take a look around…many bigger girls would give up anything to be thin!! However, I’m guessing Lydia would probably not want to wake up fat! While I do think no woman should be put down for her looks, I still just can’t wrap my head around how you could think making a comment about skinny girls is equal to calling someone fat!!

      • jules says:

        I understand your point Overit!. In my sister-in-law’s case, not only does she weigh about 93 pounds but she also looks very young (as does Lydia, IMHO). Again, that shouldn’t be a big deal but it can be. My s-i-l is about ten years younger than my brother but looks even younger than that. People always assume they are father and daughter. What bothers my s-i-l is that she isn’t taken seriously because of this. She is extremely well-educated and works her butt off but things come a little harder because she has to prove herself due to circumstances beyond her control. I actually have a few friends who have the same problems (sadly, I’m the jolly green giant next to them) and I know their feelings have been hurt by people saying things. It does seem silly to me but how you feel is how you feel.

        • designernailsdiana says:

          The worst comment I ever got was at church when I wore this cute denim jumper. I was thrilled to finally get one since it was all the rage. I’m not telling you how old I was, but I wanted that so bad. Well, this sweet lady comes over to my husband and I with our 3 kids and asks me “When are you due?” I looked at her and said “My baby is right her and she’s _ yrs old now” She turned bright red and said she was sorry. I threw that jumper away as soon as I got home. I’m fat so I’m not too surprised that she asked so I learned to NEVER assume when it came to women and bellies. If someone wants me to guess their age I ALWAYS guess younger than I think they really are because I’d hate to hurt someones feelings unintentionally (or as a RHW might say uninternationally).

          • jules says:

            Ugh, that’s awful designernailsdiana, My son did that to his pediatrician once. He was about five and just out of the blue asked “are you pregnant Dr….?” I swear I could feel all the oxygen being sucked from the room. Fortunately for us, she is a pediatrician with young children of her own so she was accustomed to being asked crazy questions. She just said “no, I just like chocolate too much” I never, ever ask a woman if she’s pregnant unless I know for certain because I can imagine how hurtful that would be.

            • Powell says:

              Diana & Jules I never ask a woman when she’s due or if she’s expecting either. I don’t want to embarrass her or myself.

      • princesspindy says:

        It still hurts feelings to be made fun of….it’s not like we don’t know we are skinny, don’t need it pointed out or made fun of…..I have gone thru periods of my life when my stomach was in really bad shape and to be asked if I was Anorexic was very hurtful, especially in front of a group of people…it’s embarrassing….skinny people have feelings too!!! lol!!

        • Overit! says:

          Of course skinny people have feelings! Sorry if you misunderstood…I just meant most heavy set girls that work hard to maintain their weight would just love to be called “skinny bitch” lol! But probably no one I know wants to be called a fatass! Jules- you make a good point about women like your sis in law and Lydia having a harder time being taken seriously bc they are small and very young looking. I guess I just have a hard time feeling TOO bad bc id love to have that problem :)))

          • jules says:

            You and me both Overit! I used to be skinny (before kids and menopause) but it’s been a long, long time since I’ve been called skinny. I would love to be insulted like that again LOL I keep telling my trainer that I have six-pack abs but they’re covered in fat so no one can see them! I was the same size as my sister-in-law in about 7th grade and I am not exaggerating. I’m at least six inches taller than her but sometimes I’m still jealous that she’s so freaking small! But as I remind myself when I’m feeling fat and blue, I don’t have a brain tumor, I’m not a mom in Africa dying from AIDS worrying about who will care for my kids when I’m gone or living in a country where war is raging day and night. Perspective is everything…..

      • Twinkle Toes says:

        While I agree that quite likely “many bigger girls would give up anything to be thin”, I don’t see how that negates a thin girl feeling insecure about being too thin and offended when her thinness is pointed out? Just because a chubby girl doesn’t understand how a thin girl could be insecure about being thin does not mean that the thin girl’s feelings should be invalidated by someone else. It’s not up to you to determine the validity of anyone else’s perception of themselves. Your excessive use of exclamation marks indicates that you obviously feel very strongly about this subject. Perhaps you should look at the reasons why this is such a highly charged issue for you.

        • I agree. I had several friends in high school who were very thin. It was their metabolism, not an eating disorder and they hated how too-thin they were. They suffered just as many negative and nasty comments as our heavy set friends did. NO one ever meant what they said to them as a compliment. BUT they would often try to hide behind their comment as if it were a compliment when really it was nasty, resentful and mean spirited. Jealousy is not a compliment, it’s just small minded.

          The young thing. For whatever reason I look quite young. Apparently I read about a decade younger than I am. Sometimes when this comes up it’s as a genuine lovely compliment from someone. But most of the time I get a nasty and envious snarky comment that is more about that person’s issues about THEIR age than my lack of wrinkles. I get so sick of it of people dumping their baggage on me because they are feeling bad about themselves.

          I think Lydia’s point is that his intention was not “nice”. He should have just said “you caught me! Sorry!” and that would have been the end of it. Instead he dug in. Mistake.

          • Oh one more thing. Did Lydia really say that she’s never been made fun of for being thing? I don’t believe her. She was so on top of his comment so quickly, she was so articulate that it seems to me like she’s had experience with that sort of thing and it’s a bit of a sore topic with her. Just my .02

            • not THAT Jill says:

              The feeling I got from the whole Slade/Lydia thing was that Lydia was more insulted that Slade said “cheeseburger” under his breath-if he said out loud”I’m going to call her cheeseburger” I think she would have just thought he was an idiot and moved on but the fact that he tried to be sneaky about it rubbed her the wrong way. That just my opinion-she clearly doesn’t like the whispered remarks-as we learned from the limo scene in Mexico. I don’t blame her-more people should be called out for that fake whisper behavior!!!

              • I agree I would’ve called him out too!

              • Dixie says:

                Agreed! I also think that when Lydia called Slade out on it, what really made her mad was instead of apologizing to her, he tried to make it seem like she could not take a joke. There is a reason why he is called Slimey.

                • not THAT Jill says:

                  YES!!!! Dixie-so true-all she wanted was for him to admit he was trying to be sly and cute-but he was too dumb to get it!!!

        • Overit! says:

          Its really not a highly charged issue….I have a tendency to overuse punctuation and smiley faces…especially online and texting 🙂 my husband always tells me it’s annoying but old habits die hard I guess! I’m a frequent lurker but I’m a mom of a preschooler and an RN who works long hours so usually the conversation is over by the time I read the blog so I don’t chime in. I’ve been on both ends of the spectrum- underweight and overweight and I felt the comments were much more hurtful when I put in extra pounds. I certainly would never negate someone else’s feelings….I was just curious what everyone else felt about it! Sorry if I hurt feelings…that would never ever be my intention! I guess my intent didn’t come across as I’d hoped in my first post! I totally agree with Lydia that “feelings can never be wrong”. however, how people handle their emotions is a different story altogether 🙂

          • Stars99 says:

            So glad you chimed in Overit… love your name, btw… I was a lurker for a very long time, too – before I started making any comments… I’m on the west coast so sometimes it does feel like the party is over before the shows even come on the air for us… so I tend to comment the next day… lol… But come on in… join in! It’s so great to hear different perspectives!

            • Overit! says:

              Thanks stars99! That’s really kind. I’m glad I’m not the only late night person 🙂

            • Laineylainey says:

              Stars are you in Cali? my daughter left n.hollywood at 2pm…her uncle and cousins are in garden grove…she got to garden grove at 5pm!!! It’s supposed to be a 55 min drive! Now she’s headed bak to .hollywood and as been in standstill traffic for 45 min. She’s getting closer I guess, she’s on the 5 now.

    • Stars99 says:

      Dies laffin’ at jules’ mom’s, “King S*** of the Cucca Tribe, congratulations!”… I may have to use that…lolol… And I’m not even going to talk about hokey…(scowls)… lolol… = )

    • Powell says:

      Jules I was telling my mom that is one reason why I believe so many kids & adults are in trouble or stay in trouble because they don’t think “what would my parents think”, also I like what you added to that, “what would my kids think”. I have always & continue to think “what would my mom think”. You’re right. You don’t want to disappoint or embarrass your parent or family. Lindsay Lohan, Amanda Bynes, Justin Bieber would serve themselves well if they thought, “what would my mom think”.

      • Sus says:

        I completely agree.

        I don’t know about Amanda or Justin’s family but this wouldn’t work in Lindsay Lohan’s case. Her parents are nuts!

        Lots of times these stars are supporting their entire families. That has to effect how the parenting or really not parenting works.

        • Powell says:

          That was the case for Lindsay. She has no money to even support herself now. But maybe if her mom had paid attention the 1st time maybe Lindsay would have thought “what would my mom think”.

  13. not THAT Jill says:

    Starzy you never disappoint!
    The OC bi*ches are turning on each other and I’m loving every bitchicilous minute of it!!! Gretchen is acting like a big ol’ honkin’ jellybelly cry baby!! Imagine being jealous b/c Tamra is friends with someone else??? I know-me either!!!! And how about gross Laurie announcing to the world that her daughter is friends with a hooker???? Really Laurie? It’s laughable!! They are all so dumb!! I love that Lydia called out Slade on the hamburger thing b/c I hate when people say sh*t under their breath and think its cute. Gretchen did the same thing to Lydia in Mexico and got called out on it-I love that Lydia isn’t afraid to speak up!! Slade and Terry were so gross having that convo about who was better in bed and I’m surprised Slade didn’t make Terry rate Heather!!!
    What the hell are indescpencies?? I’m about to unleash a wrath of furry on Gretchen’s dumb ass!!

    BB-great recap of Newlyweds!! I felt so bad for Tina with the miscarriage and all!! She really was looking for Tarz to feel some more emotion about it-she is going to realize that he feels terrible but is more concerned about her feelings about it than her own. I remember thinking Kevin wasn’t expressing his sense of loss about my miscarriage and later talking to him about it. I think it was just as hard on him as it was on me but he put his feelings second to mine-which I mistook at the time as him not caring as much…young and dumb!!! The whole thing with Tina’s dad was weird-I don’t know what the hell is going on with that!! Blair is still my fave even though I find him to be a bit whiney!!! John is a moron-plain and simple…a selfish lazy moron!! I still don’t like Alaska but I’m happy he planned the trip!!!

    🎈🎈🎈🎈🎉🎉🎉HAPPY BIRTHDAY DJPRINCESS!!!!🎉🎉🎉🎈🎈🎈🎈🎈

    • chismosa says:

      Jill you and I both had the balloons and confetti ready for DJ! Haha

      I completely agree with you on Blair and on Tarz. Completely.
      What an episode!

      Sidenote- I’m happy they didn’t go and induce Kathryn when she was a bit over her due date– all the hospitals around me and friends I know seem to have to have been induced if they were even 1 day over. We are among very induce-happy doctors here.
      Back in the “old days” you just waited it out.

      I’m sorry about your own miscarriage but you have a great family now so it’s all worked out. 💓💕👫
      I’m sure we’ll hear Tina is pregnant I think

      • not THAT Jill says:

        Thanks chimosa-I believe I got the children I was supposed to have
        I hope we hear that Tina is pregnant and that her dad ditched the chick!!
        Poor Kathryn-I was 2 weeks late with Annabelle and my doctor was not even having a talk with me about inducing-but a sonogram showed that she moved herself into full breech position…I ended up having a C-section and felt like I was pregnant for longer than Jessica Simpson!!!

        • chismosa says:

          Annabelle is such a pretty name. Awwww

          Yes, I understand inductions when needed- so I get that. Boy you really must have been READY!

          If Kim Kardashian went full term shed have overtaken the Jessica Simpson “award” lol

          • not THAT Jill says:

            Thnaks chimosa-Annabelle was my mothers names she was so proud when I named my daughter after her!!

        • chismosa says:

          Annabelle is such a pretty name. Awwww

          Yes, I understand inductions when needed- so I get that. Boy you really must have been READY!

          If Kim Kardashian went full term she’d have overtaken the Jessica Simpson “award” lol

        • Powell says:

          I believe you did too.

        • Powell says:

          I love Jessica Simpson but OMG it seems like she’s been pregnant for 10mths. I thought tge same thing when she was pregnant w/Max. She was in a friend’s wedding this pass weekend & she looked beautiful but miserable. Poor thing.

    • Stars99 says:

      lol Jill, the REAL Jill – Yes… it’s like watching a slow speed come apart… isn’t it? It’s really hysterical to me that Gretchen is obviously so jelly… If she was smarter, I would say she’s trying to manipulate Tamra – but I just don’t know that she has that kind of foresight. And what was up with Tamra actually offering to disinvite Alexis? Who offers to do that? What happened to, “This is who I am inviting and if you have a problem with it – don’t come!” Don’t even get me started on Terry and Slade… ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh…. I was going to post the link to the “Cheeseburger Song”… but didn’t… hmmm…lol

      • Stars99 says:

        In honor of last night’s RHOC Episode wherein Slade nicknamed Lydia, “Cheeseburger” I offer to you… “The Cheeseburger Song”… lololol

    • Powell says:

      Oooh. A new word JNNTJ. Bitchicilous. 🙂

      • not THAT Jill says:

        You like it Powell?? I usually go with “snarkalicious” on OC days but I wanted to mix it up a little….hahahaha!!!

        • Powell says:

          I love it. I love it when everyone comes up w/New ones. You, TexasTart, MTH & Stars have so so good imaginations coming up w/them. 🙂

    • Powell says:

      I don’t know what’s up with Tina’s dad. Last epi he told Tarz he lost his wife and now he’s lost Tina. I don’t think he would be happy w/Tina being married to anyone. He has said he wanted Tina to marry a man w/a regular job, Tarz works all the time. Tarz seems like he’s trying to get his biz to the top. To be able to provide for Tina & a family. What’s wrong w/that? That’s why I feel it doesn’t matter who Tina was married to. Her father wants her to his self so he can continue to mourn his wife w/just Tina.

  14. AZGirl says:

    Happy Birthday djprincess. Thank you Stars and BB for the recap.
    Lulu I hope things work out. I am curious about the landlord situation.

  15. Catseye says:

    I’m confused about Ryan and Briana. If he is only going to be 3hrs away (Palm Desert area maybe?), why can’t she just rent an apartment and move to where he’s going? I doubt that she’s going back to work.

    • jezzibel says:

      29 stumps is bad and the town around the main gate is GHETTO and full of meth makers/sellers….when I was there we were told to generally avoid the locals(trouble), but if you wanted to party Palm Springs was a 45 minute bus ride away

      • Catseye says:

        That’s horrible about the meth problem. It looks like that drug has taken hold all over our country.

        • jezzibel says:

          by town I mean a hotel 6, a few questionable restaurants/bars, strip joints & tattoo parlors +- a gas station or 2…there is nothing there except desert and more desert, and even less to legitimately do….more than once a live fire exercise has to be stopped because of some lost tweaker decides that a nighttime wander in the mojave is a scathingly brilliant idea and someone over that way sounds like they have fireworks(its actually a howitzer).I hate stumps..out of my 8yrs active I think I spent about a total of a 1 yr there for various combat I might be kind of biased about it.

    • Orson says:

      Because if they rented an apartment they’d have to spend his housing allowance on rent. And buy furniture. And pay utilities. Best thing for them would be for him to be stationed on the East coast.

    • jezzibel says:

      and trust me his housing allowance wouldn’t cover a tent in palm springs

    • Dixie says:

      If they are preparing to deploy, then Ryan probably couldn’t leave the base at night. Best he could do would be to get a weekend pass.

  16. Powell says:

    HA. “Color me surprised.”. Stars I love it when you say that. 🙂

  17. AZGirl says:

    I was not able to watch OC due to puppy duty around the pool. Love Stars recap. If Lydia did slam Slade for his comment that amen to her. He needs to be put in his place. She is thin but she is also young. From what I can tell she is very small boned so naturally she is thin.

    There is a way to recognize someone who has a serious eating disorder. Along with being very under weight they usually show signs of hair loss or very dull, dry, brittle hair. Second, the person’s nails are discolored or damaged. Skin is usually pale and shows signs of dryness.

    Due to lack of nutrients the hair and nails are damaged.
    @BB: Thanks for the Newlywed’s recap. I appreciate your time in watching the meltdown of 4 marriages.

  18. Powell says:

    Uh “indescrepancies”? Maybe indiscretions. Or is that just me &my high faulted ways? 😀

  19. Powell says:

    Another Miss USA moment for Gretchen.

    • TexasTart says:

      At least she doesn’t let us down and just keep giving us more ‘material’ to work with, ha.

  20. Nancy says:

    Happy Birthday dj. 🙂 I hope it’s a great one.

  21. princesspindy says:

    ^^^^^Gretchen wants to know what that’s supposed to mean. I’m surprised that Gretchen didn’t understand it – “Okay, I’ve seen who you are” are all monosyllabic words except for the “okay” part… You don’t think that the word “okay” actually tripped her up, do you?^^^^^

    HARDEE HAR HAR!!! Thanks Stars for all the laughs, this one made me startled the puppies, I have learned to keep the coffee mug on the table when I read…..funny, funny, funny, and thanks for the shout out, you did a great job, IPPHO!

    BB, thank you for recapping Newlyweds, I can’t watch, I tried but I can’t, and now I don’t have to!!!!

    • Stars99 says:

      Does the royal wave towards Tiara – lol… For some reason, it’s just gotten so much fun to snark at Gretchen… she always provides some irresistible material. I’ve watched season 1 of RHOC last week… and Slade was the original famewhore from the very beginning. He had more airtime than most of the housewives. I was surprised that he was like a vice-president (or something like that) to a now defunct Title Company – one that didn’t have a particularly good reputation, I might add… at least not here… lol

  22. shamrockblonde says:

    thanks Stars – you know how much I love TBBT!! – the reference was perfect!!! – watching Gretch’s face as Lydia and Slimey went back and forth was almost sad – she started out thinking they were all having this nice convo, and then she began to realize that something was not right – at all – and that it was getting worse – and STILL she did not understand – I said a prayer for her Mom – and I think Gretch is becoming more aware that Tammy is not going to remain a friend for long – and she is really scared that she will end up on the outside looking in – I also cannot wait till Heather sees the tape of her tool husband and that slimeball comparing Lauri and Gretch in bed – Gretch will be happy that she beat out Lauri, but Heather – I expect – no I want – her to go ballistic – for once her evilness will be used for good!!

    • Orson says:

      Poor Gretchen. Imagine if Tamra shut her out. The pain and misery! Sort of like Alexis felt when Gretchen shut her out, right?

      • shamrockblonde says:

        poor and Gretchen – in the same sentence…. *hugs Orson really hard*
        she will never make that connection – and that is truly sad –

    • Stars99 says:

      lol Shamrock – I love that quote… “My Ken will kick your Barbie’s ass”…from BBT… it always cracks me up… It actually came to mind to use it way before the end of the show where Lydia actually called Gretchen “Malibu Beach Barbie”… the whole cyclical nature of the reference just made me giggle… OMG… can you imagine the Dubrow household last night? You KNOW that Terry glossed over what he said before the airing of the episode… I’m thinking he might hafta sleep in their closet for a few nights… but then again, that’s bigger and swankier than my entire house! lol

  23. designernailsdiana says:

    Stars99 BEST LINE EVER (well today anyway) “maybe these coats are the “wrath of furry” that Gretchen was talking about”

    • Stars99 says:

      Smiles at Designernailsdiana – It cracked me up that they were wearing fur coats… I couldn’t resist the “wrath of furry” reference… I almost brought up onion rings for Terry… but I was so disgusted with Terry last night that I decided he didn’t deserve onion rings. lolol

  24. AZGirl says:

    Just thinking about how crazy that scene must have been with Tina and Tarz meeting Daddio’s girlfriend. Yikes! Khan is a prick. Poor Tina. Andy C. even had a reaction.

    • not THAT Jill says:

      It was all so strange…he seemed so straight-laced and then BAM….he is all handsy with some chick….so odd

      • Orson says:

        He was playing up to his daughter. He wanted to punish her for marrying someone and abandoning him 2 years or more after his wife died and leaving him all alone.

        • AZGirl says:

          Very good point!!!! I believe that is exactly what he is doing. What an asshole. Reminds me of FIL (who thankfully lives in another state now)

        • chismosa says:

          That’s what I said yesterday it would be.
          I wonder if it does pan out to that.

          I initially thought it was a ploy against Tina
          Who knows ?

  25. Contessa says:

    Stars and BB – thank you for the wonderful play by play reports on the shows! Awesome of both of you to take the time to do this, as it is so enjoyable for the rest of us!

    I am so glad that Lydia called out slick slade; his is a pos when it comes to women. I am also happy she made the assertion about Vicki’s surgery and his comments about her nose in his stupid routine. Slade is not a gentleman, he is a PIG – and I think Lydia knows all the back-stories and was just waiting for an opportunity to rain some hell on him with regard to his disrespect for women. Good for Lyia. Slick and the doc were disgusting talking about rating Lauri and Gretched – who does that past 17 years old, publicly on TV???? I wonder how ms. heather feels about this today?

    I don’t know why it is such a big deal to everyone on OC about Vicki seeing Brooks, she doesn’t discuss it that much and they do not see one another all the time. It really isn’t anyone’s business. For Lauri to say her daughter’s friend is a hooker – nice Lauri? However Lauri is another one that was always looking for someone to support her ugly ass anyway. I wonder how manface feels about Slade saying he didn’t date, they only hung out – slang for I was only banging the beyotch and not spending any money on her wining and dining.

    Gretched is trash, simply garbage and on top of that she murders the english language. The girl cannot get her words straight. She also honks through her nose all the time. That get up with the fish nets for Salsa night was stupid, that is not how one dresses for salsa. Also you do not tell a bride who she can invite to her dress party – that is her day and her party. Telling someone you are unhappy with their choice is very selfish. Also did anyone notice the puss on Gretched when Slade was telling her his son needed another surgery? The look was pure disdain and boredom. I wanted to slap her at that moment.

    • not THAT Jill says:

      I ❤ you Contessa!!
      slang for banging the beyotch and someone to support her ugly ass!!! Both statements have me cracking up!!!!

    • princesspindy says:

      Great comment, and yes I did notice that face, it was the face of evil!!

    • Stars99 says:

      Waves at the Contessa! Yeah, I’m liking Lydia that she calls people the moment she sees something go down – instead of waiting until they leave and talking about them behind their backs. I think she’s totally done, done, DONE with Gretchen and Slade! He was out of his league in talking with Lydia, actually… He’s so used to dealing with Gretchen that he forgot how most women actually can form coherent sentences and have fully developed reason and logic skills. I do reserve the right to harass Lydia about her hairbands, though. lol

    • Laineylainey says:

      Love this post…but…who is manface? Gretchen, right?

  26. Contessa says:

    MTH – I didn’t post yesterday, but thank you again for a wonderful recap of the NJ craziness. I don’t even know what to say anymore except that Mel is a pos. She married into a traditional, old-fashioned Italian family. She knows that when a FIL goes into hospital to ICU, the family is expected ASAP. Heck that would be normal for most families that are that small in numbers. I ran when my late MIL or FIL were in the hospital, and my ex and I spelled each other being with them. It is common sense. She should have gone ASAP and if she was sick with her “sore throat” could have just been in the background and said – forget the nonsense what can I do to help? That is what most normal families would do in this situation. However it is always about Mel and how much she suffers at the hands of Tre. Pipsqueak Mego is another POS in my book…he can be friends with his sister, withou involving his wife – they can agree about not talking about those issues and go forward. Lots of people do this. Well we all know Mel leads him around by his little itty bitty member that he is so anxious to show everyone.

    • melthehound says:

      I see pretty much the same thing, Contessa (thank you for catching up here).. ON the Show… I don’t believe any of them were sick. The layer of lies from the Jr Gorgas is so tall, with blogs, WWHL appearances, and the show itself, I can barely keep track of it. Even if we assume that they rushed to the hospital that night or the next day, which I don’t think they did, what I saw on the show was, sickly Joey saying his father was TAKEN to the hospital, their mother acknowledging that he was taken by ambulance, and then the victim saying she and her daughter were there the next day. She further said that Joey had taken his father to the hospital (while crippled over with flu himself).

      Teresa says that she talked to her father and MeGo hadn’t gone. She didn’t mention Joey but I heard, perhaps on WWHL, that at some point He was in the hospital too (To me, on the show, he didn’t look like someone who belongs in a hospital.. It looked like someone play acting for the cameras). Over the course of the show, her story changed 3 or 4 times, about something that happened no more than a week before. She Can Not be so busy that she couldn’t remember something like that, IF it had really happened. Dead give away of a liar. Teresa says in her blog that Gia’s party was a week after Papa Gorga was put in the hospital. He woke up something like 2 or 3 days after being put in there. It was then, she says, she asked him if Melissa had been there. He said he couldn’t remember if she had or not. Keeping with what T said, even a phone call would have sufficed, Nothing. I will give that it’s possible, MeGo was there while the old man was asleep and no one else was around and while she was being chased around by imaginary ghosts (s4 reference).. If phone call would have sufficed (according to Teresa), scratchy throat or not, she could have let her finger do some dialing.

      The reality is, IMO, they so despise Teresa that, dying father or not which, for all anyone knew, he was, they don’t want to be in the same room with Teresa. The actuality is, this show is so neatly packaged for story, I don’t believe any of it happens they way they (Bravo Inc.) say it did. Cusi77 said to us yesterday, want to know the size of the lie, measure the length of the excuse. MeGo’s entire time on that show was one big changing excuse. Forget about eye twitches, lip licks, or any of these other ‘tells’.

      • iceNfire says:

        Tre is wrong in saying that when her parents pass the most important relationship in her life will be her brother but she needs to recognize that her brother’s wife has a family that she will not be a part of if she doesn’t accept M now. Unlike the Icky One in OC who always seems to ‘win’ Tre isn’t so lucky

        • melthehound says:

          Go back to my recap where I remind Teresa of the Joe sitting to her left when she said that. By extension, her 4 daughters. I also said that Teresa is about Extended family, and Joey, is about immediate family. I don’t think though that Teresa meant the others aren’t important to her. We are taking that too literally.

          • iceNfire says:

            I’m still going back to drv. You keep writing ;TAKEN’ but I dont hear it so I haveto put closed captions on ….but have to finish burning, i mean cooking chicken first 🙂

  27. shamrockblonde says:

    Contessa!! – two brilliant posts!! – agree 110% and then some!!!!

  28. TexasTart says:

  29. TexasTart says:

    Ana Quincoces will be on “The Chew” on ABC, Wednesday.

  30. Amalfi says:

    Just saw Josh (is that his name … Lauri’s kid) have to talk about his drug use with a therapist as a storyline. Yuk. No wonder she quit, if that is why.

  31. Buttercream says:

    Happy Birthday djprincessc!

    Mel, great recap .. had me in stitches with the “color me surprised” .. too funny!
    It’s raining and thundering here today! New landscaped plants my daughters and I planted in the last two weeks!
    Hope everyone is well!

  32. TexasTart says:

    OT: I saw parts of the Daytime Emmys on HLN the other day. How strange that was on the Headline News Channel. What I saw of it was a horrible production, I really could not believe. They gave a presenter the wrong envelope to announce a winner. Some people departing the stage didn’t have a clue where to go and wandered aimlessly. They failed to bleep the F word and the S word and of all things that was during a memorium tribute to Jeanne Cooper. I imagine the FCC will fine them big time for that. They had camera on wrong people at the right time, like someone, thanked their husband and they had the camera on someone who was NOT her husband. Ackward! They had some dumb couch on stage to interview the winner – immediately after their too long acceptance speech. Ackward. My guess is lots of people got fired that night.

    Was looking at red carptet pics. Bethanny was there. Which makes sense as she will have her own daytime show this fall. The Grifter (Taylor) was there. WHY?! I am sure one could buy tickets and go to these things; but she seemed so out of place with her lingerie look – and those lips. Yeah, she brought them too, blech.

    • Boobah says:

      Hey there, TT! I caught some of that show. That was a horrible production! It was almost laughable.
      Dumb luck had it that I saw the segment where Bethenny presented. She seemed nervous a little but overall I thought she did well. She presented more than one award, and she had to accept an award on someone’s behalf (I’m sorry, I forgot who) and she was pretty funny about it – she pretended to be the winner and launched into how she wanted to thank such-and-such, etc. It was cute.

      • TexasTart says:

        Hey Boobah! I didn’t know she was a presenter – I missed that part! Glad she could make a funny out of that.

    • Powell says:

      TexasTart I watched maybe the 1st hr. I can’t watch any awards show all the way to the end anymore. I was only watching to see if they did anything special for Jeanne Cooper’s passing. That was Iesha Tyler from The Talk that got the wrong envelope but she handled it. I was happy to see who won. It was soooo strange having it on HLN. The awards used to come on Fridays on ABC.

      • Powell says:

        There are only 4 soaps on tv now. The networks really don’t want soaps anymore so I think they didn’t bid to have the Emmy’s on their network. I won’t be surprised if it’s on TBS next yr.

        • TexasTart says:

          That is so strange networks are not interested. There are many categories outside of soaps. Must be all about ratings, not enough people watch – especially on a Sunday night!

  33. iceNfire says:

    Does anyone know if Slade’s older son (the one that played guitar with Jo) has a different mother than Grayson? Why such a big age difference between the sons?

  34. shamrockblonde says:

    the not bleeping will result in huge fines and probably someone’s job – a live show is no joke especially when you have people cursing – at least at MTV shows you expect the cursing and are more prepared to hit the button, but for daytime tv soaps, the curses were probably unexpected and caught the one in charge of hitting the buzzer by surprise – there is only a two second delay and even though there is a script to follow, the actors rarely adhere to the script – it can be truly frightening to be sitting there with your hand over the button knowing that one mistake will cost your company a huge fine –

  35. lillybee says:

    Wrechen (ty to TWOP and Project Runway has become the most horrible HW.

  36. TexasTart says:

    So Lydia called herself the Friendship Whisperer?! What a trip! I had thought Stars made that up until I read otherwise! HA! We just hope Lydia doesn’t have to turn into the Friendship Screamer before her stint with the OC bitches is over. A “Friendship Summit” sounds so classy to the NJ “SIT DOWN!” eh?! The coats = The Wrath of Furry! LOL! And the ending of Stars recap was terribly funny with the playground scenario.

    Seems to me the ONLY respectable man on on this show is Doug? Let’s hope Doug and Lydia can remain true to themselves long enough we can enjoy them before they are labeled ‘boring’ and sent packing. Honestly, those men can say whatever they want, but to think that they had that conversation and KNEW they were on camera puzzles me. It screams famewhore – which is fitting of Slade, but a doctor? I just can not believe Slade kept pushing it when sounds that Lydia made it clear she didn’t appreciate what he was saying….what a complete asshat…all of those guys…but Doug, of course…and I would like to see him in red pants, lol. 🙂

    • Orson says:

      I think the coats, more properly, should be called the “wraps of furry”.

      • TexasTart says:

        Yes, it could! Orson, I thought of you when I saw a news story on the training that people were going through for the Coast Guard and what a dangerous job that can be. They had such elaborate, high tech facilities to train people these days. They proclaim to be the best trained for water rescue, perhaps in the world. I don’t remember whether it was based in South or North Carolina. It’s such a long and rigorous training program that of the 18 accepted only 2 in the group would complete the program to become members of the Coast Guard. Well, probably not ‘news’ to you, but it aired on NBC Nightly News and might be online.

        • Orson says:

          That could have been SAR or some other special school. Recruit training is in Cape May, NJ, and the Academy is in New London, CN last I heard.

      • Shiny says:

        I think “wraps of furry” was really “rats of furry” – Gretchen gets her words so mixed up, and she was trying to say “furry rats”. But was she talking about throwing bad coats at people or talking about the women themselves…when her words get combined and inverted, I can get so confusioned.

  37. windycitywondering2 says:

    Happy Birthday DJPrincess – enjoy it and do something special.
    Thank you Stars99 for your OC recap (I don’t watch it, don’t hate me!) and BB for the Newlyweds recap. Tina’s father’s dinner behavior was all kinds of creepy! He can go have dinner with John and Alaska – more shining examples of men to avoid at all costs. My heart breaks for Blair and the fairytale life he so wants to create for Jeff.

  38. boston02127 says:

    Happy Birthday djprincessc!

  39. boston02127 says:

    Pray to St. Jude. I’ll will too.

  40. boston02127 says:

    Great blogs guys, thanks!

    • Powell says:

      How’s Walmart treating you so far this week Boston? 🙂

      • boston02127 says:

        Walgreens…….like it makes a difference. 😦
        I can’t wait to get back to school.
        Who would of thunk it?

        • Powell says:

          Oh Walgreens. I’ve never been to one. There isn’t one in my immediate area. LOL about saying you can’t wait til school starts. I remember feeling like that. I couldn’t wait til papers & finals were over to be done w/it & be able to spend time w/family & friends but after a while I couldn’t wait to get back to it. I don’t know about you but I loved getting a new notebook & pens for school. By July I would have my supplies for the fall semester. 🙂

  41. TexasTart says:

    #jellybean – HA!

  42. Powell says:

    Watching OC. You all are right. Vicki’s hair does look nice. And Slade is an ass.

    • looneylucy says:

      Thanks Nancy. One of my dogs began having gastrointestinal problems a few yrs ago. Vet put her on “sensitive stomach” dog food. Nothing changed. She was suffering badly. I finally said to heck with all canned & dry food. I cook and grind turkey meat, along with cooked carrots, sweet potatoes and brown rice. They’re both thriving and no longer does my one old girl suffer. I bag it into 2-3 days worth of food in freezer bags. Funny thing..if my grown teen can’t find anything he wants to eat in the fridge or pantry, he’ll fill a bowl up with “dog food” and heat it in the microwave. Then I jump on his butt for “eating all the dog food!”.

      • Nancy says:

        Hi lucy,
        We did the same thing for our pug and she lived to be 19. 🙂
        Glad to hear both of yours are doing better. It’s so hard to see a dog in so much pain.

      • Laineylainey says:

        That is great loony Lucy! Long time no see! Nice to see you here again!

        • looneylucy says:

          Hi Nancy and Lainey! Thanks for your response. We love our pound dog. She had a rough life before us and we’re happy to accommodate her. She’s such a lover girl.

          So proud for Lainey girl, Lainey. Mine’s one year behind yours. Proud and worried. I understand. What a beautiful daughter you have. Your son ain’t no slouch either in his pursuits!

          Ms. Nancy, I know the loss of Emily is great for you and your husband, but she is not hurting now. And the next rescue Pug is waiting for you both.

      • chismosa says:

        Hi Lucy, I went through the dog version of IBS with one of my dogs —
        I worry because he is good now (takes psyllium fiber at both meals), and eats the regular dog food. I’m trying to buy the very limited ingredient / different protein stuff and all that is CLEARLY made in the US. It’s hard
        I know for my next dog I want to cook for them.

        I wish there was a nice cookbook for dogs, I believe LADebra– or LAChica? Sent me some info on here. I hope to see her here again to chat about this.
        You give me inspiration to cook for the dogs, just wanted to let you know ! 😀 😄

  43. Amalfi says:

    Watching the rerun… what a trashbag Slade is talking about Laurie. Pleather’s husband may have brought it all up and egged it on, but Slade brought up how he dated Laurie when he could’ve just left it as he knew her. Then he took it to we never really dated we hung out. Vomit. What an attention whore. And regular whore. Ohhh.. .watching Lydia tell him off. Gotta go.

  44. Powell says:

    No Gretchen did you not get attention as a child cause you sure were up in arms cause Tamra was talking to Vicki. You grow the hell up.

  45. Powell says:

    Eddie has on his muscle shirt lookingike an instructor. At least they are havg fun dancing.

  46. Powell says:

    STFU Gretchen & Slade.

  47. Powell says:

    Uh huh. I see. Gretchen is 12yrs old. She doesn’t want Tamra to invite Alexis wedding gown shopping or become friends w/Vicki again cause she wants Tamra all to herself. I watched a recent Dr. Phil epi where this lady was obsessed w/another lady that is now her former friend. The former friend said she would text her over 500 times a mth. She would text she loved her, can’t wait to see her, loves her smile, coffee doesn’t taste the same w/o her in her life, she can’t live w/o her. And so much more. Dr. Phil had planned on having both the ladies on stage to discuss the issue but decided against it for the former friend’s safety. He told the lady she can get help w/her problem & to stay away from the former friend. When the former friend came out Dr Phil told her he told the lady to not contact her & that if she did to really consider taking out a restraining order. That the lady is a stalker. Is Gretchen a stalker?

  48. Powell says:

    So next week the ladies will be talking about Gretchrn & Laurie will tm Vicki about Brooks dating her daughter’s friend. So is this why Laurie is on this season to rub it in Vicki’s face that Brooks is a liar & loser? It’s true IMO but is that her motive?

  49. rabblerouser2010R says:

    Thanks for the blogs ladies. Again Stars, if the show was actually one fraction as entertaining as your blog…I would probably tolerate it. Isn’t strange when the actual show somehow does the blog about it an injustice.

    The way the stars (no pun intended) seem to be lining up, it looks like by the end of the season or next season it will be Gretchen who is going to be the one to be ‘froze out’. She doesn’t get along with Vickie or Alexis; now she has been having some bumps with Heather and Lydia…not to mention we all know the friendship with Tamra is a farce.

    Not to mention, I am not buying Tamra’s kinder and gentler act for a second. It would take a clockwork orange type of contraption with a straight jacket and eye prods to get me to watch it….and even then …i would be playing something inside my head to try and escape it.

    • Powell says:

      RR isn’t it funny how slowly Gretchen isn’t getting along w/anyone. Next weeks epi shows the others talking about Gretchen. So if Heather gives her tge speech “If everyone tells you you’re dead. You need to lie down” or whatever she’s says is Gretchen going to gracefully take it as constructive criticism?

    • Stars99 says:

      Glad you read the blog even though you don’t watch the show… I think once we got through last week’s episode… it has to be all smooth sailing from here… lol

  50. Donna says:

    I find it interesting that after it was noticed that Teresa mispronouces words now others are now doing it. I am mighty suspicious that they are doing it for attention.

  51. boston02127 says:

    Can-not-stand-Abby Lee Miller. I want to slap that big basketball face of hers.

  52. Nancy says:

    boston..I found this today. They replace a violin with a recorder and I like it.

  53. Nancy says:

    Boston…Here are a few choices you might like.

  54. BB says:

    Hey, guys. Remember the prancercise lady? She’s in a new John Mayer video.

    • Amalfi says:

      BB – that is a pretty song, and the video is a total mockery of the content… John is a smart cookie if it is about her. lol.

  55. lillybee says:

    I just got a scammy email supposedly sent out by the FBI director stating that I am owed three hundred million by some Kenyans. I can only get it if I send someone almost 200.00.

  56. not THAT Jill says:

    Ewwwww Kelly is super annoying on WWHL….she thinks she is very important…. And smart.

    • Stars99 says:

      Wow, really? Who told her that?

      • not THAT Jill says:

        I think she made it up in her own mind…now she is rooting for Bethenny b/c she heard Bethenny donated money to the Red Cross after Hurricane Sandy…she acted like Bethenny did it as a factor to her…she is a very odd duck

  57. TexasTart says:

    Named Gigolo for a reason…

  58. kokuanani says:

    *** Vicki says that Troy is currently at 29 Palms and will come home on the weekends until he gets deployed. ***

    Isn’t Troy the baby? Ryan is the dad who’ll be deployed.

  59. Nancy says:

    dj…I hope you had a wonderful birthday today. 🙂

  60. lillybee says:

    nite all

  61. djprincessc says:

    Thank you all for the kind wishes! Hello Kitty and I had a great day today!! I am so thankful to have found a wonderful place like this to share all the ups and downs of life! Besides all the crazy housewife drama!! Xoxo!! I hope you all see this!

    • djprincessc says:

      2 more years until 30 and then…BOTOX! LOL! 😦

      • Noelle says:

        Happy Birthday djprincessec!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Belated!!)
        My oldest is a HUGE HELLO KITTY fan!
        On my way to pick up my girls from airport…. !!!Happy Dance!!!

      • Noelle says:

        Hope it was a good one!
        Happy 28th!!
        BOTOX……BISH please! 😉
        Leaving NOW!! F%ck!!
        GBF’s are worse than women….in my case!

    • TexasTart says:

      LOL! Glad to hear you had a wonderful birthday with Hello Kitty! 😀

    • chismosa says:

      Happy happy DJ! You are young! Enjoy it!
      Hugs. xoxox

    • LaineyLainey says:

      I see you, on your post birthday!!! So glad you had a great day on your bday,…I hope you’ll be extending your birthday into the weekend!!! Milk it for all it’s worth!!!

  62. Noelle says:

    Finally! GRRR….

  63. melthehound says:

    Good Morning. It looks like NMD is still in cyber darkness. Here is the new blog.

  64. NJBev says:

    Dear @Starrs99.What a great blog.
    And I mean great. I Just read it again and realized what it
    “was” about the blog that was so “comforting”
    You had an opinion. a very funny opinion-
    You reminded me of Lynn.
    And I am crying- why am I so emotional?

  65. NJBev says:

    Happy Birthday DJPrincess!!!!!!
    Hope it was awesome. You are a very
    cute yet extraordinarily opinionated 28 yr old.
    God Bless You, You could have been me
    at that age!!!! Or I may have been you
    at that age!! Anyway ENJOY that age!!
    CUZ when you sneeze, you will be some
    “50 something” woman telling an adorable
    “20 something” woman to enjoy that age!!!!

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