Don’t Be Tardy
S3E2 “Crowd Control”
Last week, in the season opener, Kim and Kroy’s twins were delivered and the chaos begins. This week the reality of having six kids and four of them under the age of 2-1/2 sets in. Kim is outdoors on a sunny winter day, pushing a stroller with the twins bundled up inside. Kash is along side and takes a spill off his scooter. Waaah! Kim picks him up, dusts him off and assures him he will be okay. Kroy is pulling KJ on a toy with wheels, which didn’t follow the turn and he took a spill too. Waaah! Waaah! Luckily the twins don’t have anything to cry about yet.
Brielle and Ariana come up to ask for something. Brielle wants to drive the Range Rover to the mall. Kim balks that since she’s wrecking cars she can’t take the Rover, but she can take the Honda. Brielle is beside herself to have to go anywhere in the gold Honda. Waaah! I’m not sure why she keeps referring to it as the gold Honda, I hardly think they have another Honda in their garage and it doesn’t look gold on my TV. Brielle carries on about the embarrassment, how the other kids drive this and that, and here she is in this crappy gold Honda. She whines to her Mother again, and Kim tells Brielle she is lucky to have a car at all! Kroy comes and backs that up with the fact she has wrecked four of their cars (what?!). Kim said, the funny thing is the only vehicle she hasn’t wrecked is the Honda. Ariana, clearly not understanding how negotiating with parents works; defends her sister by saying “but she hasn’t wrecked anything in three months!”
Back in the house, Kim asks if there’s a skin tightening machine and Troy replied, “its’ called exercise.” Chuckles. Sweetie is in the kitchen trying to show Kim how to eat healthy and Kim’s not interested. Sweetie tries to impress upon Kim that it’s for the long haul and Kim said that she’s not going to eat a salad unless she needs to shit. Kroy ribs Kim about her sweet tooth and confirms what I thought all along, she’s a sugar-holic with high metabolism. Kim says they need a Chef to help her eat better, because she doesn’t have time to cook with the babies. Matter of fact, she needs a nanny for the twins, a housekeeper and a pool boy. Interesting that it’s the dead of winter and she puts pool boy on her wish list. Now, I am aware pools need tended to year round, especially in the south, but I’m just saying I don’t believe a pool caretaker and house cleaner were not already employed!
Kim said she needs all this help so Kroy can focus on his recovery and training as to be a fucking beast on the field next season, for which she immediately recoils realizing she her language in front of the little ones. Some things about Kim will never change, but I would have to say her potty mouth has been cut in half with the babies around…if that’s any consolation. Back to the task at hand; is everyone on board now with the fact that Kim needs all this help for Kroy? And Kim doesn’t want the hired hands to be good looking either. I guess that’s for Kroy too?!
We see the four way security monitors and hear a cry. Kroy and Kim run like crazy upstairs because they know that cry means KJ is really hurt. Seems to have been horseplaying with the Nanny, Lana. There was a fall and he hurt his leg. Kim, Kroy, KJ and Lana leave immediately for the doctor. The x-ray shows a fracture in his leg, and Lana immediately begins to cry and honestly, she balled a lot more than the boy. She felt guilty he was hurt on her watch. KJ got a cast and Kroy asks if he wants ice cream on the way home.
Back at home Kroy, with his foot propped up on ice (you might recall, he is recovering from achilles tendon re-attachment surgery) and KJ is in a large stroller with his leg in a cast propped up and they are eating their ice cream. Kroy has a walkie talkie so he can communicate with Kim in their big house. Kim is dealing with the babies and wanting to cook dinner. Kroy is calling back and forth and he said she could bring the baby and he will hold her. So she leaves Kaia with him and begins to cook in the kitchen. Kroy, on the walkie talkie said Kaia spit up on him, so off runs Kim. They do a good job at demonstrating what is, I’m sure, real life chaos, but it doesn’t go without notice that her teenage daughters were shocked she was trying to cook dinner. Chuckles.
Kim looks to be serious about cooking, but is distracted, she has so many people in the kitchen, there’s Sweetie holding Kane. There’s Kroy’s voice again, he’s enjoying aggravating her with the walkie talkie. Kim talks about it was a hard day, with the broken leg and they crying and Brielle jumps in to say it was Lana’s fault. Lana runs full speed out of the room crying. Kim is upset that Brielle doesn’t have a filter and now she has hurt Lana’s feelings. The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it. Kim tells Brielle to go to Lana and apologize and that didn’t seem good enough, so Kim schools her in how to apologize properly. Meanwhile, the ravioli on the stove is ruined and they’ll have to order in pizza.
It’s a new day at the Biermann house, and we find Kroy bathing one of the twins in a portable baby tub that is set up on an island in the kitchen. Kroy bathing that baby was the best few seconds of the entire episode! Kim realizes there is someone walking outside around the pool. She goes to investigate and it’s apparently a mini David Beckham-ish pool boy that explains he was hired by Sweetie. Kim goes back in the house realizing she’ll have to keep her teenage girls away from the pool boy.
In marches a young woman decked out in a very form fitted denim top, with an open midriff, matching tight pants, heels and a broom. Her name is Jam and she is on a mission to clean. Jam apologized for her attire, saying she dressed for an interview and didn’t know she would be hired to start on the spot. Umm hmm.
It seems Sweetie took the conversation seriously about getting help, except the request they not be good looking. Later a Chef would show up and Kim will taste his food, but ultimately is sent packing because he’s too wholesome, more of what Sweetie wants to eat than the home cooking Kim had in mind for her family. The new help showing up unannounced, acting like they belonged was funny, regardless of how staged it might seem. I don’t think Kim or Kroy knew what they would look like!
Kat From Ohio