Dr. Phil’s Real Housewives Exclusive Interview With Kim Richards By Texas Tart
The following is not the exact dialog, it does not include everything that was said, but hopefully will be cohesive enough to follow. I have to admit that I didn’t write down every time Dr. Phil mentioned “in a bar” but it would have been the drinking word game that made everyone horizontal fast. After the news broke that Kim Richards was arrested at a bar, I posted here that she will claim she only had one drink. Maybe a half a million other people were able to predict this too.
Dr. Phil opens his show with a view of the Beverly Hills Hotel in the background saying that Kim Richards’ family has found this hotel to be like a second home and they have spent many Christmas eves there. Kim has rubbed elbows with Hollywood elite. But that was in the past. Now she has gone from VIP to being charged with public intoxication, trespassing, resisting an officer and battery on a police officer. On April 16, 2015 at 2:04 am Kim was arrested at the famed Polo Lounge, where the police said she showed objective signs of alcohol intoxication and they had to drag her out of a bathroom after locking herself inside.
Media clips are shown and several clips from Bravo with everyone in entertainment media talking about her relapse. Then they show Dr. Phil by himself waiting. It’s past the scheduled start. He said there was primping. Clothing changes. Bangs being fluffed. Dr. Phil is still waiting. In walks Kim.
Phil: Are you delaying this for some reason?
Kim: Absolutely not.
Phil: I take what I do seriously.
Phil: You were arrested, you’re a mom. Why did you get arrested?
Kim: I’m a strong person. I have been sober. I haven’t been working a program. My youngest called, having a difficult time [Kimberly] so I went to spend the night with her. I needed to watch the show, to blog the show. The fans are very hard on me. Kimberly went to school the next morning and I was going to watch the show, but I went on Twitter first to see what people were saying. It was horrible. They were calling me names…
Phil: What did they say?
Kim: You’re a ho. You’re a drunk. Calling me all kinds of names. I’m an alcoholic. I’ve said that. I’m tired of being talked about.
Phil: Have you been drunk on the show?
Kim: No, I have not drank on camera.
Phil: What is this? [shows a clip of the Amsterdam dinner from hell]
Phil: Why are you in that kind of exchange?
Kim: I’m acting this way because I’m angry. And everyone told me Lisa Rinna was talking behind my back.
Phil: So you’re not acting this way because your super defensive, because you have something to hide?
Kim: No. I’m angry.
Phil: So you left Kimberly’s
Kim: I left Kimberley’s to pick up Brooke who was coming in from Dubai.
Phil: So what upset you?
Kim: It wasn’t the blog. It wasn’t the blog or the season that upset me. It was my relationship with my sister and my niece that’s been destroyed. [crying] The comments got to me. I couldn’t sleep. I was thinking about the blog. I poured a drink of vodka [holds her fingers to indicate 2″] I haven’t had vodka in over 10 years. Then I thought, what have I done?! [hands over mouth, shocked expression] So I left. It kicked in when I was driving past the Beverly Hills Hotel and I pulled in because this is a familiar place. I put my purse on the table where I always sit. I started talking to some people at a table. I thought I knew them.
Phil: What caused the maitre’d to ask you to leave.
Kim: I don’t know. I don’t remember all of it.
Phil: Did you order a drink when you go there?
Kim: No, the bar was closed. I went over and talked to some people I thought I knew. The waiter wanted me to leave and go back to my table. The waiter mentioned I was trespassing.
Phil: All of this because you had one 2″ drink? Was it in a paint can?
Kim: Just in a glass.
Phil: Let’s talk about common sense. I have one drink. I go talk to people I don’t know and the maitre’d at a BAR asks you to leave at a BAR and then it gets to the point he has to say you need to leave, you’re trespassing. You need to leave the BAR. Were you loud, obnoxious or acting crazy?
Kim: I don’t remember all that! I remember bits and pieces.
Phil: He called the police.
Kim: I went to the bathroom. I was in the stall and the police came in.
Phil asks a lot of details and she claims she was scared. The cops were banging on the door. They grabbed her, etc. She doesn’t remember it all.
Phil: Usually when people are scared they are compliant.
Phil: You never had a drink the hour and a half you were there?
Phil: Shouldn’t you have already processed the alcohol from the one drink by now? The cops said you had slurred speech. Do you remember assaulting the officer?
Kim: I was maybe flailing around, I don’t know.
Phil: You had to be drinking a lot.
Kim: [shakes head no]
Phil: If you’re an alcoholic, then why go to a bar if you’re not getting a drink?
Kim: Because. Because. I was feeling it, so I pulled in so I wouldn’t be on the road. Because that’s a safe place for me.
Phil: You went to a bar.
Kim: That is where I usually go.
Phil: In a bar…
Kim: I sat in the same booth where her mother sat since she was 6 years old.
Phil: IN A BAR
Phil: You didn’t order a drink?
Kim: I’m sorry for my kids and those that were rooting for my sobriety. I feel horrible. I can only pick it up and move on.
Phil: So when you took that drink, it was the first in 3.5 years?
Kim: No. That’s not true. I did have drinks a couple of times the last few months. It was wine.
[clips from the reunion where Kim is chastising everyone for questioning her sobriety]
Kim: I was embarrassed to say at the reunion. The girls [RHOBH cast] didn’t make it easy for me. I had been sober for 3 years….so it was a lie and it wasn’t a lie.
Phil: What do you think of Kyle’s reaction…she’s looking at you out the corner of her eye.
Kim: It’s been a bad year for us. Yolanda came to me, Brandi and Kyle telling me what Lisa Rinna was talking about me.
[crying] [pics of her and Kyle are shown]
Phil: Kyle is the one that revealed you were an alcoholic. Do you resent that?
Kim: Yes. I tried to put it behind me.
[Kingsley media clips about biting Kyle’s daughter, Alexia’s hand]
Phil: You and your sister had a fight about a dog bite. [speculation as why] but it was an accident.
Phil: Are you afraid your sister will see this [interview] and say that’s why she didn’t stand up for you, you were lying all along?
Kim: Kyle texted me after the arrest to see if I was okay. [crying] I haven’t spoken to her, but I’m sure some people are having a field day with this. And I don’t really care.
[clip of TMZ following Kyle on the street, she was on her phone and not responding]
Phil: You DO care what people think. You look at Twitter and let it get to you. People make judgments but just looking at now and not the whole life.
Phil references her fiance` getting shot in the head and killed while talking to her on the phone. And she had to identify his body. This draws the most intense reaction. Phil wonders if she thinks of this when she drinks. She says she thinks of it every day, but not drinking every day. Phil mentions she is a caretaker for an ex-husband who is a Stage 4 cancer patient [Monty].
Phil: When did you know this was a problem?
Kim: When my mom was sick, I was taking care of her and I started drinking a lot at night. I turned into a person I didn’t like. I didn’t want to look at myself in the mirror.
Bravo footage is showing going into commercial and I’m glad to see they included some finger pointing footage. Her children, Brooke Brinson, Kimberly Jackson and Chad Davis join the interview. Not attending is daughter Whitney and son Kingsley. The children were not introduced by name. They’re seated on a couch, horizontally aligned to keep Kim’s focus toward Dr. Phil.
Phil: I’m concerned about your Mom. Did you see her take a drink?
Brooke: No. she wasn’t there when I woke up. She called me the next morning and told me she was driving home, she was in jail last night.
Kimberly found out through friends on social media.
Kim apologizes to her children.
Kimberly: we love you, support you and want you to get the help you need.
Phil: You said your friend that hangs out with you, Brandi [photos of Brandi Glanville] had your back. She’s described to me as someone who does drink. How do y’all feel about this friendship?
Kimberly: From the very beginning [interrupted by Chad]
Chad: Toxic. She’s toxic. [Kim looks shocked] You need to be around people that are supporting your sobriety.
Kim: She’s a good friend. And Yolanda too. [Dr Phil knows Yolanda very well] Brandi doesn’t drink around me unless on the show. They all drink on the show.
Brooke: I personally don’t know Brandi that well, I can see where it makes Mom look bad hanging with her, from the show, but I do not personally know her.
Kim tells the kids she wants to do the right and says a lot of things that I don’t remember, but what struck me was all three of the children have a blank expression. Probably because they’ve heard this song and dance before.
Phil: You can’t handle the heat from the public, the criticisms from the show. Would you walk away from it?
Kim: If I can’t, yes, I will.
Phil: You reading Tweets were the trigger, that shows you can’t handle the heat.
Kim: I haven’t been working a program. I need to exercise.
Phil: Do you trust me?
Kim: [pause, looks away] I do.
[camera goes to the children]
Brooke: I do.
Phil: Something has to change. There are too many red flags. I’ve never seen an alcoholic that gets their story right and you’re no exception. You go up to people you don’t know at the Polo Lounge and refuse to leave, you lock yourself in the bathroom, you attack a cop, that sounds like a drunk.
He references the pain pill. The times she [admitted to] drank. Kim tried to interrupt and he claimed she was doing that to deflect and minimize.
Phil: Come’on you drink.
Kim: Never on the show. Never on the show. I want to make that clear.
Phil: She didn’t drink on the show people! She’s just a slurry belligerent angry woman. I don’t care about the show. You have a lot of anxiety. You are depressed, a caregiver for a stage 4 cancer patient, mother to 4 children, a life history with a lot of wounds. You need help. You were drunk in a bar at 1:30 in the morning and fighting a cop, that is not good mothering! That is meltdown mothering. You need help. You need treatment. I will make it a gift from me to you.
Kim: I actually told the kids I need to go recharge myself, that I didn’t want to go way [crying] 30 days. I want to go close to home. [Kimberly looks so sad]
Brooke: Will you go to a 60 day program?
Kim: Not more than 30. Only if it’s close to home and I have not found a place that meets my needs.
Phil: You can’t make this about demands. I’m interested in one thing, and that’s your long term health and well being. Will you go?
Kim: No. Has to be close to home.
[Brooke has a very dissatisfied expression, her siblings have a stone face]
Phil: It’s about meeting your demands
Kim: I don’t want to miss my daughters wedding.
[Brooke is already married. She had a ceremony featured on RHOBH. The upcoming wedding will be a more elaborate full scale wedding than the quickie they had so it could be on Bravo – I mean, so her father Monty could be there.]
Phil: You just need to say you trust the process and trust me.
Kim: Trust is a hard for me. [crying]
Kimberly: I don’t want you to go back home – there is so much going on at home [Kim interrupts]
Kim: Is this an intervention?!
Kim: I have to go home!
Chad: It’s just surrendering and not having to worry about that, you know.
Kim: I just want to stop, I’m done [she’s talking about the interview]
Phil: You’ve controlled this and it’s not really worked for you. I’m asking you to take a leap of faith and trust your family.
Kim: Who have I been able to trust? Who?
Phil: Why, don’t you trust me right now?
Kim: Okay, I trust you. [crying]
Phil: I’ve arranged a program for you that’s right down the street. [Kim interrupts]
Kim: I have a lot of anxiety [abruptly walks out of the room]
Dr. Phil in a talking head explains why he wanted Kim to agree 100% about rehab before he gave her information on the facility. Kim is very controlling and like many addicts she is a deflector, with her I knew it would be critical to get all her excuses out of the way. We knew of all of Kim’s concerns ahead of time, so all she had to do is accept.
We hear audio of Kim going down the hallway taking off her mic and saying you can forget this whole thing, I’m done. XXXX him. [Which I can only assume is a profanity meant for Dr. Phil] I’m leaving. He totally put me on the spot in front of all those people. [What in the world did she expect? She claimed to be a long time viewer of Dr. Phil?]
Dr. Phil sends Brooke to try to talk her mom into returning. Brooke enters the hotel room Kim has retreated to. Kim is sitting facing a brunette woman, whos face is blurred. It could be Kim’s makeup artist. Bless her. The room has a lot of clothing and bags, notably a “Kyle” store shopping bag. Kim starts moving and somewhat pacing back and forth, goes out on the balcony where there are a couple of people with their faces are blurred. I’m not seeing anyone I would recognize as a relative and I’ll note that I never saw her sister Kathy Hilton in any of these scenes with the camera following Kim. Here’s the dialog:
Kim: I’m done with you!
Kim: 100% I am NOT going back in there.
Kim: Stop it. You are giving me tons of anxiety. He [Dr. Phil] was being rude.
Brooke: He was not being rude.
Kim: I’m not going back in there.
Brooke: It’s by the beach, down the street. Come’on!
Kim: I don’t like secrets. GET OUT!
[Camera is back outside of the room, so we just have audio now.]
Kim: I’m done discussing it. I’m not going back in that room.
Brooke: This is not what we wanted….that was not the goal of coming here. He said its’right down the street, why do you have to be so xxxxx picky? Just go get the help you need.
Kim: I don’t … I can’t.
Arguing continues. I faintly hear other voices which might be the other two children.
Kim: …but you guys don’t see me every day….
Chad: Yeah, but you haven’t been sober.
Kim: Yeah, but…Chad…
Chad: I live with you! I’m not saying you’re drinking, but you take pills, you smoke pot.
Kim: Every once and a while.
A screen graphic says 20 minutes later; Dr. Phil knocks on the door to say goodbye. She opens the door wearing all white and walks into the hall. Seems considerably refreshed and calmer and has a sweet voice. What she says seems so rehearsed. No way it was only 20 minutes from the time she was arguing with her children.
Kim tells Dr. Phil that she appreciates and respects him. She just needs time to digest it. She has tons of anxiety going somewhere she doesn’t know. Dr. Phil asks to see the kids and they walk out into the hall. He tells them he’s sorry this didn’t work out. I told you what you need to do. I think you guys agree [the kids nod]. Kim notes her kids trust Dr. Phil and says “I trust you.” Dr. Phil says “Don’t cheat yourself… and don’t cheat your kids.”
Brooke looks resigned to knowing there’s still an uphill battle and hell to pay for this….or maybe I’m reading way too much into her facial expressions. Kimberly is the quickest to smile, I’m pretty sure she is a people pleaser. I think Chad is Switzerland to some degree with his sisters. I have the feeling that he’s taken a lot of heat and he refrains from saying much. He comes across looking either stern or disgusted.
Phil in a talking head: She refused treatment, but after sleeping on it, she accepted treatment and then she went back and forth with us, wanting special arrangements, private room, etc. In the last few days, it’s reported she checked herself in. We hope that’s true. Dr. Phil thanks Malibu Beach Sober Living and they show pics of how nice it is there. I hope Kim will stay long enough to get the help she needs.
Kim Richards wiki page http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kim_Richards
Dr. Phil’s interview clips http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/2408/
Dr. Phil’s 7 steps in breaking addiction http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/173
Malibu Beach Sober Living http://www.malibubeachsoberliving.org/
You can watch the video here:
Top 10 Things I Learned from
Dr. Phil’s Interview with Kim Richards
|10.||Even with all those years of being an actress, it’s still hard for Kim to squeeze out tears on cue.#CrocodileTears #ActingLessonsMayHelp|
|9.||It’s All About the Size of the Glass…On the night she was arrested, Kim admitted to drinking about 2 inches of vodka – Dr. Phil aptly asked if it was from a paint can since the amount of time from when she drank it to when she was still slurring her speech, acting all wonky, and getting arrested was over 2 hours which was long enough for her to be sobering up. I’m thinking it was probably a trash can.|
|8.||Once a diva – Always a Diva…Kim made Dr. Phil wait for her for quite a while before the interview and he was so not happy about it. She then proceeded to lie to his face about it and tell him she had been ready since her arrival at 10:00 AM. I’m not even going to go into her list of demands for a rehab facility.|
|7.||Kim’s son, Chad (who lives with her), calls Brandi “toxic”…And he should know, no?|
|6.||Evidently, alcoholics can drink wine and still be sober!Drinking wine evidently doesn’t count against Kim Richard’s brand of sobriety. Kim admitted to drinking wine a few times – but didn’t want to admit it on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Reunion Show because she was askeered of the big bad women from RHOBH. Personally, I think Kim should create and sell perfume called, “My Sobriety” – Which advertises that it’s comprised of fruity notes of pomegranate and passion fruit but is actually just 100% merlot. That way, if anyone smells wine on her – She can just say it’s her new perfume. It would be very convenient…|
|5.||Kim actually thinks people look up to her…Ummm yeah… I guess those who are shorter than Kim’s 5’1” frame and the high horse she rides on may have to physically look up to her… Okay…|
|4.||Kim doesn’t blog because we, the viewers, are meanie weenies.It’s true… I am… But at least I own it.|
|3.||Kim insists that she never drank on the show this season on camera.Operative words: “on the show,” “this season” and “on camera.”|
|2.||No really, it’s perfectly acceptable for alcoholics to go to a bar when they’re relapsing.In Kim’s world – When you’re driving after you’ve been drinking (Pause and take that part in for a moment…) and you’re a recovering alcoholic who never struggles with her sobriety – It’s perfectly reasonable to go to a bar at 1:30 AM… You know… and NOT order a drink. Kim still asserts that she only drank 2 inches of vodka all night. However, she was evidently drunk enough to be bounced out of a bar… That she and her family have been frequenting all her life… By the police… Who arrested her… And whom she kicked… Puhleeze.|
|1.||No matter how you look at it – Kim is a lying liar who lies. She even lies about lying.Evidently, we are to blame for her drinking – Kim blames twitter, tweeters, bloggers, viewers, Bravo, the stuff with Kingsley, Brooke’s wedding, her dying ex-husband, and everyone else but herself for her drinking. She even stormed off the set and said “Fuck him” referring to Dr. Phil about how he put her on the spot during her interview – Ummm…. Duh… That’s what he does during every single interview…lol… She just demonstrated that she must have never really watched his show like she insisted she had – Unless of course she watched it while she was in the same “fog” that seemed to surround her on the night she was arrested thus conveniently clouding her memory.But don’t we ALL know – It’s really ALL Kyle’s fault?|
In all seriousness, Kim is an alcoholic. According to her son, she also takes pills and smokes pot (Wow, she could have had some “space cake” in Amsterdam after all, no?). She is an addict in need of interventions (Just don’t use that word around her).
The bottom line is this – Even if Kim says she loves turtles while in a smoky fog of pot, if she spills pills all over a hotel bathroom floor and sits on the floor to pick them up, or if she plays with previously used tissues left in the back seat of a limousine while in a drunken stupor – I truly hope Kim will get and accept the type of help that she so desperately needs. I hope her kids do, too – They’ve had to deal with this their whole lives… Honestly, it’s almost put me over the edge and I’ve only had to watch it on TV. But, please know, that if I ever do become an alcoholic… I’ll be sure to blame Kyle!
My spidey senses are telling me that we just may have a Kim and Kyle reconciliation show mediated by none other than Dr. Phil in the not-so-distant future. Fingers crossed…lol. I wonder how much Kim got paid for this interview… Color me cynical.
Real Housewives of New York City
“The Art of Being a Cougar” – S7E4
Remember Last Week…
In a lame high school attempt of playing “Who Do You Like Better?” Ramona tried to make the women pledge their undying loyalty during BrunchGate 2015™®©… Unfortunately for Ramona, the women staying with LuAnn (Kristen, Heather and Carole) chose to attend both brunches but first went to Bethenny’s. They wanted to see the “House that Skinny Girl Built” and their loyalty bought them some Skinny Girl swag when they left (including blenders) – The remaining prisoners who were staying at Ramona’s house (Sonja and Dorinda) were forced at gunpoint to go to brunch at a restaurant with Ramona… There they waited… and waited… and waited…
Later on, Dorinda and “What’s His Name” (John) went on a hot daytime date and he was castrated by Dorinda for taking a business phone call… But don’t go feeling too sorry for him, because he arrived sans Dorinda at a well-known singles pick-up joint where Cougars pounce on easy young prey – Just ask Sonja, LuAnn, Ramona, Carole, Bethenny, and… Wait for it… Wait for it… Krazy “Satchels of Gold” Kelly. Yikes! Bethenny chides “slithery” LuAnn for not giving her a girl’s girl heads up on Kelly’s attendance and surprisingly LuAnn apologized and together they returned to the Cougars. The Pack began pouncing on some very young aspiring gazelles who were longing to be photographed for National Geographic and who were looking for free drinks, drooling women, and airtime on a reality show.
Heather and Carole are going for a walk. Carole tells Heather she’s dating Adam (29 years old), the young chef she met at LuAnn’s. On Halloween, they went to a club owned by one of Carole’s friends. She had a couple of tequilas and then “someone” gave Carole a gummy bear… Which she actually ate… Are you kidding me? Who does that? Haven’t we ALL learned not to eat crap like that at a club? Carole was “tripping” her head off and then she promptly got sick in the back of a petty cab with young Adam holding her hair back. She laughs it off as making her look vulnerable and it worked, cuz Adam didn’t go home. She has not told LuAnn yet because she knows that he dated LuAnn’s niece.
Oh goodie – It Bethenny’s birthday party. You may remember how wonky Bethenny generally is about her birthday – Probably because she shares it with her mother whom she loves, oh so much – Who knows? She puts on a black gladiator pantsuit with silver metal accents on the bodice. Or I guess it could be a dominatrix outfit, I’m not sure. It makes a strong statement… I’m just not sure what that statement is… It isn’t, “I’m cute, cuddly and approachable” that’s for sure. But she does look pretty – In a sweet, S & M kind of way.
It makes all the sense in the world to me that she wanted it to be a small, intimate gathering of safe and sane people without a lot of drama in light of her current lifestyle situation. I’m guessing Bravo wanted to film so she needed to invite some of her coworkers. Bethenny invited Sonja, Ramona and LuAnn – All of whom she knows quite well. Since Bethenny had a great conversation with Carole the night before when they went to Boutique, she ended up extending a last minute invitation to her. It seems like she asked Carole if she wanted to also bring her friend (Heather) – So she was there, too. Neither Dorinda nor Kristen were invited – Seemingly because Bethenny doesn’t know them very well and neither were with the group the night before at Boutique (the pick-up bar)…
Frederick (Bethenny’s realtor from Million Dollar Listing) and his husband arrive at the venue… Sonja brings young (24 year old) Dominic that she met the previous night at Boutique… Dominic brings Matt (his equally young roommate)… Bethenny is surprised because she doesn’t think that +1s are generally supposed to invite other guests to an intimate dinner party.
It’s hilarious because Carole tries hard to make small talk with the youngsters. Carole used to have a rule that she didn’t like to date anyone who was born before the bicentennial – But I guess that rule was modified to accommodate the chef. Sonja’s guys are models (of course they are) and Carole tries to talk to them about Jordache jeans (Way before their time)… They, of course, have never heard of them and conclude that she must be mispronouncing the name of the jeans. In her TH, Carole indignantly says that she’s not mispronouncing it – And she would know because she was a Jordache fit model.
LuAnn intentionally pays Sonja a boomerang compliment that she is a “man magnet.” Sonja doesn’t disappoint and quickly says, “You’re the man magnet.” LuAnn was very pleased that Sonja returned the compliment. For whatever reason, the guys are flocking around the cougars like sheep…Baaaah… Baaah… Everyone seems to be enjoying every minute of it.
It was humorous to me, because there was a lot of talk about seating assignments – And yet what ended up happening was that Heather was seated on Bethenny’s right and Ramona sat on her left. That struck me as very funny for some reason since she barely knew Heather and was recently in a heated fight with Ramona. But Bethenny looks great and seems to be in a happy place… Toasts are made… Happy Birthday! Clink, clink!
The next day, Kristen calls Heather on the phone because she wants to make plans to do something with her. She asks her about what she did the night before and she learns about Bethenny’s party. Kristen concludes that she was the only one from the group that was not invited and she wanted to know what Bethenny’s beef was with her that would cause her not to invite her. Heather tells her that while she didn’t ask that particular question, she did notice that Kristen wasn’t there and that she was missed. Heather also explained that Dorinda wasn’t invited either.
In her TH, Kristen really didn’t make that big of a deal about it. She only said that it’s a bummer when you’re not invited to something but then she also said that maybe it was a win/win since she also didn’t have to buy her a birthday gift. Do we really expect birthday gifts from people we don’t know? Kristen did ask the person who helps her around the house about the situation – And she said that she wouldn’t worry about it.
We transition to Dorinda’s house. Dorinda has made a dental appointment for her adult daughter, Hannah. They banter back and forth at each other and Hannah tells her Mom that she should keep in mind that she will be deciding where she will go when she’s old and has dementia. Such a lovely thought, no? If I had a daughter like that – I’d be setting up a trust and accompanying legal documents to ensure I’m taken care of in the manner I want. I’m sure she’s perfectly lovely but so far she’s coming across as a bratty, entitled, bedazzled itch with a “b.”
Dorinda tells us that she loves “What’s His Name” (John) very much but that he and her daughter don’t have any kind of relationship at all. She keeps the two relationships very separate. “What’s His Name” never sleeps at her house. It doesn’t seem like Hannah likes “What’s His Name” very much – This may be the one and only subject on which Hannah and I will ever agree. Hannah calls her Mom “a chubby chaser” and tells her that she will see “a fat guy with a Yorkshire terrier” and that Dorinda will think that he’s hot. Don’t worry, Hannah is quick to tell her Mom that he’s, “Fudgie, the whale.” What a nice daughter. At the end of this short segment, Dorinda remarked that their dog was being “spastic.” Hannah didn’t know the meaning of the word… lol.
Ramona is footloose and fancy free walking her dog, Coco. Mario used to take up so much of her time that suddenly Ramona has all of this free time now. She walks Coco right into a sports bar. Oh wow, she’s now an investor in the Sports Bar. She’s meeting with Peter who is surprised she brought her dog inside the bar. Ramona said she didn’t bring Coco’s papers. Evidently, they’re going to renovate the bar.
Ramona quickly flirted her way out of the hot water about her dog and asked if they were allowed to dance in the bar area. Peter told her only if she danced ON the bar. Ramona has grandiose ideas on how to make the bar “Downtown Chic.” Peter thinks he probably will need to start dressing more “hip.” After giving him the once over, Ramona assures him he’s just fine the way he is (twinkle, twinkle… flirt, flirt…). Ramona suggests that he text her even though he knows she won’t respond for 7 hours. She coyly says that she receives lots of texts. Ramona is enjoying her freedom…lol. Good for her!
Carole and Adam are at Spin New York playing ping pong… Carole asks Adam how long he’s been playing ping pong and he tells her since he was 10. She jokingly responds with something like, “Oh, so for a couple of years, then…” lol… That was hilarious… Carole thinks she and Adam definitely have chemistry – I bet if she looked in his locker at school she’d find out they also have Algebra 2 (I know, wrong use of the word “too” but I couldn’t resist…lol)… Carole doesn’t think LuAnn is going to mind one bit when she finds out that she’s been dating Adam… Who here believes that? Yeah, I don’t think Carole does either – Otherwise she would have already told LuAnn. Carole and Adam ride off into the sunset down the streets of New York with Carole actually sitting on the handlebars of Adam’s bicycle. Seriously… His bicycle…
Yay – It’s another date night with Dorinda and “What’s His Name” (John). Dorinda asks him if he wants to stay at her house that night because Hannah won’t be home. He seems very excited about that prospect. Then Dorinda gets flippy about wanting to order her own food (and she should) even though “What’s His Name” usually orders what he wants because he knows he will be the one who ends up eating her meal anyway… They talk about going into business together. Rut roh… Red flags fly up all over the place. For some inexplicable reason, “What’s His Name” decides to point out to Dorinda that Hannah is sometimes not happy with Dorinda period – and that it doesn’t have anything to do with him. Dorinda tells him to worry about his own life.
They get into a drawn out discussion about who is ranked #1 and #2 of importance in Dorinda’s life. Hannah will always be Dorinda’s #1 – Even when/if she gets married again – Don’t we all know that? Dorinda is not happy with this discussion and you can almost see the steam coming out of her ears. She’s done eating – Although according to John she hasn’t even touched her food.
There’s uncomfortable silence and Dorinda is fuming. John suggests that she have another cocktail. She wonders what else is there to do when he’s just sitting there. He flippantly suggests that she call her daughter. Dorinda itchly with a “b” replies, “If you bring up my f**king daughter again I’ll gonna f**king rip you a new asshole, get it? Back that s**t up and you back it up quick. Got it?” Whoa… She does know this is being filmed, right? I mean – Bravo’s not using hidden cameras now or anything… Jinkies!
Okay… and this is the part that truly makes my skin crawl… He tries to “charm” (cough, cough) his way out of this… Trying to take her hand… Look into her eyes, etc… Ack.. gag…gag… Is this guy for real? There just isn’t enough dry cleaning in the world to make me deal with the likes of him… Ugh… Okay, to close this out… He asks her, “Are we good?” No you freakin’ gooberhead… You’re NOT good… You’re not even marginally okay – And it has NOTHING to do with your looks. You ooze sleaziness out of every pore of your being. You might want to have a doctor check that out… Dorinda just wants to get her stuff out of his car. Awww, Hannah will be so disappointed they didn’t have a sleepover…lol.
Okay, in the 30 second fake out commercial break thingie – Bethenny is at her birthday party and is insisting that everyone physically get up on the dinner table and perform their very best dance moves… ON THE DINNER TABLE. Who does this at a place like this? Oh yeah, people who think they own the joint do things like this… Wisely, they decide to just do their smooth dancing moves on their chairs because they didn’t want the table to break. Wow. Just wow.
Heather invited Carole, Dorinda and Bethenny out to dinner at a place called “Cherry.” Dorinda is the first to arrive and she tells us that she hopes her time with Bethenny goes better than it did at LuAnn’s. Bethenny arrives only moments later and they both comment on the importance of being timely. Bethenny points out that actually Dorinda was ahead of schedule. They instantly bond like childhood friends over an 80% sample sale about which Dorinda tells Bethenny. Bethenny tries to input her information into Dorinda’s ancient cell phone (I’m sure it was just a tin can with a string). Dorinda confesses that she still has a rotary phone and a fax machine at home. She uses things until they break. There’s nothing wrong with that – Unless of course, the rotary phone NEVER EVER breaks…lol.
After Carole and Heather arrive, the conversation goes to the fact they all saw Dorinda’s boyfriend the other night at Boutique (the singles hook-up bar). Dorinda tried to explain away John’s actions but we all know it’s highly likely that he’s just scum. She says he knows the owner and he was there to have a quick dinner. Right. There was some excessive talk about entrances and about how Dorinda wishes he would think more about how his actions reflect on her. Yeah, or how about just not going there without his girlfriend might be a good first step, no? They talk about John and Hannah’s non-existent relationship and people give Dorinda their opinions but who cares because I think John is on his way out of the scene… I mean, one can only hope, right?
The conversation turns to how both Carole and Dorinda are widows and that they refer to their husbands as their “late husband.” Bethenny decides that it makes them sound too old and that they should really remarket “widowry.” In her TH, Carole was amused that Bethenny was interested in rebranding death – But that she doesn’t think there’s any money in it though… This was clearly significant shade towards Bethenny… Oh snap!
Carole tells the women how when her husband died that the urn was interred at a church that the family had been a part of for generations. A few months ago, Carole received word that the church is selling the land and that the urn has been traveling around to different churches in England because they didn’t know what to do with it (and probably several others). Fortunately, the urn is now safely at Carole’s friend’s house. I believe we saw a preview of Carole sitting in the back of a car with an urn next to her in the 1st episode where they showed previews for the entire season. Bethenny refers to this as the “Sisterhood of the traveling ashes.”
Heather decides to tell Bethenny that Kristen’s feelings were hurt because she wasn’t invited to Bethenny’s bodacious birthday bash (I know, the 70s called and they want their word back…lol). Bethenny, like the grown-up juvenile she is, rolls her eyes and pretends to fall asleep and asks Heather to wake her up when it’s over because she just can’t believe that someone she doesn’t even know is cranky that she wasn’t invited to her birthday party. She thinks it’s absolutely ridiculous…
In her TH, Bethenny says, “We are at Cherry – But I’m not going to sugarcoat this thing.” Bethenny admits that she can be harsh and abrasive but that she’s also recently had a tough couple of years. She concedes, “So maybe I don’t work that well with others.” LOL… Captain Understatement!
Heather asks her if she wants to know why Kristen’s feelings were hurt and Bethenny really doesn’t want to hear anything more about it and suggests that Heather tell Dorinda about it if she’d like. I’m guessing that Kristen may have thrown out her Skinny Girl Blender after seeing this episode. Although to be fair, Heather is making a much bigger deal about it than Kristen seemed to – Sure, Kristen wondered why she wasn’t invited – But it really didn’t go much further than that.
At the risk of her head being guillotined, Dorinda admitted that she, too, was hurt for a minute when she learned that she wasn’t invited to the party. Bethenny looked at Dorinda incredulously and responded that she didn’t even know her. Dorinda stuck up for herself and insisted that it was okay for her to have those feelings but Bethenny disagreed. Isn’t it nice that Bethenny can tell people what they can feel and what they cannot feel? What WOULD we do without her?
There was talk about Bethenny knowing Josh (Kristen’s husband) – and Bethenny clarified that she thinks she has seen Josh maybe 5 times over the course of 15 – 20 years… Carole and Heather seem to have been under the impression that she knew him much better than that. Bethenny points out that if she knew him better than that – Then why wouldn’t she have met Kristen way before this?
OMG… I cannot believe that Bethenny has been put in the position of having to explain her birthday bash invitation process. Wow. Bethenny says that she invited Carole the night before after having a great conversation with her at Boutique. Bethenny told Carole that she could also bring “her friend” (Heather). Heather straight out asks Bethenny if she was Carole’s +1 and Bethenny honestly answers, “Kind of, yeah…” Heather bellyaches about how she had to cancel all her plans in order to attend the birthday bash… Bethenny said that if Kristen told her to her face that she was hurt about not being invited – That Bethenny would tell her that she thinks it’s ridiculous because she doesn’t even know her.
Heather tenderly suggests to Bethenny that instead of telling Kristen that it’s ridiculous for her to feel that way – That perhaps she could say something like, “I’m sorry that I hurt you and I would like to get to know you better.” Yes, because, isn’t that what Heather did her first season when the ONLY person she didn’t invite on her business trip to England for Yummy Tummy was Ramona? Sit yourself down, Heather.
In her TH, Heather wonders where Bethenny’s sensitivity chip is and then says, “What a B**ch.” Stars99 giggled. This is so going to be a great season… lol.
Carole thinks Bethenny is being rude. Heather just can’t get over being Carole’s +1 and says so – Bethenny gently reminds Heather that Bethenny wasn’t the one who said it – That Heather herself said it. Bethenny just wants to return to the death and ashes conversation, please.
Carole starts telling the other housewives that she’s dating and practically living with the young chef Adam – Evidently, she finally tells LuAnn about it and she doesn’t take it as well as Carole had hoped she would. The girls talk about “slip ups” which I think means cheating… Someone’s hands are all over Sonja – but I’ll let that unfold in next week’s show. Oh, and surprise! Sonja has a fashion line – But she can’t talk about it yet. Sonja thinks the only person in the room that doesn’t lie is her… Okay, you just have to giggle about that one… Because we know Sonja doesn’t have to lie because she’s created her own alternate reality upon which we are merely players, right? Lol.
Well, that’s it for this week – It was painless, yes? I’m really enjoying recapping RHONYC – They’re all manageably insane… lol… Hope to see you next week… Happy Trails.