Tarz and Tina: (Married 11 months, 2 weeks) In LA, Tina is meeting her dad in an empty hookah lounge in the middle of the afternoon because he has something important to tell her. Tina calmed herself down with some whiskey before she arrived so she wouldn’t act so pissed at him because of the last time she saw him (making out with Heather at dinner). He hasn’t been communicating with Tina and Tarz since that dinner but tries to make it seem that Tina and Tarz haven’t had time for him. Tina’s dad tells her he’s getting married. Tina gets all upset and says something about Heather being pregnant and they are getting married. Her dad says Heather is not pregnant. Tina breaks down and tells him he lost his wife, but she also lost her mom and had a miscarriage and he only cares about himself, not her. Tina tells him she doesn’t want to hear about his stupid marriage to Heather and he yells back that it’s not Heather. He tells her he’s marrying a lady named Seema, and Tina goes all berserk and starts clapping her hands and says that’s her sister’s name. She loses it. He loses it and says he can’t even enjoy a cup of coffee without his late wife and he wants to live again. Tina is upset he’s marrying someone without even asking her or letting her know about it. She’s never heard about it and has never met her. Her dad says she will make a beautiful mom for her and she tells him to eff off. He talks about her new mother and it will be like before. Her dad asks her to give this woman a break. Tina tells him good luck, have fun because she’s not going to be there.
Tarz and Tina are at the doctor where Tina finds out whether her fibroids caused her to have the miscarriage. They do a tans-vaginal ultrasound and Tina is freaking out about maybe having cancer. They see a couple of small fibroid tumors and they are not serious. She can get pregnant and carry a baby to term. They are ecstatic.
Tina and Seema, her dad’s fiancé, are getting ready for the wedding. She just met her the day before. Seema is no Heather. She is a widow and also Indian. Tina gets Tarz alone and tells him she feels good about her dad and his new bride because they seem compatible. Tina says she feels she dragged Tarz into so much drama that first year. They tell each other they don’t how they would live without the other even though the first year of marriage wasn’t anything like they expected. Tarz and Tina have fun at her dad’s wedding. One month later, Tina does another pregnancy test and it’s positive. They are expecting a baby boy.
John and Kathryn: (Married 9 months 1 week) Kathryn and John are at the hospital about to deliver the “honeymoon” baby. After pushing a while with no baby, Kathryn has to have a c-section. Four days after delivery, they are in Kathryn’s room. Kathryn is feeding the baby and John is eating because he’s starving. John is talking about what he went through during the delivery. Kathryn cannot believe it after what she went through. John says it’s all about her all the time and he wants a moment. It was very traumatic for poor John watching the c-section. Kathryn says John was great and really took charge the day of the delivery. They take Dean James home and John thinks he’s going to be a great dad.
8 weeks after delivery, John comes home from work where Kathryn is holding the sleeping baby. John is glad the baby is asleep. Kathryn wants to go out that night to the store without the baby. John tells her she can have one hour only. He doesn’t like to be alone with the baby. The tanning salon is doing great and John credits Kathryn with running it well. John is hurt that the baby is getting more attention than him.
After one year of marriage, the pool table is being moved to the basement. They both feel they won. John still has the pool table but it’s been moved from the room Kathryn didn’t want it in. John is reluctantly changing the baby’s poopy diaper and Kathryn says she is so happy with her two boys. John advises not having a baby the first year you’re married. Kathryn agrees but says she wouldn’t change a thing. They’ve been on the fast track since they met. John can’t believe they’re spending their first anniversary with a crying baby.
Blair and Jeff: (Married 11 months 3 weeks) Blair and Jeff are in Malibu meeting with Dr. Stewart, a sex therapist. Blair tells the blond bombshell he didn’t know he was going to have a therapy session with Miss Texas. Jeff says he’s ready to get raked over the coals because he thinks it’s his issue. When they first met they had crazy chemistry and Blair didn’t want to be one of those couples who had less sex after marriage. They were doing it every day, sometimes twice a day, for the first six to nine months of their relationship. The therapist tells them that’s pretty hot and heavy. Jeff says “is it?” Dr. Stewart says “Come on, that’s a lot of sex.” Blair said it suddenly drastically decreased to about once a week or every other week. Jeff says it was consuming planning the wedding and stuff and he put in on the back burner. Jeff and Blair are both pleasuring themselves, but not each other. Jeff will go without pleasuring himself for three or four days just to get the urge to have sex with Blair. This really hurts Blair. The doctor asks Jeff if he misses sex and he says not really, he’s fine with it once a week. Jeff and the doctor feel Jeff holding back is a product of his childhood where he had to do what his parents wanted no matter what and now he feels the same way with Blair and the fact that he wants it his way or the highway.
Blair and Jeff go into the doctor’s exercise room (like a bedroom) and she asks them to do some role playing with Blair playing Jeff and Jeff playing Blair while the doctor watches. Jeff feels Blair’s (playing Jeff) rejection. Blair felt he just wanted to be left alone by Jeff (playing Blair). The doctor tells them they both need to make changes. Then they do a second exercise where they role play each other but act the way they want the other one to act instead of how they really are. It somehow helped them, especially Jeff. Blair gets emotional about it because he wants to see Jeff happy with the way his life has turned out. They have a moment. Jeff says Blair has taught him to listen more and be compassionate. Blair has learned he’s kind of needy (kind of?). They are a work in progress and are striving to better themselves. They are in it for the long haul.
Alaska And Kim: (Married 11 months, 3 weeks) Kim and Alaska are finally having their honeymoon and are flying in from separate coasts to meet at the Four Seasons Resort in Riviera Nayarit, Mexico. They have been mostly apart for the first year of their marriage and Kim is very excited they get to spend some time together with no distractions. Kim is hoping there is no emotional distance between them by the end of the honeymoon.
They arrive for a dolphin adventure, but Kim is panicky about it. They get into the water with the dolphins and Kim freaks out. Alaska is petting the dolphins and trying to get Kim to touch them. They finally get to ride the dolphins. Kim never gets comfortable around them. Kim and Alaska have never showered together but Kim has always wanted to and Alaska has not. After the dolphin adventure, they finally take a shower together in an outdoor shower. The water is cold and won’t get warm. The take a shower together with their clothes on under cold water. I don’t think this is what Kim had in mind but Alaska feels like he’s done his duty. Later, they both get some type of spa treatment where they have to shower off together. Kim finally gets her shower moment and Alaska wonders why he didn’t ever want to shower with her in the first place.
Kim and Alaska feel like they’ve fallen back in love with each other on the honeymoon. On their last night, they are having a romantic dinner on the beach. Alaska is going back to LA and Kim is going back to New York. Alaska thinks they will make it even though they are separated. He likes the feeling they are dating and thinks it makes their marriage stronger. Kim doesn’t need to hear that Alaska still looks at her like his girlfriend instead of wife, even though he says she’s his forever girlfriend. She thought they would be in a better place after a year of marriage and can see they will still be working stuff out the second year.
The Newlyweds were all on Watch What Happens Live. Tina’s boobs are about to fall out of her top. All the couples are still together. Snippets from the show about each couple are shown.
First Jeff and Blair. Andy asks Jeff about his relationship with his family. They got a not so nice letter from them after the first episode. It’s sad things are not any better with his family. Andy asks how their sex life is going. Blair tells them about having food poisoning after they got home from the therapist. They say it’s a lot better. Blair says something about enemas and even Andy is grossed out.
Next are Kathryn and John. Andy asks them about people thinking John is rude and selfish and if he has any regrets. John has regrets and feels bad about how he treated Kathryn. Kathryn says they don’t take each other too seriously and she knows he loves her. Kathryn says John is a great dad.
Next are Kim and Alaska. Alaska is not trying to turn Kim into his mom. He says he’s definitely a jerk and he just found out Kim keeps her money separate. Alaska does not dominate Kim. Kim is independent and lets Alaska lead.
Next are Tina and Tarz. Tina and Tarz have a two week old baby boy and she looks fantastic. You would never know it by looking at her. She had the baby six weeks early and they can’t tell the name because US Weekly is paying them to reveal the name the next day. By the way the name Tarz David. They are not in touch with Tina’s dad much. He’s married but Tina says he hasn’t done any healing. It’s sad.
Poll Results: Which couple will last the longest?
Tarz and Tina 39%
Kathryn and John 26%
Kim and Alaska 18%
Blair and Jeff 17%