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Real Housewives of Melbourne
Season 2 Episode 1 ~ Fresh Start, New Faces by Reality_Bytes
Hey there…new to blogging for this site, hope you enjoy! Be easy on me if this isn’t exact – it was a fast-paced show!
The long-awaited (at least by me) beginning of a fresh new season for these Saucy Aussie newbies aired last night. Many people in the U.S. didn’t see the first season from the beginning, even though they may have caught a few of the episodes before it finished, so for a great recap of season 1, please see the Season 1 recap by Veena. I feel sure with one season under their belt, the ladies will be able to ‘hit their stride’ soon.
I am gonna be straight up with y’all from the start – my favorites from last season are Gina and Chyka…Chyka for her easygoing personality and business and social acumen, and Gina because she kept me laughing the entire season with her dry wit and one-liners.
And giving their one liners their due – I love the taglines the housewives use in their introductions, because I feel that is how they see themselves, not necessarily how anyone else might perceive them, so it is fun to watch and see if they really match.
For Season 2 the taglines are:
“Style is an attitude, not something you can buy…”
“Gamble on me and you’re sure to win…”
“I deal in fact – not friction…”
“Make light of me all you want, but I’m still going to shine!”
“Some people have ups and downs – I have roller coaster rides!”
“I love tradition but I’m no traditional housewife…”
“This little flower is no shrinking violet!”
Alrighty then…let’s get started and see how closely the gals described themselves.
This was a very disjointed episode for me in the way they chose to go from present to flashback to future and back, and I am sure they felt it the best way to introduce the new housewives and allow them to have a bit to say about themselves as an introduction.
All arriving separately of course, Chyka, Jackie, and Lydia all meet up for a drink and to catch up with each other. Jackie managed not 1 but 2 sexual references in as many minutes while ordering drinks – the woman has no filters! While there, Janet calls from her car inviting them all to her big birthday bash, and immediately they want to know if she is going to invite Gina…and Janet being the bigger person says she wants to because she wants to put the past behind them and start fresh…and to the camera says – she has known Gina for years and they are Frenemies…LOL. Good for you Janet! After the phone call the girls continue to talk about Janet’s new boyfriend (Carlos?) who we later find is not really her boyfriend – whatever.
Janet then arrives to meet Carlos who is supposed to be providing the venue, food & drink for Janet’s party. The bad news is the venue he was going to have ready will not be ready, so Janet goes into this whole diatribe about how all the “girls” have already decided where they will park, where they will enter the building, how to get there and on and on and now will have to Google a new address and reprogram their GPS. This is an OMG for me! Not at the GPS stuff, but at my first realization that Janet must have had a boatload of Botox injected since last year, or a facelift because even as she goes on and on about the venue change – her expression doesn’t – her face won’t move – at all!
Back to Chyka, Jackie and Lydia still drinking…Chyka goes on and on about trusting Jackie’s psychic abilities and some lumps she found out were really just cysts – so she is a believer now because Jackie told her everything would be fine! I can’t tell just what Chyka was drinking, but does Kool-Aid make a clear beverage? Lydia talks about her step-son’s upcoming wedding and regardless of which lady was talking Jackie was always interrupting.
12 minutes into the show and no Gina yet???
We now follow Janet to her hairdresser and she arrives with all her dress choices for her party and needs his opinion as to which to wear. She describes him as a dark-haired Fabio – NOT! First he isn’t that attractive, and his stringy hair barely reached his shoulders…anyhoooooooo…blah blah blah she goes on talking about the venue change and GINA! How she wants to invite her, so she calls her and leaves a message inviting her and was happy she got voice mail. Well maybe to her chagrin…Janet’s cell rings and it was Gina returning her call. They speak briefly and Gina accepts the invitation to Janet’s party.
16 minutes in and only Gina’s voice…Hmmm
BUT WAIT…they show Gina walking down the street to meet his sister Bettina for lunch and they catch her walking just under the signage for a storefront which reads…wait for it…wait for it…”THE BITCH IS BACK”. I almost fell off the sofa…what a grand sense of humor this woman has. Because no one will convince me that Gina didn’t plan that one with production! Well played Gina!
So Gina and Bettina have a pleasant lunch it seems. Bettina asks how Gina’s relationship is going and she says they broke up for a minute, but things are great now – he is in Los Angeles and she may move to be with him. I am willing to bet he moves back to Australia but we will have to wait and see. During lunch Gina talks about the fact that she does make fun of things (and people) because she has a wicked sense of humor but it is meant to be lite and humorous. She also reveals that her friendship with Lydia is like a broken glass – you can put it back together but it still has cracks! (I can almost hear Lydia saying WOW, can’t you?)
Janet is now off to the “let them eat cake” bakery to choose her cake, but in the process of making decisions, the baker seems to be giving her more life advice than cake choices, he challenges her budget and ends up saying “Do you want a cake or not?” She looks taken aback…and then…invites him to the party, talking about having a red carpet and everything!
Next shows Lydia trying on a dress and talking with her mother who doesn’t seem to be much of a fan of Gina but unexpected in my mind, Lydia sticks up for the past problems saying nice things about people have other things going on sometimes and things are said in haste and at the end of the day, they should all try and get along. Lydia has already offered to pick Gina up in her car and perhaps they can mend fences on the way to the party. BRAVO Lydia!
The car ride starts out pretty awkward, but they end up talking and for outward appearances all is well. They both made an open attempt and agree to move forward.
There really IS a red carpet!
The rest of the party moves fast and jumps around a lot so I am just going to bullet point bits in no particular order because my head will explode if I try to get all this in the correct sequence. I will say at this point in the recap…once these ladies hit their stride…the episodes will be much smoother…production really crammed a lot into an hour show (40 minutes without commercials)
Here we go:
- Jackie arrives with Chyka and heads straight for the booze…nothing new there
- Gamble shows up at the party and camera shot shows her saying her goal in life is to count calories – flash to her with her boyfriend of 5 years asking what is for dinner and she replies “I have some frozen peas.” Gamble loves dogs, loves to paint and has a Pomeranian named Cash. Her boyfriend is an eye surgeon and she calls him ‘wolfie’, and she says it was lust at first sight. She also says she is a jealous person and has a bad temper. (So they must have her replacing Andrea…LOL?)
- Janet greets guests and announces she has invited straights, gays, undecideds, older and younger people – but mostly hopes her son will show up. NOTE: her son Jake was in an accident and burned over 70% of his body and it has been a long road back for him.
- Jake does make it to the party and Janet is so happy.
- Gina and Lydia walk in and Janet immediately announces to the women she is talking to that “The Drag Queen has entered the building”
- Gamble says “that was mean”
- Chyka asks Gamble what she has heard about Gina
- Gamble says she has heard she is not very punctual…LOL
- Jackie greets Gina with a hug and so does Janet, and they all greet Lydia as well
- Gamble says Gina looks gorgeous
- Gamble says she doesn’t get good vibes from Lydia
- Pettifleur arrives and in introduced to the ladies
- Pettifleur talks a bit about herself to the camera… that she lives in the penthouse of the most expensive building, she is a property developer, been with her partner for 8 years, has 2 sons, always hated the idea of being a kept woman so made her own money (or ‘coin’ as Jackie would say) and thinks everyone else must be thinking about her as “What does this fabulous bitch have?” (I also didn’t have enough fingers and toes to count the number of times she used the word bitch!)
- Gina tells the camera that Pettifleur is like a little “Pocket Rocket”
- Then Pettifleur tells Gina she goes “Commando” …OY VEY!
- Pettifleur says she has run into Gamble a few times and her fashion sense is a bit hit and miss
After this flurry, the cake finally arrives, they all toast Janet and then Janet ends the show by saying her party was wonderful but she is glad it is over. (And so am I because my head is still spinning from note taking and typing!)
I am sure the show will flow a bit better from now on when we don’t have such an information overload as we did with all the introductions and the party to contend with, so press on ladies of Melbourne, and we will see you next week.