I Dream of NeNe by NMD
For some reason I thought NeNe’s wedding was a three episode series like Tamra Barney’s. We’re into episode four, and the wedding is five weeks away. I only watched the last twenty minutes of last week’s episode, but it was non-stop fighting between the bridesmaids. I suppose NeNe knew that Diana and Marlo would bring the drama. NeNe pretends she doesn’t like it, but she really doesn’t seem bothered that these ladies (and I use that world loosely) are fighting over her. Moving on.
This week’s episode opens with NeNe trying to resolve the fight. They lost me when one of them stuck their tongue out at another one. What’s with the elementary school behavior? I suppose they are looking for screen time.
Next up is NeNe having lunch with Porsha Steward. Porsha referred Tiffany the wedding planner, and NeNe is pretty upset that she listened to the dingbat. Tiffany is the wedding planner that ended up suing NeNe. I don’t know if that was for real or drama. NeNe likes to say she keeps it real, but she has to make the show interesting so it’s hard to say what is going on. She keeps up the story line of not liking this wedding planner much, by trying to phone her over and over again. She tells us that Tiffany isn’t returning her calls. It sure seems like a good wedding planner would return her client’s calls – because brides typically are a little uptight.
Since NeNe can’t get hold of her wedding planner, she takes Marlo with her to pick out invitations. Apparently Marlo’s fashion sense translates to invitations. NeNe is really put out that she has to pick her own invitations – apparently a wedding planner does that for you. Marlo wants NeNe to pick out an invitation that no one will throw out – with some bling. NeNe rightly points out that people will keep them for a little while then throw them out.
Next scene is Gregg visiting Peter Thomas at BarOne – Peter’s bar. Gregg (again) explains that the divorce was all his fault. He admits to being unemployed and living off NeNe. Then Peter brings up the pre-nup, and says he should sign it. Gregg seems against it in principle. Of course he is – that’s a main storyline.
Finally NeNe gets a sit-down with the wedding planner. Tiffany is late because her plane sat on the tarmac for 2 hours. Tiffany starts off asking NeNe if she got the sketches. She didn’t. Neither did Gregg. Tiffany says she’ll print out the designs and have NeNe approve them so that they can move forward. NeNe is so done with her, and snaps back – Tiffany snaps back, and asks “why the hell did you hire me?” NeNe then tells her that the first two wedding planners were booked. All the time Tiffany is chewing like a cow on a wad of gum, so when NeNe tells her she needs a professional wedding planner, I sort of agree with NeNe. Hello – ask for confirmation that your email reached the client if it has a big attachement!! They bicker back and forth. Tiffany leaves – and I’m not sure if NeNe fired her or not.
Next scene is Gregg on the phone with Peter saying he wants to cancel the wedding and get married at a justice of the peace. The wedding is three weeks away – and it seems like NeNe did fire Tiffany. Peter advises him to tread carefully because NeNe has her heart set on a big wedding.
Gregg and NeNe discuss the wedding planner situation, and again I’m not sure if Tiffany is fired. NeNe tells us that she hasn’t heard from her since their big fight – and that is completely unprofessional. Maybe she quit? Gregg is really worried about switching wedding planners – but NeNe is worried that Tiffany won’t pull it off. Gregg finally admits that he’s worried that NeNe will get so stressed she’ll make him live in the basement again. So he begs her to cancel the wedding and move on with the marriage. Of course, NeNe wants her wedding so she overrules him and decides to hire a new wedding planner.
Now it’s a meeting with the bridesmaids again, and Cynthia is there with a basic of shade protection sun glasses. That woman sure has some strange ideas. After getting them to stop bickering, NeNe explains that she didn’t fire Tiffany, but she hasn’t heard from her. Cynthia has hooked her up with her wedding planner – Tony – to get things back on track. (Hmmm – she probably should have fired Tiffany officially.)
NeNe hits it off immediately with Tony. He’s got a room all set up for her and she loves it. She’s brought Marlo along to help for some reason – and tells her she can be her creative director. Tony asks about budget, and NeNe says between a half million and a million. That’s a whole lotta money!
Now back to the pre-nup. NeNe asks for one, and Gregg fires back – “did I miss an opportunity? 17 years ago should I have asked for a pre-nup?” That doesn’t work for him, so he acts hurt. NeNe babies him a bit, then tells him – pre-nup or no wedding. She seems determined to make him apologize endlessly and grovel – but he seems willing to do it. Whatever works for them I guess.
RHoM – S3Ep09
In this episode (according to my TV guide): Adriana will botox Frederic & make unreasonable demands on her guests (wasn’t she already doing that?), Marysol & Alexia will attempt to make her more reasonable, Romain & Joanna continue to have sex problems (I’m so over this storyline), & Marysol finally confronts Lea about Elsa’s illness (instead of just whining about Lea’s absence to everyone else). I don’t think that I’m the only one who finds this season to be a tad boring. The storylines are dragging out far too long without any real conflict.
This week we begin with Joanna & Romain at their Miami house. Joanna is eating sushi & waiting on Lisa. As she shuts the fridge, Romain notices a calendar that Joanna has marked with “sex,” “lovemaking,” and “find the hole” on every day as opposed to the weekly schedule, suggested by the therapist. Joanna says that Romain isn’t taking the therapy seriously & that they need to work out their issues before the wedding. Lisa arrives & sees the calendar. She notices that Joanna has listed only one BJ. Romain seems very excited about the idea, but Joanna quickly shuts him down because she just isn’t interested in that. As tired as I am of this storyline, I’m even more tired of Joanna expecting Romain to do all of the compromising. She seems very concerned with whether she is satisfied, but not at all concerned with Romain’s needs.
The ladies sit down to lunch & the talk turns to LA. Lisa tells Joanna that she was glad to see Joanna really open up on the trip. Joanna asks Lisa to be a bridesmaid. Of course, Lisa accepts. She’s worried about how Adriana will react. The talk turns back to sex. Lisa decides, hopefully jokingly, that she will be Joanna & Romain’s therapist. At this point, the women have finished several bottles of wine & are getting silly. They demonstrate what should happen when Romain walks through the door at night. Romain, in his TH, says that he’s tired of Joanna talking about sex all of the time. So am I!
On to Alexia, who is at Venue magazine on her birthday. One of her housekeepers didn’t show & the other got a flat tire. Rich people problems. Marysol arrives with a gift. The two discuss Adriana’s wedding invitation, which was an Evite! Seriously? While there is nothing wrong with an Evite, I can’t imagine having a “classy” & huge wedding event like Adriana says she’s planning, and not sending a formal, paper invite. Her wedding planner needs to be fired ASAP! Actually, why isn’t Marysol planning the wedding if the ladies are such great friends? The invitation contains a second page, which outlines the required attire and reasons therefore. It specifies that the wedding attire is white, which is the color of “angels and gods,” reflecting all that is “sacred and pure.” She attached a “mood board” of recommended attire. Bridezilla does not even begin to describe Adriana. Again, she’s more concerned with the ambiance & appearance of her wedding than with the actual marriage. Marysol finds the required costume change ridiculous. So do I. Alexia & Marysol decide that they need to discuss the absurdity with Adriana. “Friends don’t let friends torture other friends.”
Lea arrives at Lisa’s with the Birkin they picked out in LA. Hermes wanted Lisa to have it; Lea didn’t even have to lie to get it for her. The bag is a really pretty robin’s egg blue, costing approximately $10,000. Lea explains to Lisa how to hide the Birkin from Lenny for a little while so he doesn’t realize that he paid for it. Oh dear! Do they really think that Lenny won’t notice the charge? And who spends that much on a bag?!?! That’s a car or a down payment on a house!
Lauren Foster takes Marysol & Adriana for vitamin IV fusions before the wedding. The women choose which IV treatment they want from a menu of things like skin, nails, CEO, etc. I was pleased to see that a physician administered the IV, but I’m hoping they took some kind of medical history to be sure the women wouldn’t react to any of the vitamins. Marysol was the most squeamish about the IV, and I don’t blame her. Why get an IV when it’s not medically necessary? They have some wine while they’re receiving their treatments, though Adriana has some kind of green drink. Adriana begins discussing the wedding & Marysol decides to bring up the absurdity of requiring your guests to change clothes for the reception. Adriana refuses to budge. She doesn’t care what her guests think; she only cares about how everyone looks.
Alexia arrives at Lea’s office to pick up her gift. It’s Lea Black beauty products. Really Lea? You couldn’t get your friend a real gift? I think it’s very tacky to use a friend’s birthday to hock your skin care line. Alexia brings up that Lea hasn’t seen or asked about Elsa in the two months since she fell ill. Lea says that is not true. She says that she sent numerous cards and shows a text message that was sent to Marysol. Alexia doesn’t believe Lea, she’s firmly on Team Marysol. As usual, someone is lying. Alexia questions why everyone would be lying about Lea. Good question! While I believe that Lea cares about Elsa & probably did text Marysol, I don’t believe that she reached out as much as she claims. I think that Lea is starting to get caught up in presenting her life as fabulous & losing touch with the real world. Why would Marsyol lie? Why would Marysol’s father not know about the cards or flowers? I wonder what Elsa has to say.
Joanna & Romain return to the therapist. I’m so over hearing Joanna whine about the lack of sex! Romain needs more romance & femininity, but Joanna seems to think that she’s already compromised enough by moving to Miami. Again, she thinks that only Romain should have to compromise now. The therapist encourages them to think more deeply & communicate about their childhood. They each had a trying childhood, but Romain had a very abusive mother while Joanna had her family to rely upon. The therapist points out that Romain is looking for a nurturing figure in his life, but that Joanna is fiercely independent & not very nurturing toward Romain.
Adriana & Frederic are in Lenny’s office for a “touch of botox” to make Frederic perfect. Ugh. There is no stopping Adriana’s quest for the “perfect” wedding appearance. Frederic is pleased with the result. I’m not sure why Adriana has suddenly decided she’s unhappy with Frederic’s appearance.
Alexia’s birthday party! All of the ladies are invited. Adriana has heard that Lisa will be a bridesmaid at Joanna’s wedding. Adriana is suspicious because Joanna has just now invited Lisa & upset that Lisa didn’t tell her. Lisa tries to explain that it just happened & that she planned to tell Adriana. I think Adriana expected Lisa to call her as soon as she was invited to get approval. Who cares if Lisa in both weddings? Adriana & Joanna have (allegedly) moved on, so Adriana shouldn’t have a problem with it. Adriana seems only ok with it, but only because her wedding is first.
Lea arrives & immediately Marysol & Ana gets nasty looks on their faces. Marysol decides to confront Lea, at Alexia’s birthday party. These women just can’t let a party go without a scene. Lea asks about Elsa & Marysol tells her that they just received flowers. Lea says that she called but couldn’t reach Elsa. Marysol says that was because Elsa was in the hospital. Lea explains that she didn’t know the extent of Elsa’s illness because Marysol kept it very private. Lea attempts to walk away, but Marysol keeps going. Lea says that Marysol asked people not to inform her about Elsa’s condition, but Marysol is upset that Lea “knew” & didn’t investigate? Lea is obviously trying to get away without causing a scene. Marysol keeps hurling insults at Lea’s retreating back. Lisa asks what’s going on & Marysol tells her that Lea knew Elsa was in the hospital but didn’t contact her. Lisa attempts to explain that Lea was respecting Marysol’s wishes to end their relationship, but Marysol doesn’t want to hear it. I agree with Lisa that Lea just couldn’t win in this situation. If she had gone to the hospital, Marysol wouldn’t have welcomed her. She chose to stay away & Marysol is unhappy. I think that Marysol is still angry with Lea about whatever happened at the gala years ago & is taking this opportunity to make her look bad. It makes Marysol come off as though she’s trying to be a victim.
Ana, Lauren & Adriana are watching from the sidelines. Ana can’t help but make nasty comments about Lea & Lisa. She says that Lisa just can’t seem to choose a side. Are we in middle school? You have to choose a side in a fight that doesn’t involve you? Marysol comes over & says that Lea ran away. Alexia says, with glee, that Lea is now scared of Marysol. Lisa points out, in her TH, that Marysol probably doesn’t care when the flowers arrived, she just wants to make Lea look bad. If Marysol didn’t hate Lea so much, it wouldn’t have been a big deal. Lisa goes to find Lisa. Lea tells Lisa that she only came to wish Alexia a happy birthday & was attacked. This may be the first time, since her dog died, that we see Lea exhibit some real emotion. In her TH, Lea discusses her relationship with Elsa and worries what Marysol is saying about Lea.
Marysol again confronts Lea, but in a slightly more calm manner. Marysol explains that her mother almost died & that she is upset that Lea didn’t contact her. Lea explains that she loves Elsa, that she didn’t know about the stroke, and that she sent cards to Elsa’s home. Marysol says that they never received any cards. While this conversation is going on, Ana is lurking in the background, just waiting for her chance to butt in. Surprisingly, it’s Lisa that jumps it. She says that the fight is ridiculous because Marysol & Lea are not friends. I think that if the other women had stayed out of it, maybe Marysol & Lea could have come to some sort of resolution. However, I don’t think Marysol is going to let his go easily. Lea leaves. Lisa asks why Marysol is choosing to attack Lea at this moment. Marysol says that it’s none of Lisa’s business & that she doesn’t know the extent of their issues because she hasn’t known them for very long. Marysol walks away, muttering under breath. Ana jumps in & tells Lisa to stop being Lea’s mouthpiece. Lisa points out that she was standing quietly behind Lea, while Ana was standing behind Marysol. Lisa says that Ana is simply Marysol’s bodyguard & mouthpiece. Ana tells Lisa to stop using her words & asks if Lisa is hooked on phonics. She just can’t help but throw out the little digs, even though they don’t make much sense. I’m not sure what happened between last season & this season, but Ana is now one of the most unhappy & condescending people I’ve seen. On a side note, she recently became engaged to her boyfriend (even after spending last season lamenting the end of her marriage).
Next week is Adriana’s wedding &, from the previews, it seems that we’ve only scratched the surface of her bridezilla behavior.