Real Housewives of New York City
“Mind Your Own Business” – S7E5
Remember Last Week…
Why is Carole is seemingly trying to pretend she’s not an adult? In between playing ping pong with her young chef boy toy and riding home down the streets of New York on the handle bars of his bicycle, she boasted to Heather about how she totally tripped out after eating a “funny” gummy bear she was handed by someone in a nightclub. What the heck has happened to Carole this season? Where has the smart, witty, kewl chick gone? Come back! Come back!
Heather is the self-appointed “Let’s Bring Bethenny Down A Notch” police when she tried to blast her about how Kristen’s feelings were hurt because Bethenny didn’t invite her to her bodacious birthday bash. However, the joke was ultimately on Heather because her interrogation also revealed that Heather wasn’t actually an invited guest either but instead was merely Carole’s +1. Ouch! In her talking head (TH) interview, when Heather referred to Bethenny she said, “What a Bitch!”
And then there was “What’s His Name” (John) who gives me a raging case of the creepies every single time I see him. I understand that Dorinda likes the free dry cleaning that is promised when you date him – But come the heck on… They had a very awkward dinner wherein Dorinda looks lovingly into his eyes and says, “If you bring up my f**king daughter again I’ll f**king rip you a new asshole, get it? Back that s**t up and you back it up quick. Got it?” Ahhh…. Love, true love… Lol…
Sonja arrives at a restaurant to meet Bethenny who immediately gets off her business call – I really love that. Bethenny has always liked Sonja. It’s probably because Sonja is very entertaining. Sonja also unabashedly talks about sex. Before joining this season, I’m sure Bethenny heard the stories about Sonja’s precarious financial situation. They talk a little about Sonja’s finances and her $7 million dollar judgment. Sonja explains that when you file a “Chapter 11” that “everyone” is waiting for your money. Ummm… Yes… The entity you call “Everyone” are your creditors to whom you owe money. Please don’t act like they’re miscellaneous people looking for a handout. I know we’ve gone back and forth ad nauseum about the validity of this judgment against Sonja… I must admit that I’m shocked, but it seems like Sonja may be able to hang onto her current home… It seems really important to her because of her daughter… Oh… and because the “Morgan” name is attached to it, of course….Timing is everything when a Chapter 11 is involved… Perhaps timing is also the reason her business ventures have not come to fruition… yet. Or perhaps Sonja is just as delusional as she appears.
We then enter the fuzzy world of Sonja’s delusions… With a straight face, she explains to Bethenny that she’s an international brand and that she has international businesses. As Sonja weaves her web of delusion, Bethenny is honestly trying to figure out what the heck she’s saying. Sonja talks about having an “upscale trunk show” – like at Barneys – Or she could have a gallery… Bethenny does not know what the heck she’s talking about and suggests that she picks one product on which to focus and do that one product really, really well.
Sonja says that she’s a “Luxury Fashion Lifestyle Brand” – Bethenny says those words don’t mean anything to her – It doesn’t accurately describe her business. After Sonja says some more things, Bethenny was able to quickly synthesize Sonja’s fuzzy vision into two succinct, descriptive words, “Accessible luxury.” Whew… Take that idea to the bank, Sonja! Bethenny wants Sonja to simplify things. Sonja is happy that someone is supporting her without criticizing her.
I know some of you have said that Sonja’s used, “Affordable Luxury” in the past – However I don’t find much that’s affordable on Sonja’s website (http://www.sonjamorgannewyork.com/). The least expensive item (other than swimwear) is “Tuxedo Shorts” for $175. Who pays $175 for a pair of shorts? It is halfway into spring and these items are still not even available to buy – But you can put them on your “wish list.” This luxury is neither “accessible” nor “affordable.” Puhleeze…
The discussion somehow goes downhill as they talk about how sometimes they just want to drink a lot… And get pounded… I’m just sure they’re just talking about getting a really hard massage… Aren’t they? Sonja says she has a rule that she doesn’t “swallow” unless he has a black card. So basically, you’re saying you’re performing sexual acts for money? So… I ask you… Ho or no? It gives “Sonja in the City” a whole new meaning… I’m hoping Sonja was just being playful and witty…Bethenny thinks it’s a good policy. Sonja says it opens a lot of doors and a lot of throats. I gag a little in mine. No pun intended. Well, maybe… a little…
Dorinda and LuAnn are getting pedicures. LuAnn is wearing her, “these boots are made for walking…” boots. LuAnn brings up how John showed up at the pick-up place during “Girl’s Night Out.” Dorinda explains that when she met John he had a lot of women hanging around. Wow…The mere mention of his name made the raging case of the creepies come back… Dorinda knows that whenever there are vaginas involved that there could be “slip ups.” Dorinda doesn’t like slip ups.
Awww… How naïvely cute – Dorinda actually thinks she’s put an end to John and his girlfriends – But don’t we know better? That is, if you buy at all into the premise that these two are actually dating and their relationship is real. I just want to – As my Mom used to say, “Shake some sense” into her. I guess we wouldn’t say that nowadays… Perhaps we’d say something like, “Plug in her flash drive…” “Get her an app for that…” “Reboot her hard drive.” I mean John and Dorinda have zero chemistry… He’s so danged creepy and acts like such a jerk… He also brings out the jerk in her… There are so many nicer, more wonderful fish in the sea… I just wish Dorinda would go fishing.
Dorinda explains how the world becomes scarier when someone you love passes away – That it makes you vulnerable and afraid in some ways. She has found that she approaches relationships differently now than she has in the past. She has lost 2 significant men in her life – One through divorce; the other thru death. Both involve significant amounts of grief. Both experiences can’t help but change you forever. I know many of us are not especially Dorinda fans – But at this point, I’m still trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. She is brash and would surely hurt my feelings if we were friends – But I saw the way she was “there” for Ramona when she really needed her. Tonight she tried to be peacemaker between Ramona and Sonja. What you see is what you get – And I can really appreciate that about her. I just wish she picked out her boyfriends a little better.
Carole meets Kristen for drinks and oysters – Oh, she must be meeting her young stud, Adam later… Aphrodisiacs are always helpful, no? Carole jokingly tells Kristen that she’s practically living with Adam. In her TH, Kristen tells us she thinks the age difference is perfect for Carole – And that as long as he’s legal – Kristen doesn’t want to know anything more. Carole lets Kristen know that she hasn’t had the opportunity to tell LuAnn about their dating situation yet… Right… But she seems to have time to tell everyone else… If only we had the technology to write down a quick thought or two and instantly transmit it to someone else… If only… Kristen thinks it’s all going to get complicated fast if Carole doesn’t tell LuAnn soon…
Ramona visits Sonja at her house. Sonja tells us that even though their relationship sometimes fluctuates – That she will always be there whenever Ramona needs her. I blinked and they start talking about some healthy green juice – Which Ramona samples but thinks it has too many ingredients. Fortunately, Ramona brought some Pinot Grigio that she quickly uses as a chaser. Hey, if you combined the Pinot Grigio WITH the healthy green juice – You would have “Pinot Green-eo”… I smell a new product opportunity for Sonja… Wink… wink!
Sonja knows this is Ramona’s first birthday without Mario and so she wants to invite her on a Bravo-paid trip to Atlantic City. She promises Ramona that they will do anything she wants. Ramona wants to invite all the women. Sonja balks at that but Ramona suggests that Sonja should just stay away from talking about her businesses with the others. Sonja thinks the other women pick on her about her businesses. Ramona wants to play some blackjack – Sonja says she does, too because she just wants to throw some dice. Ummm… No Sonja, that’s not blackjack. But you can be sure that there will be some Turtle Time!!
Meanwhile, Dorinda tells Hannah that she is throwing a cocktail party because she wants an opportunity to meet everyone’s significant others. Oh man… I’m starting to get the creepies again… Dorinda starts whining about Bethenny’s RSVP text. Dorinda writes paragraph texts so anything less than 5,000 words probably seems like some sort of a slight. Bethenny texted, “Can’t come – Away!” Hannah wants to know if Bethenny’s text ended with a period or an exclamation mark… Evidently, punctuation is EVERYTHING in text messages. Whew… We learn it was an exclamation mark – So it’s all okay. I’d hate to think if Bethenny ended the text with a period… However, I must admit the grammarian that lives deep inside me did a little happy dance that we’re talking about punctuation…
Hannah calls “What’s His Name” (John) annoying… Wow… Understatement of the year… Dorinda seems to be a little worried about what John is going to say and how he is going to act. Hannah tells her Mom that she can’t control other people or their behavior – But that you can only control yourself… Drat… I have nothing snarky to say about that…lol.
Kristen is in search of a storyline. She started a fashion blog and insists that she has no ghostwriter but she does have an intern to help her out with the blog (http://www.kristencarrolltaekman.com/). It’s called “Last Night’s Look” – And she tells us that she is not getting paid for it nor is it paying her bills. It’s something that she wants to do for herself. I think it’s a great idea – She needs to bat to her strengths and modeling is one of her strengths – Cuz she’s Preeeeeety. Let’s not talk about how she changed clothes in public and ran across the street swishing her skirt in such a way that I’m sure she flashed her photographer and all of New York.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages… It’s time for the start of Sonja’s Spectacular Three-Ring Circus! As Bethenny and her assistant walk into the building for Sonja’s business presentation, Bethenny tells her assistant to be open-minded about it. I think Bethenny is protective of Sonja and jumped at the chance to attend her circus. .
Sonja is looking at the poster board layouts on her wall depicting her summer fashion collection. Sonja remarks that leopard is her neutral color. I’ll just let you ponder that for a while…
Bethenny meets Sonja’s circus performers (team) which is comprised of her: CFO, CEO, Marketing Director, Head of Branding, and various Designers… I look around for other people to be in attendance for the presentation, but no… This is evidently a command performance of this circus act.
Bethenny wonders who everyone is and what they do… As they tell her – she asks them basic questions that they answer very superficially… Sonja worked towards a bachelor’s degree in marketing at the Fashion Institute of Technology (FIT). Sonja says she was a model in Italy and in France (well, at least that’s what her bio says).
Bethenny finds out they’re planning for a Summer 2015 launch so she asks where the collection will be sold. She was told that they still need to have a buyer’s meeting but she was assured they’ve been working on this for three whole months (Insert gratuitous eye roll here). Bethenny tells us in her TH that she knows that you can’t just pull a clothing line out of your ass in a couple of months. She notices a “Spring 2015 – Launch Date” sign (earlier it was Summer… I’m so confused)… As the circus performers try to confound her with feats of stupidity, Bethenny asks what store is going to carry her collection as a start.
Sonja twirls some fire and says they have several options. Bethenny asks if they already have orders… She is told by a lion tamer they can’t tell her because they’re in negotiations right now…
Bethenny says, “You can’t say that you’re launching something in 2015 if you don’t have any orders.” The circus contortionist who looks like she’s 16-years-old smugly asks Bethenny if she has been in the apparel business before – Fully expecting to silence her. Well, actually, yes…Yes she has… Bethenny clues in the clueless to her shapewear line and her loungewear line… I can’t help but giggle. It was such a snarky set-up question…
The lion tamer condescendingly asks Bethenny if she knows anything about the process and how orders work… Bethenny unflinchingly responds that she knows that if they are planning to launch in Spring 2015 that at this point they would be able to tell her the name of the retailer. In her TH, Sonja says she is totally kewl with Bethenny asking these questions because she has a good reason to – Bethenny wants to make sure Sonja is going down the right path. I’m afraid these circus performers are taking Sonja and what little money she has for one heck of a ride… Stars99 starts to inexplicably sing, “Send in the clowns… There ought to be clowns… Don’t worry – They’re here.”
Sonja has believed the promises of a lot of clowns over the course of her life. Broken promises and investors suddenly backing out have wreaked havoc in her life and left her with toaster oven boxes with nothing to toast. I’m surprised she’s still so trusting of circus performers in sparkly costumes. Bethenny, after trying to make sense out of all the nonsense says in her TH, “I forgot I took a hit of acid before I came into this meeting – Which explains all of this…” Bethenny leaves to go pick up her daughter and her sanity. Sonja inexplicably breaks out the champagne and finally has something to toast. I’m not sure why she’s toasting – but at least she’s finally toasting something. On her way out, Bethenny says to her assistant that if Sonja isn’t inviting Heather because she doesn’t want to hear the truth that she thinks Sonja’s in trouble and will get screwed again – And I don’t think it’s the good kind of getting screwed.
Ramona gets teary because she has to walk into parties without Mario by her side. That’s got to be a really hard adjustment. I remember being single and whenever I’d walk into a party I’d panic a little until I found someone I knew… It’s totally different walking into a party with Mr. Stars99 because I really don’t care who else is there – Because I know he and I will have way too much fun for words no matter what… It’s very different…
Ramona is concerned that “What’s His Name” (John) is just a “hanger-on” who is using Dorinda for her social connections and financial success. Ramona does not know if he’s there for the right reasons. Ramona chose not to especially dress up for this occasion (although I think she looks very pretty). LuAnn thinks a single person should always dress well and look good because you just never know who you’re going to meet (or meat)… Sorry
nja arrives with Dominik (24) on her arm and greets others but not Ramona.
Heather arrives and immediately pounces on Sonja. She couldn’t contain herself because Bethenny gave her the time of day and sent Heather a text about Sonja’s business presentation and how she was surprised Heather wasn’t there since she’s a fashion girl. I think partly Bethenny truly thinks that Heather SHOULD have been there because she has current, direct experience in this industry. I also think that at least subconsciously, it was a little jab back at Heather for harassing her about not inviting Kristen to her birthday bash. Everyone can’t be invited to every single thing – Although, arguably, it would have been fairly easy for Bethenny to invite everyone to her birthday party.
LuAnn is also there and asks Sonja about the presentation. Sonja’s lame response was that she has never been invited to theirs – So why would she invite them to hers? LuAnn said hers is on the Shopping Network… lol… Sonja tells the others that Bethenny said she wanted to go. Heather asks Sonja to show them what she’s been working on… Sonja says Heather and LuAnn have never had anything good to say about her and her business ventures. Sonja walks away and doesn’t want to talk to any of them about it because they’re attacking her. Heather says they’re not…
Dorinda doesn’t think “these people’s” criticism of Sonja and her businesses is sincere – She thinks they don’t really care about Sonja and that they’re just being mean. Now Dorinda is someone who opened her own very successful cashmere company… I think she also would have been a good person to be at the presentation. Sonja says that there’s only one person in the room that doesn’t lie – And it’s her. Well, to be fair – It’s hard to lie when you live in the land of Delusion next to De Nile river.
Heather looks Sonja in the face and emphases that she would love to see what Sonja’s been doing. Sonja tells her that when she has some time she will invite her… My Sonja-to-English dictionary tells me that means… Never…lol. Heather’s bellyaching about how she doesn’t understand why Sonja showed Bethenny her presentation and not her and LuAnn… Waaaa…. Waaaa… Waaaa. Gosh, I used to really like Heather… What happened?
Carole shows up to the party late probably because she was still babysitting Adam… Carole tells “Lu” she needs to talk to her and LuAnn agrees because her niece had been texting her all day. Carole says she hasn’t seen LuAnn in 3 whole days. Carole says, “I have been hanging out with someone.” LuAnn said that Adam told her niece about it that very day. Carole tries to excuse her actions by saying they broke up a while ago. LuAnn says, yes, but she knows you…
In her TH, Carole says, “Her niece is upset – I don’t care… Really… I didn’t do anything wrong – He didn’t do anything wrong… He’s a single guy – I’m a single girl – Sometimes when boys and girls meet and there’s chemistry – Things happen.” Okay, let me get this straight… You commit treason when you don’t invite someone you don’t even know to a birthday party – But it’s fully acceptable to f**k a friend’s employee who is also her niece’s ex-boyfriend. Evidently it’s also okay to not tell your friend about it so she has to hear it from another source. Oh, and all of this is on national TV.
This whole attitude of not caring if the niece is upset – You and Heather completely FREAKED out that Bethenny didn’t care about Kristen’s hurt feelings about a missed birthday party… But this is completely fine. Carole… Come back from the dark side. Fortunately, Adam is leaving soon with a group of people (including LuAnn’s niece) to go to a farm in Nicaragua. That trip should be interesting. Perhaps Bravo should film THAT one. Carole and LuAnn decide they’ll just figure things out as they go.
It comes to Dorinda’s attention that Sonja hurt Ramona’s feelings by not greeting her when she first walked into the party. Dorinda plays peacemaker and finds out that Sonja thinks Ramona’s been avoiding her. Ramona just wants Sonja to acknowledge her presence and that she hurt her feelings. Ramona is the last person on earth that Sonja would ever want to hurt. They hug it out. And there was peace throughout the land… Whew.
Dominik is talking to Ramona and Kristen. Kristen suggests that Ramona might want to take a page out of Sonja’s book of dating – And date someone like Dominik. Ramona succeeds in chopping down BOTH Dominik and Kristen when she cavalierly says it might be what Kristen would do if (God forbid) something happened to her husband… But Ramona superiorly says, “I’m deeper than that – So much deeper than that.” Ummm… Ramona – You’ve just called Kristen superficial and you’ve implied Dominik is just for play. And they’re both standing right there… And you’re so self-absorbed that you have no idea what you’ve just done. Ramona says that she doesn’t want to have a sexual fling – She doesn’t need that – She has her hand for that… lol… And I believe she meant it just as it sounds… lol…
At some point in the evening, some of the girls were talking to Ramona about her breasts and how they thought she might have gotten some surgical enhancement in that area. Heather reaches out and tugs at Ramona’s dress so she can look down it. Others kind of feel around and stuff… I’m getting uncomfortable. Is this acceptable behavior now at cocktail parties? I think Ramona loves looking like she’s had some work done. She physically demonstrates the pushups she does that have built up the muscles in that area.
Ramona and LuAnn leave together. Sonja is telling everyone that she’s named after the ice skater Sonja Henning. Dorinda’s creepy boyfriend, “What’s His Name” (John) lewdly asks, “Is it Sonja Henning or Sonja heinie? Of course Sonja shakes her booty at that.
Somehow, John then inexplicably starts to rub up against the back of Sonja… Sonja is eating up the attention and loving every minute of it even though her young date is like 4 feet away. Dorinda asks John where her bag is and he points her to the farthest point away from where he is… Kristen joins and they create a human sandwich rubbing up against each other with Sonja and Kristen as the bread and John as the filling… I just permanently lost my appetite.
Then “What’s His Name” (John), the creepy fungus actually spanks Kristen’s leather-clad hip in a very weird, sexual way… She screams in gleeful aghast and jumps away. In Kristen’s TH she says “Whoa… whoa… whoa…” I guess Mr. Creepy was a little too friendly a little too fast. This is just one of those things you just can’t unsee… Sigh… Pass the eye-bleach.
The women take a trip to Atlantic City. Wait a minute… Is this fair to Atlantic City? It’s barely recovered from Hurricane Sandy. The women are shouting so much at each other on the way that it looks like they’re in jeopardy of surviving the trip itself. Once there they gamble… They drink… Rinse and repeat. Someone says something that hurts someone’s feelings… KMN (Kill me now) if they start whining about invites (or lack thereof), punctuation in text messages, or greeting style… It’s ridiculous… Seriously…
Well, that’s it for this week – I’m finding out that I’m fickly changing my mind about which housewives I like and don’t like with every single episode… Are you? Hope to see you next week… Happy Trails!
The Shahs of Sunset – One Wedding and a Dog Funeral by SunnyGirl
The show opens at Reza’s condo. (Reza brags about his decorating skills — does anyone else’s eyes hurt when Reza’s condo is on?) MJ and Asa show up. They begin talking about the dinner with Mike and Jessica. Reza says he didn’t know how much Jessica really hates them. (I didn’t either – I thought she was ok with them last season.) Asa says they aren’t to blame and that she feels Jessica’s anger is misplaced. Asa asks if they think Jessica was on something because she was extra aggressive at the dinner. Reza replies that Jessica is on a diamond ring and a martini. Reza thinks that Jessica wants to get married so bad that she is angry with them for the GG/Mike situation in Turkey, instead of being angry with Mike because how could she go ahead with wedding plans otherwise? Reza is a smart man sometimes.
Reza shares that he and Adam have decided to go to Thailand for their wedding. MJ asks if he is inviting Mike to the wedding and says that she thinks he should. Reza states that he and Adam have discussed it and they will not be inviting Mike and Jessica.
MJ and GG are in GG’s car with Julio. They are all dressed in black and obviously on their way to somewhere having to do with Pablo. GG shares that she has met someone and, finally after three months, has agreed to go out with him. She says she isn’t good at dating. It causes her anxiety.
Now MJ and GG are at a shop called Art Kraft rentals. It is a taxidermist because MJ doesn’t know how to make peace with losing Pablo. They walk in and it’s an OMG moment! Everywhere are stuffed animals of all varieties. GG gets choked up and says there is a lot of sadness and death all around her. The worst of all the animals is a cat that looks like it is screaming in pain. (Who would DO that??) Julio growls at the stuffed cat. MJ asks some questions about the process and didn’t realize that they take all the insides out and use only the skin. The eyes are glass and the teeth would not be Pablo’s teeth. MJ finally realizes that this would not even be Pablo. GG carefully convinces her that cremation and a memorial service is the way to go. Good job, GG.
Mike and Jessica are having dinner at Madera Kitchen. Jessica calmly states to Mike that ideally she wants a December wedding and then they will begin trying for a baby six months after the wedding. Mike has a “deer in the headlights” look on his face. Jessica begins talking about the dinner with MJ, Asa, Reza and Adam. (Don’t you feel sorry for Adam that he has to put up with all this nonsense?) Jessica says that dinner was out of control, unclassy and uncool. (Really?) In Mike’s TH, he says that Jessica overstepped her bounds. Funny that he never tells Jessica that. Mike says Jessica doesn’t understand the friendship he has with The Shahs. Mike was hoping they could all be friends again. Sorry, Mike.
In two separate scenes, where we are switched back and forth, Asa and Adam and then also Reza and MJ, discuss the bachelor parties. Reza and Adam want totally different things for their parties. It’s kind of funny – Adam wants to have his at a petting zoo and Reza wants a night of debauchery. Adam suggests that maybe a scavenger hunt would be fun. Reza asks if he can touch male body parts. Then, of course, we get down to the real reason behind the scenes. MJ does not want to invite Asa. Reza, however, wants her there. MJ says she is NOT inviting Asa. (I’m not sure where this is going or why MJ doesn’t want Asa there.)
We go to Asifa and Bobby’s house where Asifa is getting ready for her Bollywood birthday party. Bobby makes her kiss Max, the dog, before he will give a present to her. She opens up the box and it’s a gorgeous diamond necklace. Asifa doesn’t act real thrilled though. In Asifa’s TH, she says 10 years ago she thought by now she would be married with two kids. She wants a diamond on her ring finger, not around her neck. Back to the gift – Asifa asks Bobby how much it cost.
We see Asa and her parents at Asa’s house. Asa’s mom wants to go home and asks when the construction will be done. Asa and her parents definitely love each other but they are getting on each other’s nerves while the house is being remodeled. Asa says her house smells like cat pee and lamb being cooked.
The Bollywood party is happening! Wow! Asifa looks really hot. She should rock the Indian look all the time. There is a henna artist who is doing some amazing henna tattoos. Asifa says there is an open bar, great food, great music and a henna artist. She is pretty proud of herself. MJ & Shervin arrive. I’m not impressed with their costumes. Then we see Reza and Adam. While Adam looks pretty cool, Reza has an Afro! A hug Afro! Reza says he is a pimp from the slums of Mumbai. GG and Anita arrive. GG looks beautiful and ladylike, which is unusual for GG.
Of course, the discussion turns to Pablo’s memorial service and who will be there. When Reza finds out that Mike will be at the memorial, he asks MJ if GG knows that. When they ask GG, she says no matter whether Mike is there or not, she will be because she feels like she was Pablo’s aunt. In Reza’s TH, he says there will be two memorials – one for Pablo and one for Mike.
Bobby and Asa are talking. Asa asks how things are going. Bobby says Asifa enjoys patronizing him. He says they argue too much. Bobby says he is just about done with the relationship. He says Asifa wants her way all the time.
Now we see Asifa’s TH where she states that zero thought went into her birthday – that Bobby didn’t do a thing but buy a diamond necklace and that Asa didn’t even get her a card. Boo hoo.
As the cake is being brought in, they sing a Persian version of happy birthday to Asifa. Somehow, and I’m not sure who started it, but cake starts being thrown. Because that’s what you do at a classy birthday party.
Now we see GG on her date with Danny. She is wearing a black t-shirt with bold, gold letters saying GOLD DIGGER. How impressive. She claims she hates dates and doesn’t know how to act. Well, GG. Learn. They are at a bowling alley and she is trying to bowl. Danny tries to show her how to throw the ball and all GG can see is Danny’s butt. Danny is very complimentary to GG and isn’t intimidated by her in the least. GG really likes him which causes her to get drunker and drunker. GG kisses him. She says she is a hot, drunken mess and Danny isn’t taking advantage of her. She likes that. She tells him they should go home and go to bed but Danny is a gentleman and just takes her home.
Now we are at MJ’s condo for Pablo’s memorial. There are pictures blown up to bigger than lifesize. There are tons of beautiful flowers and food and drink everywhere. (When my dad died, his memorial wasn’t that nice. Sorry, dad.) All the usual suspects are showing up, and everyone is dressed in black. Except for Vida. Of course, Mike is the last one to show up and he makes the grand entrance with his dog! Julio is not happy about the dog being there and GG is not happy about Mike being there. MJ gives the eulogy. She says that the only good thing about death is that it brings people together. She says she will be eternally happy that she had Pablo in her life. Now all the guests are coming to pay their respects to MJ. GG tells her that Pablo will never be forgotten.
Mike and Reza are talking. Reza tells Mike that he felt like he got a scolding from Jessica. Mike says he had hoped things would get better but it didn’t happen. Mike says he shouldn’t have to choose between his friends and Jessica. (You’re right, Mike. Who IS it that is making you choose??) GG wants to say something and as she starts to talk, Mike interrupts her by saying something like they were brother and sister. GG erupts! She says he crossed that bro/sis line a year ago. He says if it was so bad, why is she always in his room when they are on vacation? She screams what vacations? He replies Palm Springs. Then there is some screaming about singing Celine Dion songs and he was singing louder.
Reza tells Mike that he and Adam don’t want Mike and Jessica at their wedding. Then Reza backtracks. He says he wants Mike at the wedding but doesn’t want Jessica. Because why would anyone want a person at their wedding that thinks he is evil? Reza and Adam storm out. Mike is hurt that he is “uninvited” (that’s a word that Bravo made up) to Reza’s wedding but says he won’t go without Jessica.
In Memory of Pablo 2001 -2015
Tomorrow … Brandi’s podcast with Kristen …