Southern Charm – Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner
Cameran has a new office for her real estate business. We get to meet her mother, Bonnie, who is so cute! Although Cameran is now married to a doctor, she realizes that she needs to be able to support herself. She’s been working from home and has to earn the office space from her company. Bonnie is a healthcare specialist and is letting Cameran use an open office in her building. Cameran needs a space to work that isn’t in her house. I agree that it can be hard to get motivated when there isn’t a differentiation between home life and work life.
Shep is helping Landon move onto a boat. She needs her own space. Landon grew up in Georgia and went to school in Charleston, but she’s also lived in Europe and LA. She’s a southern girl with a twist. Her family is in Charleston, so she moved back after her divorce. It’s been two years since her relationship ended. They were together for 7 years and Landon lived a spoiled life. She walked away from the staff and the jewelry. She tells us that the things weren’t fulfilling enough and that she was very lonely. The boat is small, but perfect for a single girl. They sit on deck and watch dolphins in the bay. That would be pretty cool, but I tend to get motion sick so a boat wouldn’t work for long term.
Kathryn visits so that Cameran can show her some Charleston properties. Kathryn is tired of living so far away from town. I can imagine how lonely that gets. Kathryn wants to live downtown, but Cameran tells her that Mount Pleasant would be better for a family. Downtown would have lots of temptation for the young mother. She went from a party girl to motherhood very quickly.
Back at Patricia’s, Patricia is interviewing a second butler. The house is so large that they need two butlers. She expects breakfast in bed, the silver to be polished, the paintings to be dusted. The butler learned to cook from Emeril and Paul Prudhomme. That would do it for me! He’d be hired! Patricia needs him to make a martini before he can be officially hired. The martini is a hit and Jesse is hired. Patricia doesn’t have a husband, right now, so she fills the house with butlers. Whitney arrives and they talk about the second christening. Patricia says that Kathryn has no hostess skills. Cut to Kathryn covering salmon with mayonnaise for dinner. Hmm. They are a traditional family – Thomas provides finances and Kathryn takes care of the house. Except Kathryn has little skill in the kitchen. Patricia and Whitney aren’t sure that Kathryn can handle hosting dinner parties if Thomas is elected to the Senate. Patricia says that, just because you have a strong family name, doesn’t mean that you have class. Agreed! Patricia blames Whitney for introducing Thomas to Kathryn. Whitney plans to help Thomas with his campaign. Thomas also has some hesitations about how Kathryn’s immaturity will play out in the spotlight. It seems to me that Kathryn is way more serious about this relationship than Thomas. Thomas is hosting a dinner party this week. He’s going to handle all of the details, even though Kathryn offered to help with the catering. She doesn’t plan to be a wallflower though.
Craig and his brother are very competitive, which makes their relationship a little difficult. The two meet up to play lacrosse. His brother plans to take over their father’s company. His brother is surprised that Craig can balance his work and social life. Craig admits that his boss is uneasy that Craig isn’t in the office in the morning. We learn that Craig hasn’t taken the bar exam yet, so he isn’t technically a lawyer. I wonder what the hold-up is. I graduated from law school in May, studied for the bar exam through June and July, then took the exam in late July. Most jobs will expect you to have a license, otherwise you can’t really do much. Craig tells us that he didn’t need to go straight into studying for the bar. He decided to take a break. Must be nice to have a job until you decide to take the bar exam. I would have been fired if I hadn’t been licensed to practice law.
Kathryn calls all of the group to invite them to dinner. She tells them that Thomas has a big announcement. There is some speculation that Thomas has proposed. The dinner is being held at JD’s restaurant. The group starts with cocktails as everyone arrives. JD knows what’s going on, but refuses to tell. Craig arrives. He was supposed to go to Beaufort during the day, but didn’t, so he has to drive two hours after the dinner. He seems to want the lifestyle of a law firm partner, without putting in the time to get there. Kathryn arrives before Thomas. She is dressed very conservatively. Whitney is at band rehearsal. He doesn’t want to witness Thomas make another terrible mistake, so he isn’t planning to attend. The last to arrive is Jennifer. Kathryn isn’t pleased to see her and seems very jealous. She switches to a stiff drink. Jennifer used to date Thomas’ friend.
The group decides to stop waiting for Whitney and sits down for dinner. Whitney strolls in late and a little intoxicated. Kathryn thinks that Whitney is going through a midlife crisis – he’s 47 and in a band. His band name is Renob, which is boner spelled backward. And he says that Kathryn is immature? Thomas makes his announcement – they collected 17,000 signatures and he will be on the ballot for the senatorial election. There is a slightly stunned silence, then the toasts begin. Thomas is confident that he has a shot at winning. Shep thinks that Thomas has an uphill battle. Everyone agrees to help support the campaign. Kathryn seems very uncomfortable. I think she realizes that Thomas isn’t as committed to her as she wants him to be. Cameran begins questioning Thomas about his views on hot topics. I’m kind of impressed that Thomas seems to have a grasp on the issues. Whitney mentions that he thought the announcement would be an engagement between Thomas and Kathryn. Thomas says that they are doing what works for them. Whitney volunteers to bring in friends from LA to help with Thomas’s ad campaign. I’m not sure why Whitney feels qualified to run the campaign.
“Secrets Revealed” – by HydrangeaHussy
I’m skeptical that many secrets will be revealed, but here we go!
Scene 1 – Jax says that he’s in love with people a lot, considering that he’s a commitment phobe. He has Stassi’s name on one arm and Carmen’s on another. He’s already had Stassi’s name covered up, but Tiffany isn’t a fan of her boyfriend having Carmen’s name on his other arm. So now he’s getting Carmen’s name covered up, only one month after he had it put there. He really doesn’t see anything wrong with getting the name of every girl he dates tattooed on himself.
Scene 2 – Kristen and Tom will always have a connection because they have a past. Kristen says that she’s now learned to let go. She and Tom broke up 7 months ago, but she didn’t realize that she and James had been dating 6 months. He’s annoyed that she remembers the date of her breakup and wants Kristen to get rid of Tom completely. They go through her computer and delete all of the pictures of Tom and her. That makes James happy.
Scene 3 – Lisa has 3 restaurants, and has no plans to open a new one. Lisa has a test dinner at Pump before the opening to be sure that the kitchen and servers are on their game. Ariana, Stassi, Katie, and Peter are her guinea pigs. Of course, there are computer issues which need to be worked out. Turns out that the printer wasn’t plugged in. The group is really hungry, but the food is taking a long time. That’s kind of how a soft opening goes. The food arrives and they agree that it was worth the wait.
Scene 4 – Peter and Vail never really dated, but they did make out. Peter had lots of lady issues this year. His apartment looks like a dorm room, with gross dishes and junk everywhere. Stassi, Katie, and Kristina bring him his birthday cake and talk about his love life. Peter met a girl, but can’t remember her name. She’s in his phone as “blond chick.” Classy. He calls “blond chick” so he can find out her name. He asks her for her instagram name and she says that it’s her first name, so he asks her to spell it. It’s Sarah. He asks her out and she says that she’s seeing someone. Why did she give out her number then!?
Scene 5 – Other Tom works consistently modeling. He looks up to Tom as a modeling mentor. They run through a series of their poses.
Scene 6 – Jax and Katie never fixed their relationship after Jax tried to break Katie and Other Tom up. We get a really awkward clip of Jax attempting to apologize to Katie, but she isn’t buying it. Jax seems to think that he can behave however he wants, then apologize and it makes everything ok. He blames his behavior on Stassi’s return. Katie calls him out for making excuses. I’m loving Katie now that she’s found her voice!
Scene 7 – Other Tom graduated college and was pre-med. He says that he didn’t have what it takes to be a doctor because he’s afraid of needles. We see Jax taking the guys to get IV’s of vitamins because they’ve been partying too much. Tom starts making noises from the room so that Other Tom thinks that it’s painful. Poor Other Tom. I feel his pain, I don’t do well with needles either.
Scene 8 – Scheana’s life didn’t change much after marrying Shay. She was very concerned about her father’s and Shay’s dance moves, so Lisa arranges for Gleb (Lisa’s Dancing with the Stars partner) to teach them some moves. Ron, Scheana’s dad, and Shay are good sports about it. We get lots of shots of Scheana twerking. Gross.
Scene 9 – Jax is the master of telling people what they want to hear. That’s why he gets so many girls. I’m surprised he can get anyone after this show started airing. He admits that he has sexted the wrong girl before, because he tries to carry on too many conversations at once. Jax is gross. The girls pass around Jax’s phone and read the texts that he has received. Some girl wants to have his babies. Why? Ugh!
Scene 10 – Everyone got along in Miami. Of course, the group went skinny-dipping. This group never passes up an opportunity to get naked. Somehow, only the guys ended up naked this time.
Scene 11 – The girls carved penises from fruit at Scheana’s bachelorette. No words.
Scene 12 – Katie and Stassi used to be inseperable. They check out a fashion truck. It’s like food truck, but for shopping. Pretty cool idea. Stassi loves to shop for jewelry.
Scene 13 – Lisa isn’t planning on retirement soon. She meets with a restaurant consultant to test the staff. She always wants to be sure that Sur is running smoothly. Todd is like a secret diner, who will get the experience that a regular customer gets. He gets a drink at the bar, then is seated at a table. Kristen waits on him and the service is pretty good. When Todd finds a hair on his plate, Kristen gets him a new plate. Todd prepared a binder for Lisa with his evaluation, with 250 suggestions. I agree with Lisa that it is overwhelming. She doesn’t agree with all of his suggestions.
Scene 14 – Other Tom’s life got easier after Scheana and Katie buried the hatchet. After the Hollywood party, the group ends up at someone’s apartment. Scheana doesn’t understand why her friendship with Kristen affects Stassi or Katie. Scheana choses that moment to bash Stassi, but Katie is still on Team Stassi and defends her. It turns into an argument between Other Tom and Katie. When Scheana continues to talk about Stassi, Katie loses it and leaves. Other Tom doesn’t even realize that she left, lol.
Scene 15 – After Scheana’s wedding, the boys serenade Scheana with a song that they wrote for her. Shay wanted to perform it at the wedding, but there wasn’t time. It is so sweet to see Shay singing about Scheana. They really are a cute couple.
And that’s a wrap for Season 3 of Vanderpump Rules.