Brandi Glanville Podcast by Kit9
Brandi wants to Know Why Lisa has a Problem with Brandi making out with Girls
She reads something her son wrote about her for class which I don’t quite understand but involves a headdress, an African tribe, and women’s rights. In it he calls his mother “fierce, loving and kind”. He also calls her crazy and vicious. It’s pretty damn cute, I have to say. She explains him calling her vicious because she told her kids she could snap a coyote’s neck–a lie she told so they wouldn’t be afraid of them(yeah, makes no sense to me, either. Does she want them trying to pet them?).
Brandi talks the “Sony Pictures hacked by North Korea shit”. Again she says she thinks that the whole thing is a hoax(again, I’ll say, she’s a freaking moron.). “It’s a hoax, I KNOW it”. She says that when she saw the news anchors saying it on tv that she didn’t think THEY believed it(facepalm). Brandi claims, as she has in the past, that Seth Rogen said he would do her podcast and she says that when it’s revealed to be a hoax, she’s going to call him out on it(this I would love to hear!).
Brandi wonders “what else is going on in the news?” and tells us that she’s got some tabloids with her(got that? She’s referring to the tabloids as “the news”) Brandi reads from The Star about Timberlake getting divorced. She doesn’t believe it. She mentions some rumor out there about her having x-mas dinner with Eddie and Leann. She’s not. She thinks all tabloid stories have a little bit of truth about it(so, she’s having lunch with them instead?).
Brandi jokes about being close to getting her “comedian’s license”. She then wonders what it takes for someone to be called a comedian(talent, genius. See also: people not named Brandi Glanville). She apparently mentioned Del Taco in both her books and they’ve sent her gift cards as a result. She goes on about their food at length. She says their food is not unhealthy.
She talks her new car and whines, again, about what a gas hog it is. They talk the Honey Boo Boo porn tape(what?). Brandi knows the owner of porn studio Vivid(shocker!)and wonders if she should call him to see if it’s true. Brandi likes TMZ. It’s where she goes when she wants gossip(didn’t she just claim she isn’t interested in gossip or did I dream that?).
Brandi claims to have killed a rattlesnake in her yard as her son filmed it. Brandi has falsely accused friends of hers of selling stories to the tabloids. Others actually have and they’re no longer friends. Stephen Doriff has been hitting on Brandi for 13 years.
Brandi talks about going to Kathy Hilton’s X-mas party and dancing with Vanna White and Daisy Duke(real bunch of A-listers). Then Kathy Hilton prank called people. NO joke. Kathy was grabbing people’s phones looking for celebrity numbers to call to prank. She called Andy Cohen doing a phony voice at 4am and he hung up!
Brandi talks her WWHL appearance and claims that Andy handed her the list of questions to ask him in their turn the tables segment. Brandi wanted to come up with her own questions. Brandi says that Leann took meetings with the Housewives producers and that she also approached Andy about being on his show. At least that’s what she’s heard.
Brandi decides to pull a Kathy Hilton and prank call someone. The lucky winner is Chelsea Handler’s brother, Roy, a friend of Brandi’s. She going to try to get dirt on Chelsea. He doesn’t answer. Then she has her producer call her book agent pretending to be calling about her agent’s dog’s health insurance.
He tells him that the dog has some type of herpes that can infect humans. He tells the agent that the dog’s health insurance could be canceled unless the dog takes a course of antibiotics. Her agent has no clue what he’s talking about and doesn’t understand when they could have given his dog the test. The call goes on and on and on. Hilarious, right?(it’s actually even less funny than it sounds if that’s possible). Brandi snickers in the background.
When Brandi let’s him in on the joke, her agent says, “that’s not funny” and hangs up on her. She calls him back and he hangs up on her again which Brandi finds hilarious. Brandi takes calls. Someone calls to thank Brandi for helping raising funds for a single mother affected by Ferguson. Not clear what this is about.
Brandi tells the next caller who is a fan that she just tries to be real while some of the other ladies on the show put on “a front”. The caller mentions that Lisa Vanderpump “freaked out” when Brandi made out with a woman but now owns a gay bar. Brandi says, yes, that is ironic and says that Lisa has owned, like, 17 gay bars in London and now has one here. And, Brandi asks, “If it’s boys, it’s OK, if it’s girls it’s not?”
The caller goes onto say that she’s baffled by Lisa’s reaction when so much of her money comes from the gay community. Brandi says that Lisa would like it if she just kissed her once. Brandi says that Lisa is a “good sport” and she gets it for guys but not for girls. The caller asks if Brandi would ever date a woman again. Brandi says she’d like to be a full lesbian because her friends are better than the men in her life.
She’s open to it and would marry her best friend Trina(who?)but she’s married. This caller I think has a wee crush on Brandi. Brandi says she’s the closest thing to bi-sexual on the Housewives. Next caller wants to know how scripted the show really is. Brandi says there is no script and if there was she wouldn’t get in so much trouble.
Aside from knowing where they are going so they can get permission to film there, there is no script. The caller asks specifically about the scene where she’s with Kyle and they call Lisa. She wants to know if Brandi knew she was going to do that beforehand. No, and that she would have charged her phone if she did.
But then Brandi says, “They set up the hike, obviously”. Production asked what they wanted to do and Brandi said exercise. She says they run out of things to do. And, she says sometimes they’ll tell her to have her phone on at specific times-sometimes a call comes, sometimes it doesn’t.
Her producer tells her people love her and women want to be like her. Brandi talks “haters” and says that they’re cowards so they don’t call in. Brandi says what she thinks she lacks an embarrassment “gene”(I think she lacks a dignity gene).
She tried to get her ex to come on her show but he said no. She says some nice things about JR before saying that it’s good to stay on good terms with ex’s who may have “pictures and videos of you”(oh, joy. We can all look forward to the inevitable Brandi sex tape at some point?). She talks about that stupid corset and how it took a week before she could get the thing fastened all the way up. But, she’s still wearing it.
Trainer calls Kim Richard’s Dog Kingsley the most Dangerous Dog he’s Ever Met
The following is from a facebook post on Christmas Eve from Kyle Schwab, a trainer who worked with Kim Richard’s dog Kingsley.
Kyle reposted some photos of bite marks from one of Kingsley’s alleged victims, then wrote;
“Police evidence photos of one of four victims thus far from the same dog. Kingsley. The dog owned by one of the real housewives of BH. It took me four hours to subdue him and be able to work with him. I believe his nest victim could end in death. He is the single most dangerous dog I have ever worked with. And if I didn’t go there with the proper equipment. I wouldn’t be typing this right now.”
Asked: “Did Kim relinquish Kingsley to you I hope? He almost bit the “trainer” that came to work with him?”
The trainer responded: “Kingsley never showed up the next Wed morning after I worked with him and made room. I believe I was his only hope. Even though he tried to kill me. I thought he was workable and was going to do a joint custody thing where he was with me during filming for the safety of the staff and crew. And or I would maintain him on set (off camera) during filming days. I will tell you he is the most dangerous dog I have worked with in terms of his level of aggression. I’ve trained more dangerous dogs like Neos and Corsos. But I have never experienced such a willingness and drive towards humans as Kingsley. One trainer was attacked, one was unable to enter the house, one FaceTimed Kim and was unwilling to enter the house. I walked in and worked with him and Kim for four hours. I’ll be seeing them in court after the new year for non payment.
He has been removed from the house and according to Kim herself. The trainers at the boarding/training facility where he’s at are unable to approach him. After that. Radio silence. They will not return my calls, texts, or emails. They have now registered the dog in someone else’s name thinking the bite history won’t follow him. He a dangerous dog in the hands of the wrong people and I will get paid for my work. I have all the documentation, pictures, texts, and videos. Interesting that coming to the end of the year my only two outstanding invoices are celebrities. Or in this case. A wanna be. Can you say “entitled” Kim is not emotionally or physically capable of handling this dog.
It will strike again. It’s not if. It’s when. Unless they just keep it in the $6,000 cage Bravo built in her backyard. I’m not going to put my life in danger and not get paid.
It’s principle. Not the money. Where there’s risk. There’s reward. Until you deal with entitled celebrities.”
UPDATE: more from Kyle
Asked about why he was sharing about Kim on facebook, he answered:
“I don’t owe anybody any respect that calls me in as a last resort after multiple trainers have failed this dog. Kim is no different then anyone else except she’s entitled and has now re-registered this dog in someone else’s name in attempts to limit liability. And try to make a dog with a propensity and bite history disappear. But it’s the same county and same address. I went back and read my comment which was an answer to someone’s question. Since when did dog training become a privacy issue ? I trained multiple celebrities dogs and been on set to maintain dogs for shows and commercials.
The difference is I’ve always been paid. Your comments are absurd. I’ll just leave them for people to see. If you knew anything about the four cases. The common denominator is that Kim blames the victim every time. That’s how sad this is. And now he’s going to pay with his life. I was the only stranger able to approach him (per Kim herself) and she’s now fucked him and jeopardized his safety. And the safety of others. Here’s the kicker…….. Someone leaked that I was there and every media and online outlet wants the story. I actually kept it under wraps even with their offers.”
And more from Kyle – responding on whether or not he wanted to be on the show: “ I wanna be on the Price is Right and play Plinko. Or Judge Judy to be yelled at. Other then that, I will continue to take the multiple TV offers and kabosh them like I’ve been doing for the last 10 years.
It’s never been about the money for me. I could have been a made man in 07 with Discovery Ch’s offer. But they made a big mistake. They tried to script me. A year or my life wasted on negotiations and pilots. Real is raw, no editing. That’s how they drew me in. By telling me everything I wanted to hear. Then came the storyboards, line producers, actors, fake girlfriends, and hot super model co-hosts.
Basically taking away the true, raw, grit of what I do. And the real calls I get to pick up dead dogs, or remove dangerous dogs. They called it “too harsh” I called it life. They said they needed people to get to know the “real Kyle” Things like my friends, family, girlfriend, dinners, etc…..
All shit filler that had nothing to do with the dogs. Just shit to boost ratings in middle America where they said: “They won’t get you if we don’t add elements of your real life, love life, etc……. Eventually someone will want to follow me around. And it may be to extreme for prime-time. But I think it’s time people know about the death and destruction that a real Pit Bull rescuer faces. And what I am called out to do, and what I see. I remember specifically my producers saying we need resolve at the end of each episode. I responded: That’s the thing. There’s not always resolve. So they creatively created one. Well that’s what you’re watching when you watch reality tv. BULLSHIT.”