Real Housewives of Orange County – By Stars99
Remember last week… Shannon went to a REAL doctor because she was having chest pains – I didn’t see any crystals pop out of anywhere so that’s a good sign… Shannon’s marriage is in a very precarious place and we learned that David sent Shannon an email that suggested that he move out for a while (Yes, we can refer to him as “Burger” like Post-it-Note breakup guy from Sex in the City)… And, since an episode is not complete without at least one “Friendship Summit” – Heather and Tamra have one because Tamra’s segment on “Good Day LA” didn’t go as well as she had hoped… Briana is having a baby boy… And the last scene was Shannon going over to Tamra’s house because she was distraught her relationship issues with David…
This is an appropriate time to remind everyone of Over-Sharing-Shannon’s tagline this season: “The OC is full of secrets – But I have nothing to hide.”
This episode begins with Tamra and Shannon still at Tamra’s house discussing Shannon’s marital issues. Evidently, according to their blogs, Shannon had phoned Tamra to tell her about David’s email and Tamra told Shannon to come over anytime she needed to talk. So the next day, Shannon shows up at Tamra’s house. Shannon says she doesn’t know what’s going to happen to her family. She evidently has observed that when David looks at the kids his eyes light up and sparkle – but that when he looks at Shannon they’re just black. So I guess we need to add “Doesn’t have sparkly enough eyes” to David’s ever-growing laundry list of wrongdoings (I suggest that David purchase some blue colored contacts…lol). Tamra asks how long this has been going on and Shannon thinks it’s been since the kids were born. Shannon has had allergy issues (I hear that Aviva from RHONYC has an inhaler she’s almost learned how to use and a brand new note from her doctor that Shannon can borrow). Shannon’s issues were so bad that she had 2 surgeries 6-7 years ago (Now THAT is how you prove you have a REAL medical issue – Take note, Aviva…lol… Pun intended…lol…) It was hard for him to get quality sleep because of Shannon’s allergy issues – So they don’t often sleep in the same room.
While sitting there talking, Shannon gets a text from David. He said he was told that Heather Dubrow was seen at a table in a restaurant with some other women and they were all talking about the email Shannon received from David. Shannon lets Tamra read the text on her cell phone and said that she hasn’t told anyone anything. Tamra quickly lies through her teeth and says she didn’t say anything to Heather. I mean, Tamra even lies to us in her talking head by insisting that she didn’t tell Heather anything because Shannon and Heather are enemies. Tamra tries to convince us that she would never go and tell Heather something about her enemy because it would just make Tamra look like a “big, giant, a***hole.” Okay, so tell us something we didn’t already know, Tamra. Now you just look like a “big, giant, LYING LIAR WHO LIES a***hole.”
you can actually see the blazing light of enlightenment switching on in Shannon’s multi-jeweled head regarding Tamra. The thing is – Shannon knows that she had only told Tamra about the email at that point of time. Well, Tamra and the camera crew filming at her doctor’s office. Shannon knows exactly how Heather found out the information. Shannon crazily tells Tamra to her face that she believes her 100% when Tamra continues to insist that she didn’t say anything to Heather. Whoa… Have you even met our honest widdle TamTam, Shannon? Obviously not… Shannon really can’t be THAT naïve, can she? No seriously… Can she?
Vicki receives an award in the mail, “For Outstanding Achievement in Picking Creepy Boyfriends” from Allianz Financial Services (Okay, so I added that last part… but she really has outdone herself in that category, no? lol…). While making a powdered drink for dinner, she calls Brooks (Ugh – Shiver…). She and Brooks really don’t see each other too much because they’re both so busy (Vicki is busy working while Brooks is busy seeing other women – I mean allegedly and stuff) so they spend a lot of time on the phone (There are just not enough wet wipes in the world to sanitize that phone after hearing Brooks’ voice, right?). They’re going on a trip to Puerto Vallarta and Vicki invited David and Shannon to meet them there. (Ugh – This means we’ll see some Brooks in the not-so-distant-future – KMN!).
Out of one side of her mouth, Shannon tells us that while she was at Tamra’s house that David came home from work early just to say he was sorry. Shannon says she is 100% committed to do whatever it takes to make their relationship work.
While out of the other side of her mouth, Shannon once again openly criticizes David to the kids when she snottily tells them that their Daddy is a creature of habit – Every day he eats the same thing – At the same time. David equally snottily responds that perhaps if dinner was ready when he got home that he wouldn’t HAVE to eat chips and salsa. Okay, this is NOT rocket science… Why is it so hard for Shannon to grasp the concept that when you come home from a long day’s work that you’re hungry? How about preparing a tasty snack for him instead of berating him? How about surprising him by making some kewl appetizers for him to eat to tide him over until dinner? And… gasp… How about sitting down with him while enjoying the snack together? Naw… that’s just too easy…
Shannon shows up unannounced at Heather’s house. She’s on a mission to find out exactly how Heather knew about her husband’s email. Heather mistakenly thinks Shannon is there to apologize to her since the last time she saw her was at the Christmas Party when Shannon was scolding her. So, of course, this is all going to go well, right?
Shannon is actually really keeping her cool with Heather. Shannon repeatedly tries to play the, “I’m a Mother – You’re a Mother” empathy card but Heather all but tells her to “Go Fish.” The rumors that Heather is helping to perpetuate about the problems in Shannon’s marriage have the potential to really hurt Shannon’s children. However, Her Royal Heatherness is just so blinded by her own self-righteousness that she is unable to see that she is culpable in any way in this whole scenario. I think Shannon is just fighting through the swirling lies, feared betrayal and roller coaster emotions while hoping that the truth somehow won’t cause her to lose her marriage or her friendship with Tamra. When hearing that Heather is still so upset about what she said at the Christmas Party, Shannon apologizes and explains her feelings.
After talking about Heather’s issues (Because isn’t it always all about Heather?) Shannon wants to get back to her issue and directly asks Heather if “anyone” told her about what was going on with her relationship. Heather clarifies that they must be talking about Tamra. Heather explains that she and Tamra had lunch and that Tamra feels she is a kindred spirit with Shannon. Tamra had told Heather that Shannon is going through what Tamra went through 4 years ago when she was in a bad place, her marriage was falling apart, and she was drinking too much. Shannon wanted clarification that Tamra said Shannon’s marriage was falling apart and that she’s drinking too much… (Cue Shannon reaching for the very strong drink Terry had poured for her earlier and then taking a long, deliberate swig… lol). Heather is okay with disclosing this information to Shannon because she’s confident that if Tamra was there that she would say the same thing. Heather could have completely thrown Tamra under the bus… but didn’t.
Heather said that she is surprised that Shannon came to her house and is asking her questions about things she may or may not know because she really doesn’t owe her anything. I doubt Heather would give Shannon the time of day much less roll over on a friend for her. Shannon tells Heather that it’s true she doesn’t “owe” her anything – but that it has come to her attention that Heather has been talking to other people about Shannon’s marriage. Shannon wants to know who gave Heather the information. In her talking head, Heather wonders why if Shannon told Tamra stuff about her marriage – And then Tamra told Heather – Why is Shannon mad at Heather? (Ummm… Could it be because you’re flapping your jaws about Shannon’s marriage to other people?).
The thing is… Three people screwed up: 1) Shannon should NEVER have divulged anything to Tamra that she didn’t want broadcasted to the entire world (And she probably shouldn’t have signed-up to be on a reality show when her marriage was already in trouble for that matter, either); 2) Tamra should have NEVER said anything to anyone (Except perhaps, Eddie) about Shannon’s marital problems – Much less Shannon’s “favorite” person in the world, Heather… It just pours salt in the already gaping and festering wound… Shame on Tamra – She knows first-hand how deeply it hurts to go through marital problems; and, 3) Heather should have NEVER said anything to anyone (But perhaps, Terry) about Shannon’s marital issues. Remember, just last season, Heather went ballistic when Terry confessed to the others on the show that he had mistakenly used the “D” word (Divorce) with Heather at one point in their marriage. Even though it had happened in the past, Heather flipped a freakin’ fig that he told the others on the show about it. Now, she’s doing the same thing but way worse to Shannon but she can’t see her own culpability.
Shannon’s audience with Her Royal Heatherness is quickly coming to a close. Heather tells Shannon to go talk to the person spreading rumors – and Shannon finally directly tells Heather that she was told it was Heather who was spreading the rumors. Heather implies that if she and Shannon were on “better terms” that she would be more forthcoming. This seems to just “infurryate” Shannon (Holla to ya, Gretchen!)… Heather is done with all of this and pointedly asks Shannon to leave. Shannon dutifully leaves – but I think it was only because Terry had already taken away her drink (It was still pretty full… lol). Terry was sitting and listening to the entire conversation – and when Shannon left he had this really awful smirk on his face.
Shannon calls David while she’s driving home and tells him she’s on her way home from Heather’s house. She just feels so betrayed by Tamra because she knows Tamra is the one who told Heather because she’s the only one Shannon told about the situation. Shannon thought she would receive compassion from Heather but instead Her Royal Heatherness kicked Shannon out of her house. Shannon’s never been kicked out of a house before this… Well, it’s a good thing Shannon didn’t eat a piece of frosting off of Heather’s cake ‘cuz Heather would have gone batcrapcrazy! David tells Shannon that he’s so sorry it happened… He asks if Shannon is okay to drive… He tells her that he’s there for her when she gets home. Shannon thinks that if someone showed up on her doorstep as distraught as she was – that she would help them out in whatever way she could. She uses this to demonstrate this is a BIG difference between her and Heather De Bow…errr… Dubrow (Sorry, was still thinking about that icing bow…)…lol.
The rest of the episode basically deals with the rehashing of these events to other cast members. Shannon tells Lizzie and Danielle (Who?) what happened when they conveniently came over for an essential oil demonstration with a naturalist. Lizzie maintains that if Heather did throw Shannon out of her home – that she probably had a good reason to do so. She thinks Heather has a “deliberate sense of explaining herself.” Lizzie also doesn’t think Tamra maliciously wanted to hurt Shannon. Lizzie seems to believe the best about others – Except when their name is Vicki…lol.
Heather and Terry meet with Lizzie to tell their version of the events concerning Shannon. Lizzie had already heard Shannon’s perspective. Heather talks about the “Friendship Summit” she had with Tamra. She explains she went from there to a luncheon with some close friends and acquaintances. Someone asks Heather if she had heard from Shannon since the Christmas Party. Heather told them “No” – but that she didn’t think Shannon was in a particularly good place at the moment because she got a funky email from her husband. Some of the others started putting in their 2 cents about what they had heard about David and Shannon’s marriage. Heather said that she told them she felt weird talking about the subject. She shut down the whole conversation which had lasted for about a minute or so. Lizzie doesn’t think that Heather’s gossiping about Shannon was that cool but that she’s not going to abandon her friend just because she doesn’t agree with everything she does. Heather then talks about Shannon’s impromptu visit to her house. Heather said that they don’t live in a very big house at the moment and that since she could hear her 2 kids playing in the next room (in her blog she says that she knew at that point that if she could hear her kids that her kids could also hear her) – She asked Shannon to leave. Heather texted Shannon after she left and said that she was sorry she was so upset – and that Shannon’s problem was not with Heather. Shannon did not respond to her text. I wouldn’t have either.
Other things of note: 1) Lizzie asked her ob/gyn about various strategies she’s heard about how one can ensure they will get pregnant with a girl – Fortunately, her doctor quickly dispels all of the myths; 2) Tamra and Eddie get a robot practice baby in the mail that only stops crying when he suckles on Eddie’s pecks (I kid you not…); and, 3) Tamra and Shannon have a “Friendship Summit” and Tamra orders a “Karma Tequila” of all things. Really, Tamra, do you think it’s a good idea for YOU to order something called, “Karma?” Lol… Tamra confesses to Shannon that she feels stupid and horrible that she told Heather about what Shannon had told her in confidence. She tried to spin it that she told Heather about the situation in a, “Can you just kind of lay off Shannon and leave her alone for a while” kind of way. Tamra insisted that Heather promised not to repeat their conversation.
Shannon feels betrayed by Tamra. Shannon told Tamra about her meeting with Heather and how she had apologized for what she said at the party. We all know Tamra is an opportunist who knows the bus schedule by heart so that she knows which way to aim her close friends when she throws them under the next bus… Tamra immediately said that Heather told her specifically that Shannon had never apologized to her. Way to go, Tamra! Shannon says, “What Heather Dubrow did to me – there’s no word to describe it other than cruel…”
After Tamra says she’s sorry again… Shannon tells her that it meant something to her that at least Tamra is “owning it” (Jill, No Not THAT Jill but the Other One and Tiara will be oh, so proud…lol). In her talking head, Shannon says that when you lie about something as serious as Tamra has lied about – that she doesn’t think there’s any way to ever trust that person again… ever.
Note: I purposefully left out everything about Vicki and Brooks in Puerto Vallarta to spare you all. Let’s just say that Vicki and Brooks get professional massages and that we see WAY too much of Brooks. You can’t unsee that… You just can’t. I’m scarred for life.
Next week… David and Shannon arrive in Puerto Vallarta and honestly, I can’t believe I heard it myself – but Vicki uses her relationship with Brooks as an example of a “Healthy Couple” and that it would be good for Shannon and David to be around them… Ack… gag… glub… lol… It looks like there’s more rehashing of stuff and Shannon feels like everyone is criticizing her relationship. Sigh.
Well, that’s all for this week… Thanks for reading – See ya next week! Happy Trails!