Melissa Gorga – How I went from an Independent Woman to Submissive in Five Years and RHOM Let’s Chat

Melissa Gorga – How I went from an Independent Woman to Submissive in Five Years by NMD

On Sunday, I reviewed Melissa Gorga’s book – “Love, Italian Style: The Secrets of my Hot Italian Marriage,” or as I like to call it, “Fifty Shades of Gorga.”  In Melissa’s disturbing tale of obsession, jealous, and marriage, she documents how she went from a young, independent, college student to a submissive wife.  Melissa admits it was a tough journey – and it took her five years to fully assimilate into the Gorg.  {That one is for you, my trekkie loving friend.}  The price of her freedom was riches beyond her imagination – AKA a 10,000 square foot home, and ability to ‘drop’ $10,000 in a monthly spending spree without having Joey ‘Gorga cut up her credit cards.

Here are some of her thoughtful tips – in case you were wondering how you could have the same luck.

1. Treat your husband like a King.  If he tells you to cook and clean – do it.  If he tells you to dress up and wait by the door until he comes – do it.  Don’t question it – because he’ll get mad.  Just do what he says and everything will be great.

2. Sex on demand.  Give in.  If you put up a fight he’ll just take you anyway.  Make it easy on yourself; you can put up with anything for 10 minutes.

3. Initiate sex.  Men will cheat if you don’t give initiate sex, keep in shape, and dress up for them. It is all your fault if your husband cheats.   I’ll repeat that.  It’s all your fault if your husband cheats.  Never let him out of your sight, and make sure he gets sex all the time so that he’s too worn out to cheat.  That’s the only way to hold onto your man.

4. If you have to leave the house, be home before he gets home.  You may need to leave the house to take the kids places, find a place to poop, or get your nails done.  Just make sure you’re home and waiting for him when he gets home.  Preferably in sexy clothes with the kids all fresh and clean, the house sparking, and a drink in your hand.  Do not even think about getting a dog to wait anxiously at the door until he gets home.  That’s your job.

5.  Never, ever compare him to your friends’ men – especially if they help out around the house.  You can’t have everything.  Chances are men who help out around the house are awful husbands in other ways.  I’m not sure how – but that’s what Joey’s told me.

joegorga6. Listen to him when he tells you your fat, or that you look awful in that outfit.  Truth is the key to a healthy relationship.  It may hurt to hear those words, but it’s for your own good.  Just listen to him and change all the things that are awful about you.

7. Never be who you are when you can pretend to be someone better.  Remember, how you appear to people is what’s important, not who you are on the inside.  If you shave your legs, slap on makeup, and put on pretty clothes, he’ll forget that you were living with your boyfriend when you first met him and have a slutty past, and start to think you’re his Queen.  Never let them see you sweat – but try to keep track of your lies.  Notecards help.

There you go.  I hope you take Melissa’s tips to heart.  If you do, you might be able to snag your own Joe Gorga.  Girls can wish 🙂

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Plus Miami is on so Let’s Chat!

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Tuesday Update – Happy Birthday TrashyT

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About Veena (NMD)

Just a housewife ... who loves this place .... and loves to write ... You can reach me through this email: nomoredrama8@gmail.com. Lynn's Place is in tribute to Housewives blogger Lynn Hudson, who passed away in August of 2012.
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268 Responses to Melissa Gorga – How I went from an Independent Woman to Submissive in Five Years and RHOM Let’s Chat

  1. Birdwoman says:

    Wow, my hubby is so not the man Melissa Gorga would like! hahahahaha

  2. Vegas Chick says:

    LOL, NMD. Poor thing is now going to have to write another Bravo blog to explain what she really, really meant. Keep her on her toes or knees. She’s good at begging. #50ShadesofGorga You should probably write it. It will definitely outsell Love Gorga-Style. 🙂

  3. Jill...no not THAT Jill says:

    This maybe too much sharing but if my husband wants to have sex and I don’t I really have no problem saying so-sometimes the mood is just not there. If he decided to sulk around and pout about it I think I would find it kind of amusing-I don’t put up with my kids pouting but I’m supposed to put up with it from a 46 year old man? Come on now-I’m married for 16 years and I have don’t have sex to keep the peace-I have b/c I want to be with my husband-if I’m not in the mood then I say so-it’s not the end of the world and we never had a fight about it. I think Melissa is dumb and Joe is a lazy bastard who won’t wash a dish-I would never sleep with a man who doesn’t do dishes!!

    • Nancy says:

      Ditto!!! I would never stay married if I thought my husband was fooling around as it
      never enters my mind. She is so insecure.

      • Jill...no not THAT Jill says:

        Oh and that too-I’m not about to start acting like a puttana to make sure my husband doesn’t cheat-if a man doesn’t want to be “kept” there ain’t no keepin’ that fool!!!

        • Nancy says:

          Exactly. George knows where the door is.

        • Cartwheels says:

          Ditto, if I need to become a putana to keep him, he just might well get packing.
          I feel sorry for Melissa, she hasn’t worked one honest day of hard labor in her life, so she is probably scared shitless that she will go broke and will have to go to work in the real world.

          I am not degrading myself or accepting to do treesomes just because a bastard SOB can’t keep it in his pants, I do hope that Melissa is just kidding and not passing these values to her poor daughter.

          • melthehound says:

            passing these values to her poor daughter.
            ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
            I think that’s exactly what she is doing… Kiddie see, kiddie do.. Perhaps not at 7 but definitely 17.

            Contrast, Remember Milania’s answer to her mother about who will cook? “No, he’s going to cook for me… “

            • tulsateacher says:

              Right Mel! I want my daughter to be strong and independent. Melissa has already said that she’s going to give this book to Antonia on her wedding day? Oh lord, why? I like Milania’s attitude; let the man cook for HER! In Melissa’s blog, in trying to defend this mess of a book, she says that they (Jezebel) didn’t include Joe’s entire thought on what to do when your “woman” isn’t in the mood. He says that a three minute massage will do the trick, but not for the woman, for HIM! Excuse me? She also says that while Joe doesn’t change diapers he will “play” with the kids for “hours”. Now that’s helpful! My husband knows that he has a better chance of getting lucky if he cleans a dish, not by sitting on his butt and playing XBox with our daughter. I’m secure enough in my relationship that I’m not afraid to tell my husband “no”. I know he won’t leave me or cheat on me if I don’t feel like having sex or I don’t have dinner waiting for him. Couples in secure relationships feel confident enough to do this.

            • rabblerouser2010R says:

              You know for all the flack Joe Guidice gets for calling T the C-word (and yes, it was awful) and thinking that ballroom dancing is ‘gay’.

              He certainly isn’t afraid to take some food out of the fridge and cook it for himself and whoever is around.

    • plainviewsue says:

      Exactly Jill. Melissa is delusional. She may have the big house and an unlimited spending allowance. But I’ll take my husband, my sons, and my sanity over that any day of the week! It sounds like she lives on eggshells. What a horrible life.

      • Amalfi says:

        I think she has got it pretty good and wears the pants in that house, no matter what her book of lies/bible says.

        Her best talent is manipulating dumb Joe into thinking he is the boss. Slimey way to conduct a marriage.

    • rabblerouser2010R says:

      My DH and I have never fought about it either.

  4. Birdwoman says:

    I am always surprised how many people still blame the person getting cheated on instead of the cheater. I have heard several women state that if so and so had sex with her husband more, or lost that baby weight or looked sexy for him all the time that he would never have cheated.
    I always try and point out someone who is extremely attractive and their husband still cheated. So, cheaters cheat because they can and chose too. It is not always about the other person only.

  5. VV says:

    I’m not as kind as NMD. I think MG book should be titled “Filthy Shades of Gorga, Love Neanderthal Style.

  6. Orson says:

    RE: the comments on last blog about the WWHL appearance, I’m not all that concerned about Gia finding out how ignorant her parents are from her friends. I think she’s at the age where she’s already beginning to realize how little they know.

    • Cartwheels says:

      Maybe that is why she seems to speak to them with certain contempt.
      I do feel for Gia, more than the others, she is at that age where the reality of what her parents have done is going to clash with her own hormonal changes, I hope that she comes out of this stronger and aware of the fact that if you chose the behavior then you chose the consequence.

    • chismosa says:

      Imagine what she felt about last season and the vineyards scene- speaking of putanas (sp?) …… Despite the bravo splice and dice

      • kit9 says:

        That’s exactly what I was thinking..I think after hearing her mother say she wanted to stick a finger up her father’s a** and seeing her father’s horny grunting to his girlfriend, that financial issues barely rank on the embarrassment scale for poor Gia.

  7. BB says:

    Wow. What a great life Melissa has! She’s so lucky! She has financial security and all she has to do is: give in to her husband’s sexual demands so he won’t get angry; all the housework and raising of the children; stay with her husband during events and parties; make sure she’s home when her husband gets home; make sure she doesn’t “poop” in his vicinity; make sure her hair, make-up and body are perfect at all times. I’m sure I’ve forgotten something. Financial security must be pretty important to Melissa for her to have to pay that price for it.

  8. Rebecca says:

    That’s all so absurd, I’m questioning whether you made that up.

    She’s not italian. NO Italian woman would think that shitty advice was worth listening too. Melissa is a total slut pig.

  9. Overit says:

    How stinking insensitive and just downright wrong to say its the woman’s fault if a man cheats. I want her to say that to Caroline’s manzos face, Hillary Clinton, Elin Nordegren, Brandi Glanville,……..Hell DOZENS of good wives and mothers I personally know that have shady husbands who mess around!!! Men cheat because of their egos and insecurities. Men who cheat will do it regardless of who their partner is/how hard they follow “Melissa 101 Rules”. Very very insulting and ignorant of her.

    • melthehound says:

      Desire and opportunity.. Same reason Women cheat..

      • Overit says:

        Respectfully disagree MTH….I’ve had rough spots in my marriage and desire and opportunity have been there. However, for some like me, there’s a switch that stops things from crossing the line. I repect myself and family too much and realize that cheating is NEVER the answer…just short term self satisfaction at the expense of others…with usually horrific long term consequences…

    • chismosa says:

      Right but when those women choose to stay with a cheating man or chose someone who they know cheated before (how you get them is how you lose them mentality….)—- I don’t know how I feel about those women

      • Overit says:

        I do agree there. I just know a few heartbreaking situations of marriages 20-25 years that end because of infidelity of the mans end and the wives are beautiful sweet Godly women…just makes me defensive of women like that who may hear “it’s their fault” according to Melissa Gorga….sad….

        • chismosa says:

          Definitely. I don’t think any women really putting much belief into the teachings of Mel or of any HW – has all her marbles 🔘🔘🔘. Even at young ages like you mentioned. They should know from how they are raised how to properly go about choosing a mate.

    • lulu says:

      She wrote it to stick it to Caroline. She’s too stupid to realize that even though she has a ring. She is still a “kept” women who her rapist husband will trade in for any hot young thing. There are dozens of women just like her waiting in line for the big pay day and like her will do anything to get it.

      I always wondered why she always comes off as fake on the show. It makes sense if you have to pretend to be someone else to your own husband. Wouldn’t one want your husband to love u the real you??? Its sick and fd up on so many levels.

    • kit9 says:

      This is obviously about their culture, be it Italians or Jersey or Jersey Italians…the idea that it’s up to the woman to keep her man sexually happy and sex as an answer to everything. Look at last season…Teresa clearly suspected Juicy was talking to his gf and what did she do? Rip him a new one about how horribly he was treating her? Tell him to FO? No, she attempted to mount him on the spot and hump him like a dog in heat. He clearly wasn’t into her but her first instinct was to satisfy him sexually.

      • Rebecca says:

        This has NOTHING to do with being Italian. It has to do with having low self esteem.

        • kit9 says:

          Whatever it is, it’s part of their culture.From the very first season, my jaw dropped at their, to me, antiquated views of women and men and gender roles. I remember watching a scene where all the women were in the kitchen cooking and all the men sitting waiting to be fed and being completely creeped out. And I recall one of the women said how happy she was to wait on the men hand and foot, something like that.

      • chismosa says:

        Exactly Kit! She needed to stand her ground of her man.
        In public. Or at least where cameras were nearby.

        Stay strong Tre!

  10. VV says:

    Why are people saying that Juicy and Teresa were having sex in the bathroom in Punta Cana? It was Meho and Joey Gorga and the infantile Manzo kids and Gregy were watching from a window. How do things get twisted on Twitter like this on blogs and Twitter?! Pay attention people!

    • melthehound says:

      That is the way I remember it too…

    • Nancy says:

      Who is saying that VV?

      • VV says:

        Some idiot on Twitter is saying that Tre and Juicy were having sex in the bathroom. I misread the thread. Not in PC but after Juicy and Joey fight. To me that was a “planed scene” that Mel criticized on her blog. I doubt Tre and Juicy were having sex when cameras were rolling. Meho and Joey DID HAVE SEX in a public bathroom in a Punta Cana. Ask Greggy, Chris or Albie.

        I need a HW DETOX!!! I really do..

        • tulsateacher says:

          They didn’t have sex in the bathroom but they did in the vineyard last season, the same episode where the infamous “c*#t” comment took place. I thought Teresa looked really desperate by doing that.

          • chismosa says:

            Yup— cameras rolled there.
            Annnnnnnnnnnnd her castmates were there

          • VV says:

            Do we know for sure Tre and Juicy were having sex? Joey and Meho were definitively having sex in the public bathroom one has to look no further than the Manzo kids and Greggy’s reaction after looking in the window.

            • tulsateacher says:

              I’m pretty sure they were VV. I’d suggest you watch it and see what you think but that would just be mean of me. It’s pretty gross!

              • VV says:

                I always thought that Napa trip was so full of scripted edited crap. You are right, I don’t think I want to watch again…

            • TexasTart says:

              We don’t know for fact, but I contend with the clothing they had on and the positioning of bodies from what we saw – it was not possible they had intercourse.

              • VV says:

                Bravo doesn’t let golden footage and audio like that on the cutting floor. Specially, coming from the Giudices whom they despise.

            • melthehound says:

              I highly doubt they actually did it there in the vineyard with cameras rolling. Teresa gave it an apparent try it seems but no copulation.

  11. TexasTart says:

    Welcome to Miami 😀

  12. TexasTart says:

    Alexia will be on WWHL tonight.

  13. Nancy says:

    I HATE when people are late!!!

    • TexasTart says:

      ME TOO!!!!! I hate the perpetually late.

      • Nancy says:

        I’ve dumped people for that.

        • TexasTart says:

          I quit meeting people like that at restaurants, or invite them to parties…but I couldn’t quit my sisters and we used to always be waiting on them. Not as much now. But like arrived to my nephews birthday and my sis was making cake the first two hours. 🙄

          • Jill...no not THAT Jill says:

            Late people are my worst! If you are late to meet me three consecutive times I’m don’t making plans with you. Do late people think their time is more important than everyone else’s? Or they just don’t care? Idk and I don’t care!!!

  14. TexasTart says:

    This is ridiculous that Joanna and Adriana would make up…in real life, I think not.

  15. Nancy says:

    Lipo on his arms???

  16. TexasTart says:

    Do you see those horrible looking spider veins on Lenny’s left arm….ugh he is a mess! Did he also have liposuction on his arms?! Gross.

    • Nancy says:

      Great minds think alike. 🙂

      • TexasTart says:

        Yep, Lisa said he had lipo on his stomach and failed to mention all that mess we could see. That was gross. A man doing lipo, that is new to me.

        • Nancy says:

          He needs to get his clotting time checked. I bet that bruise on his arm was from
          the BP cuff as his hand was bruised as well from the IV. There is no reason
          he should be getting blood all over the sheets from the small incisions from the lipo.

          • tulsateacher says:

            I wondered that too Nancy! For being the “best” plastic surgeon in the US (isn’t that what Lisa always says?) you’d think he’d do a better job of tending to his own wounds.

  17. Nancy says:

    She is so selfish. I can’t stand her.

  18. TexasTart says:

    Did she say she lived in Austin Texas? I’ll play that part again.

  19. TexasTart says:

    Good Advise grandma!

  20. Nancy says:

    She was solo pretty. What a shame.

  21. Nancy says:

    Oh no this should be good. lol

  22. TexasTart says:

    Just you and me Nancy! Everyone else has a NJ hangover 😉 hehe

  23. TexasTart says:

    Cool pics of a young Romain – I didn’t know he was a model.
    That nervous eye twitch thing he has is kind of annoying.

  24. Nancy says:

    This is sad.

  25. Nancy says:

    She should have a live-in esp if she is still drinking.

    • Rebecca says:

      I’d love to spend a month with Elsa. We could all take turns!

      Now that is a prize worth making the first post.

  26. TexasTart says:

    Marisol to Elsa “are you making a face?”
    😆

  27. Nancy says:

    You still there TT?

  28. TexasTart says:

    Hoanna, Hoanna 🙄 what is there to be nervous about? Meeting your husband?! Role playing is okay..just I don’t like her fakeness

    • Nancy says:

      She’s not very sophisticated. I guess it’s a good thing that she is very pretty.

      • TexasTart says:

        Yes. And it would be kind of difficult to tolerate anyone that self absorbed unless they were good to look at……right Romain?!

  29. TexasTart says:

    Are you still here Nancy?!

  30. Nancy says:

    She couldn’t have given it to the Good Will?

  31. TexasTart says:

    I didn’t miss Lea tonight. Points to Marysol for bringing her up only once.

  32. VV says:

    Joe Giudice is completely correct to say the kids wouldn’t want to go with Meho and Joey Marco. The names Joey called Teresa, the hate he displayed for her and total disrespect for Tre and Juicy. The same goes for Mel all the bad mouthing she did about Juicy and Tre in front of he camera PALES in comparison to anything the Giudices ever said about them.
    #melisssisscum #joeyisgarbage

  33. Rebecca says:

    Adriana is not getting married in a Catholic Church?? Isn’t the fact that she did not marry Fredric in a Catholic Church the reason she doesn’t consider them really married?

    Oy vey.

    • chismosa says:

      Rebecca – I talked about this with VV some weeks past – I was not sure if she could even get married in a Catholic Church to begin with since they won’t marry you unless you have an annulment, right ?

      Especially as I thought Fred was Catholic. But we learned that Fred was married before also.
      VV knows more about the church they marry at. I didnt know if Adri was catholic since evangelists and Mormons are a growing thing in the poor areas of Brazil, so I was assuming catholic as well. I think she may have been raised Catholic so color me QUITE surprised her mother and father divorced ! Back then in a Latin country that is quite scandalous. Usually wives just put up with the machismo

      I just can’t wait to see her dress ! Lol

      • VV says:

        I think De Moura is a con artist. Sorry Chismo. I think she will claim to be whatever religion fits her plan at the time.

        • chismosa says:

          No prob VV I get it. I ordered my “in the minority” tshirts and caps …..👴👴😘😘😘

          Ps did you finally watch Beth??? With Martha ??
          🙄
          🙄 >>>>>infinity ➿➿➿➿

        • chismosa says:

          Ps VV I’m definitely dARFinetely going to be in the minority if crowned princess Laurita Dina comes back.

          Have that to look forward to.
          🔫🔫🔫🔪🔪🔪🔪me now

    • T-Rex says:

      How can she get married in the Catholic Church? This is her FOURTH marriage, she would have had to have all of those annulled, it isn’t easy and it isn’t cheap either. In addition, Frederick was also married, and his former wife was Catholic, no way she allows her marriage to be annulled. Hmmmph, are we sure it was a Catholic Church?? Could have been Episcopalian(aka Catholic-Lite). Shoot my husband and I are both on our First marriage and they wouldn’t make an exception at the Pre-cana classes, which we asked to skip so we could get married in the church before his father died. They said NOPE and that is the Florida Diocese. Hmmmmm maybe more FAKE Bravo editing, since she is already married, didn’t need a “true” priest to marry them, just some jobber in a Priest suit would do. Hmmmm

  34. TexasTart says:

    NMD – Thank you for pulling together all you have for NJ. I’m sure it wasn’t fun, but you managed it well. 🙂

  35. boston02127 says:

    Thank you Melissa!
    I no longer have to worry about writing my own wedding vows.
    .
    .
    .
    .
    PUKE

    • Should I send you the book? I’m sure you’ll especially love the bits about dressing to show off your naughty bits and wearing glittery eye shadow.

      • chismosa says:

        NMD I’m sorry to hear you paid for the actual hard copy of the book- why did I think you got it electronically – which is cheaper.

        So sorry you did that for us. …..

        Thanks 💙💛💜💚

  36. Morning everyone. I worked late last night so no blog new blog this morning. PS – Thank you Melissa for the copycat on Fifty Shade in your Bravo Blog. Glad to see you’re reading.

  37. The Bravo Blonde was at the party the night of the fight – and she’s blogged about it. This blogger I trust completely to tell the truth.
    http://tbbreality.wordpress.com/2013/09/30/rhonj-season-5-episode-19-aka-salon-farewell-the-nightmare-before-east-part-2/

    • chismosa says:

      This is exactly what I was asking in my comment – if someone NOT contracted to Bravo can talk.

      Hallelujah 🌁☁⛅🌈🌈🙏🙏🙏🙌🙌

    • chismosa says:

      In trying to open it it’s tough to open. This is not Heather Maclean I hope 👀

    • AZGirl says:

      Crazy stuff. Joey needs to get off steroids.

    • VV says:

      Thank you NMD. I’ve read different accounts but not this one. I found interesting Caroline texting her boys after the mess exploded. You would think she would tail hate out if there and keep them away from chaos. Perhaps, she did it because Chris was involved.

  38. Powell says:

    Good morning everyone. I’m one of the 800,000 hard working men & women that keeps the Federal Govt cranking along & I’m on furlough. My 4 hrs to work is just about up
    so I’ll be on my way home. I know BBs daughter and a few others here have family that may be on the same Titanic ship as I am on. But everyone have a great day. 🙂

    • chismosa says:

      Yikes Powell I’m sorry.
      I don’t get this whole thing, I only get it from the magazines- to quote Teresa – but I’ll pray for you.

      And last night Nightline was about all the Americans going overseas to get operations.
      What a freakin mess we’re in

      • SoutheastVA says:

        Hi Powell. I’m one of the 800,000+ hard working men & women that keeps the Federal Govt cranking along too. I didn’t get furloughed due to my command’s mission and the job I perform in it. But, plenty of my co-workers did. In my “excepted” status, I am basically working for free. We can’t get paid for the hours worked during this period until a budget is in place. Also, can’t take any type of leave. If I get sick and can’t come in to work, I will be placed in furlough status. Seems illegal to me. But what do I know, I only put in 25 years so far.

    • The politicians are playing with people’s lives. They should be ashamed of themselves.

    • LaineyLainey says:

      I’m sorry Powelly-pooh. Praying for you and the 800,000. You, I pray for by name, the other 799,999 I have to lump together. I hope that’s ok. But seriously, it’s good to pray for our nation and our leaders. We sure need it.

    • BB says:

      I’m sorry you are affected Powell. Some of my friends are in the same boat, but luckily so far my daughter and her husband haven’t been furloughed yet. Well, let’s put it this way. They are both working, but who knows if they will get a paycheck for it. It boggles my mind that balancing the budget is one of the few things that Congress is mandated to accomplish and they cannot manage to do even that one thing. A pox on ALL of them in DC. They’ve failed their constituents miserably and should be fired – ALL of them. We would be fired if we didn’t do our jobs – why shouldn’t they?

      • Just Wondering In Jersey says:

        You tell it BB! And, constitution or not they should not get their paychecks either. Who do they think they are anyway.

        Powell I feel for you and all the others affected by this nonsense.

    • AZGirl says:

      So sorry Powell. This is just awful. They all should be fired but at least no paid for the days we are shut down. One senator was on target when he announced on the senate floor that they all need to get away from the tv cameras and come into the chambers and get to work.

    • TexasTart says:

      So sorry your are one of those affected Powell. I hope it will get straightened out soon!!!

    • Lulu says:

      I’m so sorry Powell. I hope this resolves itself and fast.

    • VV says:

      (((Powell)))

  39. HuskerHuny says:

    I’m so sorry for the honest, hard-working people who go to work everyday and all they ask for is an fair wage and a few benefits. Government employees are really getting the short-end of the stick right now while Congress will still get paid and receive their benefits. What’s wrong with this picture?

    Instead of being Democrats or Republicans, how about being Americans who were voted into office to look after the welfare of the citizens of this country. Once again, those of us who go to work each day, will end up paying for all of this while at the same time, getting decreased wages and fewer benefits.

    This has got to stop. I will be voting in new congress and senators from my state. Change starts with us voters. Who’s with me?

    Sorry to hear about your situation Powell. Hope all of this is over soon for you and others like you.

    • Laineylainey says:

      Hi HH! Time for a change, momma!

    • Rebecca says:

      The majority of congressmen and senators are lawyers. Why can’t we vote in more educators, hospital administrators, social workers, etc? No offense to our legal employees here, but I don’t want a plumber making decisions on my teeth – so let’s vote the proper people in this time!!

  40. Mene Seela says:

    I’ve been wondering how the employees at the Gorgas local Burger King feel about MeGos book.
    I mean didn’t she state that she runs over there to deposit her unsexy #2s in their potty?

  41. Powell says:

    Thank you everyone for your words. I hope and pray that this furlough will end soon, like no later than Friday. It’s so ridiculous. They ALL need to be fired. I’m sick of them. I want real honest politicians who wake up every morning and say to themselves “what can I do for the American people today? What can I do to make the USA prosperous, thrive and grow?” Sigh….

    • cusi77 says:

      I wish this furlough will end soon as well and keep praying with you and for you and the other 799,000 people in the same place you are! Please, count on me for anything you need, ask NMD for my email address dear!

    • designernailsdiana says:

      Powell they usually start out that way and then the lobbyists get into their ears and wallets. Money seems to be the motivation for 90% of the politicians. Some do very well, but a lot of them play games. Didn’t we all learn the art of COMPROMISE in elementary school? I know I did. I think Washington needs a reminder class. No pay unless you all play nicely!

      • Rebecca says:

        I believe some of them start off with the best of intentions and then the lobbyists get a hold of them. It’s sad.

        • melthehound says:

          Except for his/her own interest, I don’t believe any politician has best intentions to begin with. Want a different result? Start firing politicians at the polls instead of re-electing them. Eventually, those horse’s peckers will get the point.

    • KTinCT says:

      ((((Powell))))

  42. baronessbeachcomber says:

    Happy Birthday, Trashy T! What does the T stand for? Tamra? Television?

  43. Powell says:

    Happy Birthday Trashy T.

  44. Powell says:

    Just saw an ATL promo commercial and I see Porscha is back next season. So how much will we see about her & Cordell’s split do you think? I am so sorry that she miscarried once during their marriage but I hope she breathed a sigh of relief that they didn’t have any kids. She no longer ever has to see him or deal w/him.

    • Laineylainey says:

      Her thing was being the wife of Cordell…she just has to be more interesting now that Cordell is out of the picture.

    • chismosa says:

      Her hair looks SO much better this season.
      I still hope Sashay Shantay …..and twirl twirl ….. Takes her down. Porscha annoys me
      Boy she’s lucky she got herself a storyline …..

  45. shamrockblonde says:

    I wonders sometimes , if the reason that Mel wrote that book in the first place is from a love for her Father – I saw clips of her speaking about him and it seemed to me that she missed him very much and I wonder if she somehow blames her Mother for his cheating – that maybe this book is a subtle way of saying that had her Mom tried harder, he would not have strayed and maybe not have been killed in that accident – because if she truly believes all of that drivel, then her daughter is in for a very rough growing up –

    as for sex on demand – I work full time days – Mr. Shamrock works full time nights – we have to schedule fights, let alone sex – and when he comes in at 2 in the morning he checks on the twins to this day, pulling their covers up and kissing them on the head as they sleep before he comes into our room and if I’m asleep, he does not wake me up – he simply gets into bed and puts his arm around me, and I wake up enough to tell him I love him and he tells me he loves me and we fall asleep together – remember too that the twins are right across the hall and my daughter is down the hall – he also does the dishes, vacums and does the laundry, he’s changed his fair share of diapers, fed multiple babies and even changed the sheets when one of twins was constantly wetting her bed – all without complaint, and for that I find him dead sexy – he looks a bit like Harrison Ford so that helps too……

    I just wonder sometimes if somewhere in her she blames her Mom for her Dad leaving – I just don’t get how she can truly believe that those “tips” are even real, let alone helpful – it’s sad – and that is something I have never felt for her –

    • cusi77 says:

      Amazing post Shamrock! You have a good head over your shoulders and a good heart!

    • Powell says:

      Shamrock I was thinking about it and I think she blames her mother for her father cheating. Her “rules” are like she’s throwing in her mother’s face that if she’d only done a to z her father wouldn’t have strayed. Thats got to be a knife in her mothers heart.

  46. AZGirl says:

    Happy Birthday Trashy T!

  47. mrs peabody says:

    I watched the finale of NJ last night. You know even after Teresa apologized to her brother for being around people who said negative things about his wife I didn’t hear him say he was sorry for all the horrible things he said on TV about her. I still don’t think she owes him or anyone an apology. I think all of them owe her one for all the badmouthing they did of her and her husband. Yes I understand she feels bad for being around people who were badmouthing her SIL but I don’t see where she did anything any different than joey and his wife, Kathy and her husband did, they were around wacky and her family and clown woman and her family when they were badmouthing Teresa. They have the same relationship with those people as teresa has with the ones she was around in fact even more of one since they are also co-workers. I think what they did was worse as they did it on TV, for the most part we did not see her doing that, but almost every scene with them they were doing it. As far as Teresa doing whatever she has to to have her brother in her life, she’s wasting her time, she’s always going to be doing something they don’t like and most of that is because they are so jealous of her. He is a little crybaby who really needs to grow up. I was glad to hear Joe say they kids would not go with them if they had to go to jail. I agree with what he said about the kids’ not wanting to go with them after all they’ve said about their mom on tv as far as Gia is concerned, I doubt she would ever want to go with her aunt. The others are really to little to understand all that went on. I would hope he would not even consider it, I would never want my kids around that mess of a family. As far as that book goes, what an idiot, did she really think that crap was going to be well received. Yea she did. What I don’t understand was why someone would even consider publishing it. Unless of course the publisher was team Teresa and wanted to embarrass Melissa good time. Smart publisher, guess there is someone out there who was willing to show the true Melissa. I gotta wonder though what Caroline thinks of Melissa’s thinking about it being the woman’s fault when the man cheats. I guess Caroline must have pooped when Al was around. I guess it’s Caroline’s fault if it’s true Al is cheating. Wonder if her kids blame her for their dad having a girlfriend.

    • melthehound says:

      I doubt the publisher read that mess and I further doubt that any publisher would waste money publishing a book just to embarrass a Bravo Housewife. It’s a funny notion and one I fully support but I don’t think that’s the way it happened. Agree with everything else you wrote though 🙂

      • Overit says:

        Totally OT- but I watched “Bethany” for the first time yesterday and it was so odd and uncomfortable to see her being so nice/bubbly/huggy with people! So different from seeing her on bravo shows… I actually was cringing! Awkward!

      • mrs peabody says:

        I don’t either really, but it sounded good!

    • VV says:

      Well stated! 👌👍👏

    • Mene Seela says:

      Ms Peabody … Caroline pooped so Al cheated. Perfect.

  48. designernailsdiana says:

    Before I met my Soulmate and found true wedded bliss I dated. I was online and let me tell you I had many and I mean MANY married men chatting with me. I found that most of them felt their wives didn’t want sex. I’m nosey and since they messaged me I asked tough questions. How do you approach her to initiate sex? Usually it was kissing passionately while she was COOKING (Hello idiot that can be dangerous, women and hot burners!). Or they’d reach over in bed and try to grab her chest. I explained that men are like a microwave and heat up instantly, while women are crock pots set on low and we need to simmer all day to get ready for the night time activities whatever they are. (I read 50 shades of beige, where’s my flogger?) (Ha ha I bet some of your mouths just dropped open, GOTCHA!!!) I think a lot of men, not all, forget the art of seduction. Women, not all, like to be wined and dined like when we first started dating. We want to see some real effort put forth to earn some of our attention. Without being asked or prodded washing dishes or clothes. Doing those types of cleaning or chores are a HUGE turn on for most women. Nothing sexier than a man elbow deep in dish washing soap scrubbing those greasy pots and pans. The sound of a vacuum running in another room will cause me to run and see who’s playing a joke on me. If I see my hubby vacuuming I just about melt.
    My point is it’s all in the actions taken before the guy wants the cookie that will get him the cookie. (Cookie = Nookie). TMI??
    I hope you got a chuckle from my dating after 40 story.
    P.S. I did date men that were not married I just ended up being very good at married male detecting. They put off a certain vibe. Not unlike a repellant that this Blonde could smell 20 miles away!
    Is it Friday yet?

    • Powell says:

      Diana. The Married Man Detector. 🙂

    • lulu says:

      ;). I’m under the impression that in regards to sex. Melissa aka whoreseyface believes its all about the ehem two parts joining and that’s where it ends. Not the foreplay or enticement that happens beforehand. But I suppose if I only allowed my dh to have sex with me for ten minutes it would be boring. I bet she sets her egg timer and kicks slowjoe off of her when the buzzer goes off. The women is repulsed by him and who wouldn’t be. Especially if your looked at to be raped if you don’t comply. Its gross and sick. She should have named the book “the things I have to do to be a kept woman.”.

    • Mene Seela says:

      Love this post.

    • T-Rex says:

      When I too was single, long before I met my Mr T-Rex, I worked in a bar as a bartender. You could tell who the married guys were very easily! They would hit on either myself, or one of our waitresses with the “woe is me”, my wifey doesn’t understand, doesn’t give me sex on demand, yadda yadda. However we also had the married women that would want to bang the cute bartenders, they were more honest about it, they wanted an adventure. I have been with Mr. T-Rex, monogamously for 24 years, are we as amorous as we once were, no, but are we best friends that like to be with each other all the time and don’t need that adrenaline rush of cheating. I have noted that folks that cheat are unhappy with themselves, and in most cases probably got married for all the “wrong” reasons. I had a friend who gave her husband “sex on demand”, did all the stuff that he wanted, and what did he still want, he wanted some “strange”(this is what we called it). Again it’s because a lot of folks marry Mr/Miss RIGHT NOW instead of who is best suited for them. I think MeWHORES hole book sets women back to the stone ages, I didn’t read that FiftyShadesofShite book either, I don’t care about some racy Harlequin romance novel, because I heard the writing was just as bad as those books. When MeWHORA is twenty years older, and some young ass tail throws her ass in JoWHORA’s face he will cheat if he truly only stays with his woman because she is his slave!

      • Laineylainey says:

        A little off topic but do you remember when KKB tried to talk about looking for Mr. Right vs. Mr. RIGHT NOW. She fumbled it up and it made for a really funny scene with Jillz and LuAnn giving her the side-eye and looking at each other as if to say, do you know what she’s talking about?

        Back to the topic, I’ll bet you learned a lot about human beings while you were bartending. Oh and…Did you mean to refer to Mel’s book as her “hole” book?

    • Laineylainey says:

      I love this post!! It’s so REAL (bravo has ruined that word for me). But you speak the truth, Dnd. You know what else makes me feel affectionate ? when my hubby does great dad things. When he’s loving and attentive toward our kids. That really really really melts my heart.

    • lulu says:

      Dnd really curious what gave away that they are married??? Years ago I worked overnight in a hotel at the front desk. Nothing like the walk of shame with yeah that is not your wife. Its painfully obvious. Could tell the professionals from the mistress.

      • designernailsdiana says:

        Most times it had to do with the things that they omitted telling me. Some of the guys were kind of deceptive but I would be straight up and ask are you married or have kids.? I’d wait to see what he said or how long it took him to answer. I had one really bad date with a guy who met me at the mall we were going to go have dinner while we’re talking his wife walked in. I ended up paying for my dinner needless to say it was a very awkward meal he just sat and watched me eat he didn’t eat. After he got divorced he contacted me. I felt he owed me a meal so I made him take me to a really expensive seafood place and then I never saw him again. Payback is a bitch!
        Oh man, the stories I could tell.

        • Lulu says:

          Yikes!!! DND!!! Next blog should be of your stories!!!! 🙂

          I can’t forget this I think because of the shame……. One man on the weekends an older guy used to stay at the hotel. Really nice guy but for the record that was not his daughter or wife he brought in……………… You could tell the call girls from the one’s he picked up at a bar. To each their own I guess. Whenever he would bring in a girl if one of us spotted him which we ALWAYS did. His face would turn bright red and he would look down.

  49. VV says:

    Just what we needed another HE with recipes.

    @BrandiGlanville: My website is up and kind of running, check it out! It’s at http://t.co/DB7DQAunyZ. Woohoo! I’m trying to post a favorite recipe! 🙂

    Original Message:

  50. KTinCT says:

    Happy Birthday, TrashyT 🙂

    • Laineylainey says:

      Hi sweet KT!!! How is your family? I hope all is well. How old is she now? 5? 💕💕💓

      • KTinCT says:

        Hey, LaineyLainey! All is well, Maggie turned 4 on August 1st and now goes to preschool 3 times a week 🙂 Hope all is well with you and yours! xo

  51. Nancy says:

    HOCKEY STARTS TONIGHT!!!!!!! 🙂 Go LA Kings!!!!

    Happy Birthday TrashyT.

    • Laineylainey says:

      Oh Nancy’s gone go crazy again…hockey’s back!!

      • Nancy says:

        Hi Lainey…I’m Canadian so I didn’t have a choice. lol

        I feel so bad for my bff’s husband. He works for the FBI so now he doesn’t have
        his pay check as well as Barbs. They just bought a very nice new house before she
        passed away. Oh dear…

    • melthehound says:

      Nancy, it may or may not interest you to know that one of the amazing race teams this time around are Ice Girls for the LA Kings. I don’t know what their real job is other than to look pretty pushing ice scrapers around but, point of interest.

  52. chismosa says:

    VV liar 👖👖👖🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥is saying Jacq needs to be fired before Dina downer comes back.
    They’re planting the seeds ……no matter how unreliable the sources .. Testing the waters 🛀🚿🏊🏊……. She’s back I can feel it.
    Plus I think Jacq was one of the 1st they did the “update” on the finale …. I think those first ones were the ones in jeopardy of not returning.

    Vomit 🙄
    :puke:

    • VV says:

      Chianina, I think there might be some truth to those rumors because she didn’t deny them. Here’s her Twitter statement:
      Ok, let me put all the rumors to rest right now so I can continue my love affair with twitter…
      I have NOT made any decisions on my next career move yet, I haven’t gotten anyone fired nor do I have the power to do that~Don’t be so silly
      ..now can we go back to talking about important stuff like cats & facials? ; )

  53. VV says:

    According to Penelope who has another blog out when JTG said “ask your sister” this is how it played out in real life: “Then Dum Dum started saying that I was a stalker that just showed up to parties. When my lovie told him I was invited and Dum Dum asked by who, my lovie told him to ask his sister.” Once again, those Bravo editors are ready to cue any accusatory words towards Teresa to make her look like the bad guy.

  54. Nancy says:

    Mel…I think I’m going to take a pass. 🙂

  55. VV says:

    @Teresa_Giudice: @Sunshine1335 Yes! Love him! Dedicated all my books to him & told the story of he and my ma in Fabulicious. http://t.co/1DTrISPLLT

    Original Message:

  56. Trashy T says:

    Thank you all for the birthday wishes. Had a wonderful birthday with good friends visiting from Tucson, capped off with a delicious al fresco dinner… One of those nights that makes living in Las Vegas a good thing! Now I have to go read the blog… Thanks again!

    • chismosa says:

      Love Vegas ! Glad you had a nice birthday and hope you didn’t get too “trashed”
      Heehee

  57. TexasTart says:

    Cool. Glad to hear you had a good one!

  58. TexasTart says:

    • VV says:

      In my best Ken (Kim’s ex boyfriend) impersonation: We don’t care!

      In Brandi’s own words, her cast mates friendships are superficial.

      What powers does Kyle Richards posses that after she insults CamilleGrammer they become BBF. Next, she insults Brandi and now are acting like BFF. For some odd reason Lisa likes Kyle, WTH?!

      • TexasTart says:

        Right. The “we don’t care” made me LOL!

      • chismosa says:

        VV -heavy Bravo lineup on Beth’s show today- Kathy (????) from nj and Jenny Pulos

        Also you may be interested to know I believe Beth’s attorney will be on katie Couric today

        🙄 infinity ➿➿➿➿

  59. ladebra says:

    Morning Glories! Hope you are doing ok Powell, and this madness will be over very soon.

  60. ladebra says:

    Mike, Mike, Mike …. What day is it?

  61. Jill...no not THAT Jill says:

    And this one wonders why she can’t find a man-is she for real??

    @BrandiGlanville: so the guy I thought could possibly B amazing is beyond doosch-baggy.Ive been so good 4 so long! F*ck u! Such a Loser! #insertinitials

    I changed the F word for her!!

    • chismosa says:

      Hey Ashy- how are you ?

      I was kind of surprised last night on watch what happens – that they didnt blur out the middle fingers that Andy made ? I thought giving the middle finger on non-cable or the “extra” racy general channels was a no-no

      You and your BBB
      So funny 📲📲📲📲🚬🚬🚬🍷🍷🍷🍷

  62. TexasTart says:

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